At What Age Should You Start Sleeping Around Your Bf/Gf's House?

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RedFlowers*
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#1
Report Thread starter 10 years ago
#1
When I was around 15 I started to sleep around my boyfriends house (he was 2 years older than me and we had been together for 2 years. I had my own room there as my parents requested that to his parents and we obeyed that. The other day someone decided to call me a weirdo because I did this (I'm 21 now) and because our parents allowed it to happen.

Do you think this is weird/wrong? Are you too young at the age of 15 to be sleeping at your boyfriend's/girlfriend's house?
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ilex_noemi
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#2
Report 10 years ago
#2
I don't think thats weird.. you did have seperate rooms!
Sharing a bed would have been a bit strange for your parents to allow
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FrostyLemon
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#3
Report 10 years ago
#3
Its all down to the parents really. My parents and my ex's were very lenient and they allowed us to stay over early on in the relationship and probably aware that we were having sex etc. I know quite a few others who had/have similar experiences, I know some who aren't allowed to sleep over at all. But I have to say I've never heard of someone having their own room at their boyfriend/girlfriends house.

We were 16 and 18 at the time.
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pinkangelgirl
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#4
Report 10 years ago
#4
both mine and my boyfriends Mum's were quite strict and we werent allowed to stay in the same bed even when we were like 20 lol....

Goodness knows why!!
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Anonymous #1
#5
Report 10 years ago
#5
I have never slept round a boyfriends house, and im not even allowed boyfriends to hang out round my house let alone stay the night !(im 20 btw!) however my parents are devout catholics no sex before marriage etc and i respect their opinions as while i live under their roof i have to abide by their rules. I personally dont see a big thing with staying over doesnt bother me i cant, ill stay at my boyfriend sometimes till about 11.30 pm by then im tired and would just go to sleep anyway so i may aswell drive home and sleep in my own bed.

For me staying over is a practical thing if we last when im at uni then he will just stay over as it will be too long to drive home but other than that i dont really feel the need to stay over !
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Kattt_452
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#6
Report 10 years ago
#6
No, but that's because our parents (both mine and my boyfriend's) allowed us to sleep over together/were also lenient. I vaguely remember it started out as we had to sleep in seperate rooms, then I always remember being allowed to sleep in with him.
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little_wizard123
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#7
Report 10 years ago
#7
(Original post by RedFlowers*)
When I was around 15 I started to sleep around my boyfriends house (he was 2 years older than me and we had been together for 2 years. I had my own room there as my parents requested that to his parents and we obeyed that. The other day someone decided to call me a weirdo because I did this (I'm 21 now) and because our parents allowed it to happen.

Do you think this is weird/wrong? Are you too young at the age of 15 to be sleeping at your boyfriend's/girlfriend's house?
How is that weird? His parents were stopping their son break the law... It'd be weird if they did allow it tbh.
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fredscarecrow
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#8
Report 10 years ago
#8
I've never been allowed my boyfriend to sleep in my room at home - I'm 22 and for the first time my boyfriend is stopping over - but in the spare room. It's my parent's house, so their rules. They let me sleep over at his though, and know we share a room and that he sleeps over at mine in uni. I just think they're uncomfortable with it in their own house. That or it's because I have a single bed and they've just assumed we wouldn't want to sleep together in it (we would) but I don't have the kind of r'ship with my parents where we could discuss it.

My last boyfriend...again I used to sleep over at his, and him at my place at uni and my parents knew that (and his parents). That was age 18. The first time I told my parents I was staying at his overnight they found it a little uncomfortable, but it was never mentioned again.

My boyfriend as a teenager...we were allowed in his room with the door shut etc, but had I ever stopped over I know I would have been made to sleep in another room...but we were 14/15 so that's not really surprising.

I had friends at 14/15 that were allowed to sleep in boyfriend's beds etc, with very lenient parents. I think they assumed sex would happen anyway, so they'd rather it was in the security of the house rather than in a wood etc (like the rest of us! - well fumblings, not sex in most cases)
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tehFrance
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#9
Report 10 years ago
#9
I had people staying over from 14-15, no biggie in a French household :smug:
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ChelseyElla
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#10
Report 10 years ago
#10
I was allowed boyfriends to stay round if they didn't live near by from the age 17 (we didn't have a spare room so we had to share my room). My parents are happily letting my boyfriend stay round over Easter (we're 21 and 20 now) but when I went to stay with his parents at Newyear/eve, I had to sleep in the spare room. I don't mind though as its there house.
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Clez
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#11
Report 10 years ago
#11
I think if you're sleeping together anyway and you're over 16 it shouldnt really matter. My parents (my mum mainly) didnt allow it with my ex when i was 18 because my 15 year old sister "might get influenced BECAUSE AT 15 SHE DOESNT KNOW WHAT SEX IS!???"

if i had kids and they were asking - so long as they were both legal and the partner wasnt a psycho/moron/thief/abusive and they didnt have sex which i could hear and they washed their own bedsheets i wouldnt care
1
Anonymous #2
#12
Report 10 years ago
#12
my parents are so strict, i can in no way stay over my boyfriend's house, even though I'm 20.
They won't even have their childrens partners anywhere near the bedrooms, unless they live far away and have to stay over, in which case one of us has to give up a bed for them.

