Does anyone else just want a quiet life? Watch

insignificant
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#1
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I feel like I'm surrounded by people wanting to climb mountains and move countries for jobs and internships and etc. I'm doing a degree, but after that I just want a small regular job very close to my family, not moving out of my home city.

I just want a peaceful life, I'm very family orientated and don't want to move away. Does anyone else feel this way, or am I just incredibly old fashioned.
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loopy786
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#2
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I used to have such big dreams.

Now, I just want to maybe work with a charity or something and learn a few languages and just live an ordinary life. I've decided that the life of people who are trying to get to the top is too ugly and can really decrease the value of important things.

That said, I know I won't be satisfied with not continually working for something, but it's just not worth the eventual trouble, and I'd rather make sure I keep my values intact rather than cast them aside for a short-term burst as an overly successful person.
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zara55
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You aren't "old fashioned" as such, plenty of people a long time ago wanted a life full of adventure whilst others wanted to potter about in their gardens and enjoy lengthy afternoon naps. It's all down to the individual - live the way you want to live.

Also it isn't wrong to care about your family and to want to be near them.

That said, if you avoid doing more with your life because it feels scary or beyond you, I would suggest taking on a few more challenges than you currently do, just to push yourself a little - sometimes it isn't "personality" that makes us do or not do things as much as lessons we mis-learned as children about what we are capable of. Sometimes we are capable of more than we think and there can be a real sense of achievement and fulfillment about pushing yourself and getting beyond the comfort zone to something that feels more real.

Just a couple of thoughts.
Zara
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Doskey
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#4
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Nope you're not the only one. I do want to move away from where I live now and will probably live abroad for a year but after that I'm sure I'll come back and live up north somewhere. Unlike you I'm not really bothered about moving away from my family, I love them but I want my own space.
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geetar
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#5
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'All the fame you should look for in life is to have lived it quietly'.
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Vanilla*Pod
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#6
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I completely agree with you OP!

I'm just coming to the end of my degree in London- I used to want the huge city career etc.
Now, however, I want a job in my home town that I love- it doesnt have to make big bucks. All I want in life is a healthy, happy family, a loving life with my fiance and in a few years marriage and kids.

Sometimes I worry that I'm not fulfilling what people expect of me- but ultimately its my life and I want to be happy

[Edit: Whats with the negs?! It's my life- go live your own how you want to and respect how I want to!]
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LtCommanderData
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#7
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I always thought I'd leave where I'm from and never go back, but after being at uni (only 80 miles or so from where I mostly grew up) I can't wait to finish my degree and get back there. Quiet life ftw!
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roh
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(Original post by Doskey)
Nope you're not the only one. I do want to move away from where I live now and will probably live abroad for a year but after that I'm sure I'll come back and live up north somewhere. Unlike you I'm not really bothered about moving away from my family, I love them but I want my own space.
Exactly this.

I used to want to do all of the big, exciting, shiny stuff in the City but now realise I'd prefer regular working hours, a job which I feel makes a bit of a difference and to live comfortably.

Fair play to those who find that will make them happy, but I can't say I'm one of them any more.

To slightly adulterate a Chinese curse 'may you live an interesting life'
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Psyk
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#9
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I'm kind of the same. I have moved away from my home town, but only because I got a job somewhere else. I didn't specifically intend to move away. And I don't intend to move abroad or anything like that. I'm not discounting it either if that's where my career or hypothetical relationship takes me. I don't have any particular desire to do anything out of the ordinary with my life.

But I do have a career that I like. So it's not quite the same.
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JessaminePoppy
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I'm absolutely the opposite, but being different doesn't mean "old-fashioned"! Your desires are obviously not as unusual as you thought, going by the above posts. Don't worry about what other people think, be yourself. (Sorry about putting a clichè down, but as clichés go, it's a pretty nifty one).
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JackGoMad
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Hmm, I don't mind the prospect of a busy career and being kept at work for most of the day. I don't particularly mind the prospect of city life either (having lived in the Cotswolds growing up and being at Exeter now, London does seem rather intimidating).

But I still get what you mean about a quiet life. It bothers me that it's almost expected that everybody do a million things before they die. We're certainly supposed to want to. I'm not sure I do; I basically just want to get a job that I like well enough, a home that I like, and some time to do the few things that I like to do when I have free time - watching TV, playing guitar, playing videogames, reading books, for example.

It's similar to a problem I have with expectations of students. Why, when applying for a 'top job', are we expected to be editors of magazines, Presidents of societies, active athletes, etc? Is it not enough that we work hard on our degrees, so that we must work at our leisure activities too? It seems to me that reading novels is considered worthless unless you're an active literary critic, playing music is worthless unless you actively promote gigs. Obviously employers like activities where work goes in because it shows people are driven or a measurable sense of passion, but I tend to find things more relaxing if I don't have to work at it, and that's pretty much what I go for outside of working.

