The Student Room Group

how close should friends be?

well when me and my ex split it was on mutual terms and we agreed to stay good friends, and ive never looked back on it purely cos we get on so well and have such a good laugh together.

basically i was just wondering where the line should be drawn, i mean we still have tickle attacks and stuff like that, and hug each other, last time i went to see him at uni we also slept in same bed (didnt do anythign tho im a good girl, just slept). how far is too far when friends are concerned tho? i mean with someone like an ex it is a bit confusing cos uve done a lot mroe with them when u went out with them. i have another good male friend, and he hugs me and tickles me and stuff too, and is like a brother to me, so i tink what im doing with my ex is fine.

just wondered if anyone had any opinions on what is too much as friends with an ex.
Reply 1
I think it's just whatever you're comfortable with. As long as being close to your ex isn't stopping you from having other relationships, and you don't have feelings for him anymore, then it's no big deal.
Reply 2
yeh i spose ur right, just as much as we both r comfortable whihc is quite a lot lol
Reply 3
e_clark
well when me and my ex split it was on mutual terms and we agreed to stay good friends, and ive never looked back on it purely cos we get on so well and have such a good laugh together.

basically i was just wondering where the line should be drawn, i mean we still have tickle attacks and stuff like that, and hug each other, last time i went to see him at uni we also slept in same bed (didnt do anythign tho im a good girl, just slept). how far is too far when friends are concerned tho? i mean with someone like an ex it is a bit confusing cos uve done a lot mroe with them when u went out with them. i have another good male friend, and he hugs me and tickles me and stuff too, and is like a brother to me, so i tink what im doing with my ex is fine.

just wondered if anyone had any opinions on what is too much as friends with an ex.


My best mate and his ex are really close but not sleeping in same bed close because if I was in your position and had a bf then as the bf I would not be happy you sleeping in the same bed as your ex unless there was no choice in the matter!
Reply 4
well neither of us have partners right now, if i had a bf i wudnt sleep in same bed as my ex lol, but we r close cos of what we have been thru togther etc, so i think we will always be closer than we would have been if we had never gone out
Reply 5
As long as you are both comfortable with what's happening, and both clear things like sleeping in the same bed is not a sign that you're moving towards having sexual relations or getting back together again, I'd say you were fine; it's down to the individuals, so if you are ok with it, there's no issue.
Reply 6
I dunno, sleeping in the same bed?? I would not do that with my ex. Even if i didn't have my current gf.
Reply 7
SciFi25
I dunno, sleeping in the same bed?? I would not do that with my ex. Even if i didn't have my current gf.


All couples/ex's/friends are on very different terms and levels of closeness. Like I said, it's situation independant which only the OP can really judge.
Reply 8
i spose maybe that is too much, but we r so close, we didnt split cos we fell out, just cos he went to uni, maybe u have a point tho...
King Leigh
As long as you are both comfortable with what's happening, and both clear things like sleeping in the same bed is not a sign that you're moving towards having sexual relations or getting back together again, I'd say you were fine; it's down to the individuals, so if you are ok with it, there's no issue.


:yy: I agree 100%.
I slept in the same bed as my boyfriend the night he split up with me (we didnt fight bout it ) although it was a bit hard cus obviously i wanted to touch him, it wasnt wierd in that sense, and im sure we will do it again, cus i dont have a problem with it and neither does he. We even got changed infront of each other cus like, seen it all before lol!
Reply 11
yeh exactly lol, it just seems normal to me, i got chaanged in front of him too, not too bothered about it, i think with an ex u have a different kind of relationship friendwise, simply cos of the closeness u have both felt, espesh if it was long term
Well if your single you can tickle and muck around with each other and stuff, veen when you got a girlfriend i see no harm in the odd hug just as a friendship gesture.