Fat friend breaks your furniture: What do you do?
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Original post by Aspiringlawstudent
What kind of friend breaks something belonging to their friend and doesn't immediately volunteer to pay for it? I would be horrendously guilty and apologetic if I'd broken something of a friend and would get my wallet out straight away.
as would i but at the end of the day its not like he got a hammer to the chair, and i would never dream of accepting the money when my friends offer to pay.
We just laughed and then went and bought a joint of ham.
Original post by TheSownRose
E.
If it wasn't good enough to withstand a person, it obviously wasn't fit for purpose and my friend has done me a favour in preventing me from going through it at some stage in the future.
If it wasn't good enough to withstand a person, it obviously wasn't fit for purpose and my friend has done me a favour in preventing me from going through it at some stage in the future.
What rubbish.
So all furniture should be made to withstand the weight of the increasing number of obese people? We should have chairs made wide enough to accomodate 25 stone people with 4 foot wide arses and the rest of us should sit on them looking like Ronnie Corbett? We should have to pay the increased price of this reinforced furniture because an increasing number of people have poor eating habits or a lack of self control? We already contribute to their travel costs when we fly. We already subsidise their train and bus travel because they use up two seats but only pay for one. We already contribute to their increased use of NHS resources, including reinforced and wide beds. Obesity is set to cost us more than smoking and alcoholism and will be right up their with caring for the elderly. The difference is that we all get old and it's not a choice.
Now you want us to arrange our homes for their benefit. Perhaps we should also widen our doors and stock up on pies too, have an engine hoist to lift them in and out of the sofa sized chair we installed for them.
In most cases being fat is a lifestyle choice and when you make a lifestyle choice you take on the responsibilities that go with it. If you choose to be fat then don't expect me to be happy if I am asked to contribute to it unless you are happy to contribute to my lifestyle too.
Original post by Bellissima
erm what? strange question!
of course i'd just buy a new chair, never bring it up and feel the same as i always did about my friend! i'd hardly be a good friend/person otherwise. they'd be so embarassed...
of course i'd just buy a new chair, never bring it up and feel the same as i always did about my friend! i'd hardly be a good friend/person otherwise. they'd be so embarassed...
Wow.
Any of my friends would offer to pay. I would refuse to accept.
It seems that you are not alone in being happy to have friends who will damage your possessions and not own up or offer to pay. Nice friends.
Original post by kopite493
as would i but at the end of the day its not like he got a hammer to the chair, and i would never dream of accepting the money when my friends offer to pay.
Really?
Even if it were very expensive and you couldn't afford to replace it yourself?
Original post by Aspiringlawstudent
Really?
Even if it were very expensive and you couldn't afford to replace it yourself?
Even if it were very expensive and you couldn't afford to replace it yourself?
The easiest way to loose friends is to bring money in the equation. Friendship is more valuable than a chair.
Original post by BHS12
Would rather have a fellow fat friend than a douchebag like yourself 
But this is part of the problem, the 'normalising' of obesity.
I don't advocate ridiculing or mocking fat people but nor do I see any benefit in making it acceptable.
It's a difficult balance, people shouldn't be abused for being fat but it is shifting in a dangerous direction, fat people are banding together for mutual support and demanding the right to be fat. As this movement grows and the support groups get larger we face a real potential crisis. It has become a world wide movement with huge support in the UK and the USA.
I would hate to see a return to Billy Bunter type images in childrens comics, a systematic mockery of obesity, but this right to be fat crap is going to cause problems.
Original post by ~Kat~
The easiest way to loose friends is to bring money in the equation. Friendship is more valuable than a chair.
Eh? I assume you mean lose.
But anyway, would I really want to keep a friend that broke my things and wouldn't pay for them? I can't afford to spend several thousand pounds a year replacing all my furniture after they've been over
Original post by GStevens
What rubbish.
So all furniture should be made to withstand the weight of the increasing number of obese people? We should have chairs made wide enough to accomodate 25 stone people with 4 foot wide arses and the rest of us should sit on them looking like Ronnie Corbett? We should have to pay the increased price of this reinforced furniture because an increasing number of people have poor eating habits or a lack of self control? We already contribute to their travel costs when we fly. We already subsidise their train and bus travel because they use up two seats but only pay for one. We already contribute to their increased use of NHS resources, including reinforced and wide beds. Obesity is set to cost us more than smoking and alcoholism and will be right up their with caring for the elderly. The difference is that we all get old and it's not a choice.
Now you want us to arrange our homes for their benefit. Perhaps we should also widen our doors and stock up on pies too, have an engine hoist to lift them in and out of the sofa sized chair we installed for them.
In most cases being fat is a lifestyle choice and when you make a lifestyle choice you take on the responsibilities that go with it. If you choose to be fat then don't expect me to be happy if I am asked to contribute to it unless you are happy to contribute to my lifestyle too.