It's so weird, seeing as at uni, i could stay out all night at a house party or whatever, but when I said I might stay at my boyfriend's after a night out just so I won't have the hassle of making my way home, my mum went crazy and started declaring that she will get me, demanded to know where his parents were and where i was sleeping.

Surely she must know that allowing to sleep over doesn't necessarily mean sex. Sex can happen without sleepovers. but this is too awkward to explain. she even says in the past it's ok as long as we are safe, but again, it's all about the appearance of being respectable, and she doesn't want me to get a bad name.

it's also worse for me, as i'm the youngest of the family and so perceived by everyone as the innocent, immature and vulnerable one.
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Schmokie Dragon
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#13
Report 10 years ago
#13
I got my first 'proper' boyfriend at 15 and we started sleeping over straight away. We shared a bed from pretty early on, although initially he slept on a futon. My parents were pretty chilled out - they trusted me to be sensible and I was. Once I turned 16 they didn't care if we were having sex as long as we used protection. Having boyfriends stay over in my room was never really a problem.

I don't think there is a 'should' about it, though. When a couple start sharing a bed (or even just staying over) depends on when they are comfortable with it and whether their parents/guardians are happy with it.
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cdowling
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#14
Report 5 years ago
#14
My bf is 18 and I'm 16 &1/2, do u think this is exceptable?
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bones-mccoy
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#15
Report 5 years ago
#15
Luckily my boyfriend has his own house so that's not a problem, and my house is too small for anyone to stay over so
0
Anonymous #3
#16
Report 4 years ago
#16
All of you think about it, if your daughter was 15 ( nearly 16 ) and was going out with her boyfriend for 6 months and they were really strong and all her other mates we allowed to sleep over with there boyfriend how embarrassing it would be for her to say oh I’m not allowed, I’m 15 (nearly 16) and I’m not allowed a boyfriend to stay? What is the difference? He stays around mine all day? So why can’t he sleep we could be having sex in the day so what’s the difference at night? My mum is just embarrassing me and I feel a strong connection with my boyfriend and I have anxiety and it makes me feel better when he’s with me, because when he isn’t I cry myself to sleep? Doesn’t my mum want to help me? She said she wants me in care aswell she isn’t looking out for me she’s just trying to make my life hell, I’m on contraception aswell and she knows we have sex, wouldn’t your parents rather you safe in your house, then them not knowing where u are or you out all night because your boyfriend can’t go back to yours? Soz rant over. Doesn’t matter what age you are atall it’s about your mum trusting you I feel so embarrassed by the fact she doesn’t I just want a Mum to be there for me not one to shout at me 24/7
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bloople32
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#17
Report 4 years ago
#17
Right. I am 16 and have been with my boyfriend for 2 years. We are very strong and my family love him. At first it was a funny cringey relationship then once it got a bit further on it got more serious. However, we have never slept over at each others houses because personally I feel it’s something quite special and I want to save that and plus neither of us have double beds so it would be abit useless if like he’s somewhere else in the house like what’s the point then(not saying the point is to have sex)? My friend who is 6 months younger than me (15) has had her boyfriend for about 4 months and they started sleeping at each others houses after 1 month. What is everyone’s opinions on this? It makes me angry and at first I was jealous and I still kinda am but because they do it every weekend I feel like they would get bored because of it and it wouldn’t feel like something nice. It’s ruining our friendship tbh.
1
TheBomber09
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#18
Report 4 years ago
#18
I don't think that's weird at all, especially if you had different beds anyway
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Jack.Gorman
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#19
Report 3 years ago
#19
I am a 15 year old boy and I have a girlfriend who is also 15 years old. We go round each other’s houses every weekend at least once and don’t really see each other on weekdays as we go to different schools. Yeah I may only be 15 but I am also very mature for my age as is my girlfriend. When we are together and we may have a film on the TV or something, it is very pleasant and enjoyable when we are all cuddled up together in bed. It would be a real nice thing if we were allowed to sleep with each other because before one of us has to go home, we are laying together and we are so tired and it would be such a lovely thing to be able to sleep with each other and wake up with each other the next day as it would be less pressure on having to wait to get picked up and staying awake but also for simply the enjoyment of that lovely time spent together asleep. I have tried explaining this to my parents but they will totally not allow it at all. They know how mature I am as they have watched me grow up and they know me because I obviously am their son but they still will not allow it whatsoever. I think this is maybe because it was wrong when they were my age and they were at least 20 when they were allowed. I just wish they would understand how times have changed now and 15 year olds in our time do not play teachers in the garage or whatever they did when they were my age. I personally feel like it is okay and no problem with it at all. Fair enough if they disliked my girlfriend or something but they really do not. They really like my girlfriend and are proud of me for it. It’s all about trust I think and how sensible they think you are. Sleeping with your boyfriend/girlfriend Is a real treat I’m sure and I just wish it would be allowed for me. I’ll keep trying though.
1
Callicious
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#20
Report 3 years ago
#20
When I was fifteen, I flew over to another country for a long-distance relationship I had with a woman since I was thirteen. It lasted a good 4.5 years until University kicked in and it became untenable. We actually slept in a tent, and I can say that I dipped my wick for the first time in that tent, on a cold, wintry winters night.

I don't think that sleeping over at your BF's house in your own room is a weird thing when you're that young or at your parents behest. If anything, it seems like a decent thing to do, and a lot more convenient, since you'd have your own room! So rub the fact you had two rooms instead of one in their face!
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