That's my convoluted and probably nonsensical way of saying that I just want to get up, go to work, go home, and be left alone.
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jamboogy
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#12
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Do what you want. Don't bother trying to 'conform' to anything
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Ra Ra Ra
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#13
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You're not old-fashioned. Many people - most of my friends, in fact - in my town aren't planning on moving. It's an insular type of place where my grandparents know other friends' grandparents, etc. Most people in my college don't even go to a university outside the South West!

Personally, I'm the complete opposite - I'm leaving as soon as I'm financially able to. But I think you'll find that many people who want to travel the world often end up exactly where they started: home. I might even, one day. I want to see the world, but I also want a quiet, peaceful life.

(The only difference being is that I don't see myself having that kind of life in England. But as above, I might change my mind somewhere down the line.)
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plimsolls
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Oh god yes, my dream is to marry a farmer and live a life of near solitude but surrounded by my family. (And cows and pigs.)

Edit: Amazed that people are offended by this. xx
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insignificant
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#15
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(Original post by JackGoMad)
Hmm, I don't mind the prospect of a busy career and being kept at work for most of the day. I don't particularly mind the prospect of city life either (having lived in the Cotswolds growing up and being at Exeter now, London does seem rather intimidating).

But I still get what you mean about a quiet life. It bothers me that it's almost expected that everybody do a million things before they die. We're certainly supposed to want to. I'm not sure I do; I basically just want to get a job that I like well enough, a home that I like, and some time to do the few things that I like to do when I have free time - watching TV, playing guitar, playing videogames, reading books, for example.

It's similar to a problem I have with expectations of students. Why, when applying for a 'top job', are we expected to be editors of magazines, Presidents of societies, active athletes, etc? Is it not enough that we work hard on our degrees, so that we must work at our leisure activities too? It seems to me that reading novels is considered worthless unless you're an active literary critic, playing music is worthless unless you actively promote gigs. Obviously employers like activities where work goes in because it shows people are driven or a measurable sense of passion, but I tend to find things more relaxing if I don't have to work at it, and that's pretty much what I go for outside of working.

That's my convoluted and probably nonsensical way of saying that I just want to get up, go to work, go home, and be left alone.
Completely agree. I feel like a performing monkey sometimes. Because I have anxiety issues, I have all on doing my degree, so when I eventually feel I can get a job and they ask why I didn't do anything besides focusing on my degree I'm going to have to tell them why.
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Guy3105
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#16
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“I have lived through much, and now I think I have found what is needed for happiness. A quiet secluded life in the country, with the possibility of being useful to people to whom it is easy to do good, and who are not accustomed to have it done to them; then work which one hopes may be of some use; then rest, nature, books, music, love for one’s neighbor — such is my idea of happiness. And then, on top of all that, you for a mate, and children perhaps. — What more can the heart of a man desire?” - Leo Tolstoy. Bam.
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sil3nt_cha0s
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(Original post by insignificant)
I feel like I'm surrounded by people wanting to climb mountains and move countries for jobs and internships and etc. I'm doing a degree, but after that I just want a small regular job very close to my family, not moving out of my home city.

I just want a peaceful life, I'm very family orientated and don't want to move away. Does anyone else feel this way, or am I just incredibly old fashioned.
The problem is your focusing on the things in life that don't really matter. When I was a kid I had hopes and dreams. We all did. But over time, the daily grind gets in the way and you miss the things that really matter, even though they are right in front of you, staring you in the face. I think the next time you should ask yourself "Am I on the right track here?". I don't mean to be rude but people like you I really pity. So maybe you could use the few brain cells you have and take advantage of the knowledge I have given you now. Good luck.
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Norton1
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(Original post by JessaminePoppy)
I'm absolutely the opposite, but being different doesn't mean "old-fashioned"! Your desires are obviously not as unusual as you thought, going by the above posts. Don't worry about what other people think, be yourself. (Sorry about putting a clichè down, but as clichés go, it's a pretty nifty one).
Why does no one ever end that cliche without the obvious caveat '...unless you're Jeffrey Dahmer'?
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Sternumator
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#19
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#19
I want a quiet life really but I know my family and friends will think I am a failure if I do that so I want to get a good job because I feel I need to prove myself.
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Megaross
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#20
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Yeah I'm the same "Oh I want to go travelling and live in a big city blah blah blah" just doesn't appeal to me.
I'm not fussed, I just want a job paying enough for me to get on the property ladder and launch me into property development. I'm not moving out of my home town either, I hate being so far from my friends and family for uni.

I just want to settle down and start a family before I'm 25, live close to my mates and family, make a bit of money doing something I enjoy and relax.
I know theres a whole world out there, what difference does seeing it make? If you told me I could see something no one has seen before in the universe, an alternate planet or something then I might be interested.
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