Parents ashamed of me because....I sleep in?

    • Thread Starter

    Hi TSR,
    I have a bit of a strange one to put forward today. I went downstairs not even half an hour ago, and sat in the lounge with my parents as I put my trainers on. I said, 'Hi' to them and my Mother responded, 'hi' back. My father on the other hand stated that he wasn't sure if he wanted to talk to me. Upon asking why, he said that he was 'ashamed of me' because I slept in until 3pm.
    Now, admittedly, I do sleep in past 1pm a lot, however I am a student at uni (living at home and travelling in), I work a late shift at work (finish at 11:10pm on sun/mondays, getting home around half past) and I go out a lot with friends atm which sees me getting back at later hours. I often study late too: I'll revise/look at past papers/read articles on my laptop in bed, but they seem to think that all I do stay up and play games, which I rarely do.

    Now, I was wondering if my fathers 'ashamed attitude' is fair or if it is, in my view a bit too far. He seems to think that all people that go to university wake up before 10am and go to bed before 11pm....he doesn't believe me when I say that a lot of people my age stay up past 3am and he says that he doesn't believe me when I say that people occasionally do all nighters. I find it hard to believe that someone can be so misinformed...or naive even.

    Also bear in mind that I have had a bit of trouble in the past with depression and anxiety which occasionally makes me struggle with sleep if I have something on my mind.


    My uncle is the same. You may know him. He's called Bilbo Baggins.

    I think being ashamed is taking it too far.

    Whether it's fair or not is irrelevant. He's allowed to be ashamed of you if he wants to be because in his opinion sleeping in is lazy. However, he isn't hurting you in any way by hating your lifestyle, nor does he take any steps to change them. If he did then that would definitely be considered "unfair".

    Did your parents go to Uni?

    If not they may not realise that this is normal for students who always work better at 0200. it can be useful practice for when you have small children who want to play games at 0400

    I would not be ashamed if my kids slept. They were all up before me this morning anyway

    I could have written this word for word.

    My parents seem to be living in their own world where they think that the children should wake up at 6am to milk the invisible cows. :grumble:

    Did your parents start working at 16? Or maybe they were born in a different country? Something along those lines?

    If you're doing well on your course, and working part time, with the schedule you have, they have nothing to be 'ashamed' about.
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Updated: April 14, 2012
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