Girlfriend wants me to get fit

My advice for your mate:

1) Get aids
2) Loose weight
3) Give her aids

You don't just get married to have security for the rest of your life. Marriage involves a relationship--emotional as well as physical. You cannot discount the physical aspect of a relationship because you think security/"love" is the only thing of importance.

There is a reason 50%+ marriages end in divorce. Marriage is not unconditional love forever with no consequences for any action. No one wants to marry someone slim and attractive, only to have them fall into security/laziness to become a lard-ass. If my husband starts gaining weight, I tell him. I also do not let myself gain weight. Marriage takes work, and staying attractive is part of that work. Yes, people lose hair or get hurt, that's a little different than becoming a slovenly person. Bald guys can look good, scars are a part of life, getting fat (or at least staying fat in this person's case) is just laziness.

I'm not saying all marriages dissolve because people get fat or anything, but what I am saying is that physical attraction (as well as mental attraction of being with someone who takes care of his/herself, is an active, motivated person) is a part of marriage, and will always be until hormones/sex organs finally **** out when people are in their late 60s-70s~.

You seem like a really nice down to earth person......... Theres more to life than looks and beeing super attractive. I actually feel sorry for you if that is soo big in your relationship that you have to state it before you get married. Yes i agree that if my parter suddenly became really lazy and eating junk all the time then i would say something, but that is only because they wold have changed as a person, not because there are becoming 'less attractive'. If you put that much emphasis on that you must have little else in your relationship going for you.

Next that ho.

Hi, firstly this is on behalf of my best mate. Hes 18 years old. He has been going out with the same girl since they were 15 and it was all going well till recently. My mate is 5 foot 9 inches tall average build and used to be a slender 11 stone 7 and had a lean 31'' waist. Sadly though he was involved in an accident which left him off work for 6 months, and in a wheelchair. ( He has recoved fully now) During that time however he gained weight. He now weighs a hefty 13 stone 7 pounds and his waist has increased to 36''. His girl friend says she doesnt find him attractive now and is threatening to leave him. He says he's happy with his body. What should he do ? Is he overweight ? Should he dump her ? Is she right ?

If the sexes were reversed in this story, this thread would be bursting with men telling to op to acknowledge the fact that 'men are visual' and for them to wake up to the reality of the importance of this within the relationship. To 'put the fork down bitch'.

"A mate" yeah?

On a more serious note, if the girl would leave merely on a boy putting on some weight, she aint worth it! Leave her before she does!

Not in the slightest, you silly goose.

If the sexes were reversed in this story, this thread would be bursting with men telling to op to acknowledge the fact that 'men are visual' and for them to wake up to the reality of the importance of this within the relationship. To 'put the fork down bitch'.

Instead it's peppered with butt-hurts.

Just lose the weight op. Why on earth would you want to stay fat? I don't understand how people can see that their waist line is expanding and think the situation is ok.

Of course i would want her to lose weight, but if she was in an accident and had just fully recovered, i think i would cut her some slack if she had put on weight.