Scary Ex

I posted a few threads about splitting with my long term bf around new year, and the upshot of it is that he's still not leaving me alone! We've been separated for nearly 2 months but he still calls me and texts me, usually about midnight on a Saturday after he's been drinking all day. He cries down the phone, leaves me voicemails of him crying, texts me asking me to get back with him. He even turned up at my work last night and sat outside in the freezing cold for about an hour waiting for me. I had to go out the back way but I knew he was watching me as he left a voicemail saying that he saw me leaving. He's got a disiplinary at work (which could result in him losing his job) because of all the time he took off after we split, and he blames me for this. I'm getting scared, this isn't normal behavior is it? What can I do?

Reply 1

warranty-ideal

12

Report him to the police for harassment, get a restraining order.

Reply 2

JadedHippy

11

Restraining order. He sounds like a psycho.

*Jaded

Reply 3

-TMG-

9

Keep a record of the times and dates and of what he does when he stalks you. Then ring the police. Keep the voicemails on your phone as evidence. And the texts. Or tell his parents or something.

Reply 4

rosetinted

2

Nope that's definitely not normal behaviour. It's creepy, sadistic and intimidating. You should consider reporting the matter to the police for the purposes of a criminal prosecution under the Malicious Communications Act or Protection from Harassment Act. The protection from harassment act states:

"It is a criminal offence to leave grossly offensive messages over telephone or make indecent or obscene or menacing telephone calls or calls which cause annoyance, inconvenience or needless anxiety"

Most likely the police won't want to turn this into a long, drawn out battle, but they will probably speak to him on your behalf and tell him to back off. As TMG said, keep a record of all unwanted contact with times and dates, plus keep a copy of any texts or messages & give them to the cops.

Reply 5

twiga

OP

15

Hey guys thanks for the replies. I just called my service providor (Vodafone) about getting his number blocked, and apparantly I can't do that, and it's going to cost me £25 to change my number! I also deleted a lot of the messages as soon as I got them, but have a few records of the calls, and kept the voicemail about him seeing me "sneaking out the back of work". He text me just now asking for money - like I'm going to give him any!

Reply 6

envious

What a weird guy. If you know his family or friends maybe you could try expressing your concern over his behaviour to them. They might at least have more luck confronting him and it's not quite as extreme as the police. If it persists though, I think you have no choice but to get them involved :frown:

I know it's unlikely but newspapes and magazines are full of similar stories that have ended really badly :eek:

Reply 7

twiga

OP

15

envious

What a weird guy. If you know his family or friends maybe you could try expressing your concern over his behaviour to them. They might at least have more luck confronting him and it's not quite as extreme as the police. If it persists though, I think you have no choice but to get them involved :frown:

I know it's unlikely but newspapes and magazines are full of similar stories that have ended really badly :eek:

I talked to his friends last night, they've all tried to talk to him and he's ignored them too. I tried to get the site security to move him on last night but they wouldn't as he wasn't posing an immediate threat!

Reply 8

pumpkin7

13

twiga

Hey guys thanks for the replies. I just called my service providor (Vodafone) about getting his number blocked, and apparantly I can't do that, and it's going to cost me £25 to change my number! I also deleted a lot of the messages as soon as I got them, but have a few records of the calls, and kept the voicemail about him seeing me "sneaking out the back of work". He text me just now asking for money - like I'm going to give him any!

£25 to change your number!? you can pick up a sim card for like £5 and you can get your money transferred from your old sim card to the new one.. so that shouldn't be a problem.

as for your ex, i think he is obviously having a few problems letting you go.. maybe you should meet up with him (i know you don't) and just tell him exactly how you feel.. tell him that you don't want him in your life any more, and you don't want to hear from him either - it may sound harsh and mean, but at least it will be coming straight from you, and it will hopefully put him in his place.
if not, i'm not sure what you should do.. he is obviously kind of crazy... or just very very much in love. i'm guessing you broke up with him, which is probably why this is such a problem for him.
but seriously, meet up with him, have a good long talk and put the damn boy in his place.

Scary Ex

Related discussions

Articles for you