So all furniture should be made to withstand the weight of the increasing number of obese people? We should have chairs made wide enough to accomodate 25 stone people with 4 foot wide arses and the rest of us should sit on them looking like Ronnie Corbett? We should have to pay the increased price of this reinforced furniture because an increasing number of people have poor eating habits or a lack of self control? We already contribute to their travel costs when we fly. We already subsidise their train and bus travel because they use up two seats but only pay for one. We already contribute to their increased use of NHS resources, including reinforced and wide beds. Obesity is set to cost us more than smoking and alcoholism and will be right up their with caring for the elderly. The difference is that we all get old and it's not a choice.
Now you want us to arrange our homes for their benefit. Perhaps we should also widen our doors and stock up on pies too, have an engine hoist to lift them in and out of the sofa sized chair we installed for them.
In most cases being fat is a lifestyle choice and when you make a lifestyle choice you take on the responsibilities that go with it. If you choose to be fat then don't expect me to be happy if I am asked to contribute to it unless you are happy to contribute to my lifestyle too.
The question says 'fat', not morbidly obese. Hence, I based my response on a fat person rather than the person you are describing.
I think I'd mention it to them, in a joking way, as otherwise there would be an elephant in the room (
)
I wouldn't ask them the pay for a new chair though.
)I wouldn't ask them the pay for a new chair though.
my bf's friend broke his suspention in his car! :O lol x
I broke a chair once when I was very VERY heavily pregnant. It was one of my mother's dining chairs. She was pissed off about it and I was mortified.
My husband has broken about 2 or 3 of our dining chairs. I was understanding the first time, but pissed off the second and third times because I had warned him against using them after the first time! He uses his computer chair at the dining table now.
If a fat friend broke one of my chairs, I'd probably replace the chair, say nothing to them about it, but be sure to make sure they don't sit on a similar chair the next time they come round.
My husband has broken about 2 or 3 of our dining chairs. I was understanding the first time, but pissed off the second and third times because I had warned him against using them after the first time! He uses his computer chair at the dining table now.
If a fat friend broke one of my chairs, I'd probably replace the chair, say nothing to them about it, but be sure to make sure they don't sit on a similar chair the next time they come round.
Original post by TheSownRose
The question says 'fat', not morbidly obese. Hence, I based my response on a fat person rather than the person you are describing.
And I said obese, not morbidly obese.
Obese is generally stated as about 20% over ideal weight. Ideal weight takes account of height, weight, build, muscle mass etc, not just BMI. As a rough guide you're overweight between 25-30 bmi, obese over 30 bmi and morbidly obese over 35 bmi.
If you can describe someone as fat then there is a pretty good chance that they are obese. Anyone fat enough to break a chair, take up two seats on a bus or carry more weight in their arse than I am allowed as baggage is probably obese.
You go ahead and draw a distinction between fat and obese if you like but it's a very thin line.
The justification of fatness is a perfectly warranted response to the unfair vilification of fat people but let's not see it swing too far, being fat is not good, it is not healthy and the acronym BBW seldom justifies the second B.
Original post by Aspiringlawstudent
Really?
Even if it were very expensive and you couldn't afford to replace it yourself?
Even if it were very expensive and you couldn't afford to replace it yourself?
yep id just get over it :/
Original post by Fail Whale
a) Demand that they replace said item of furniture. Friend is mortified and you're embarrassed for them, but at the end of the day you really liked that chair and they broke it.
b) Casually mention that your favourite chair is broken and you wonder how it happened. This gives them the opportunity to turn themselves in and is less embarrassing than the first option, but there is the significant risk that they may not fess up.
c) Buy a new chair yourself and never mention the incident to Fat Friend at all. Friendship remains superficially intact but you'll always feel slightly bitter about the chair incident.
d) Buy a new chair and never invite Fat Friend to your house again.
e) Other
b) Casually mention that your favourite chair is broken and you wonder how it happened. This gives them the opportunity to turn themselves in and is less embarrassing than the first option, but there is the significant risk that they may not fess up.
c) Buy a new chair yourself and never mention the incident to Fat Friend at all. Friendship remains superficially intact but you'll always feel slightly bitter about the chair incident.
d) Buy a new chair and never invite Fat Friend to your house again.
e) Other
If s/he broke my ****ing chair, they'll ****ing pay for it.
Original post by F Ellen
Haha! Well I hope the OP realises how much thought has gone into this!
I was at a cafe with some friends once, and one of my larger friends managed to utterly destroy her chosen chair when she sat down. It was mortifying, no one really knew what to say. I really think that beanie chairs should be compulsory in cafes nowadays.
I was at a cafe with some friends once, and one of my larger friends managed to utterly destroy her chosen chair when she sat down. It was mortifying, no one really knew what to say. I really think that beanie chairs should be compulsory in cafes nowadays.
Should not be eating in the cafe in the first place.
Original post by TheSownRose
The question says 'fat', not morbidly obese. Hence, I based my response on a fat person rather than the person you are describing.
By "fat" I mean "obese enough to damage furniture". But I would have thought that was pretty obvious.
Besides, "Fat Friend" sounds nicer than "Morbidly Obese Mate" IMO.
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