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How do I stop???
I can't stop thinking about someone and it's driving me crazy! I've never been attracted to someone so much in my life (on every level, not just physically) and he obviously feels the same, that's very apparent. But for reasons I'm not going to go into, it can't happen, or at least it shouldn't. I just am finding it really difficult to put him out of my mind, especially as I know he wants something to happen between us too. If anything does happen, it might not be yet for a while.Any advice would be much appreciated.
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johnnysgirl
I can't stop thinking about someone and it's driving me crazy! I've never been attracted to someone so much in my life (on every level, not just physically) and he obviously feels the same, that's very apparent. But for reasons I'm not going to go into, it can't happen, or at least it shouldn't. I just am finding it really difficult to put him out of my mind, especially as I know he wants something to happen between us too. If anything does happen, it might not be yet for a while.Any advice would be much appreciated.
I feel for you but please explain why it can't happen.
No, it's not infatuation because it's not a crush, i.e it's reciprocated. I don't mean I think about him every waking second, just that I do quite often.
SamTheMan
I feel for you but please explain why it can't happen.
Yeah, can't really cos I've not gone anonymous!! Suffice to say it's not cos he's married or anything like that
Okay, being brave here. This should explain why:
http://thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=193868&highlight=my+lecturer
http://thestudentroom.co.uk/showthread.php?t=193868&highlight=my+lecturer
^ Yeah i know, easier said than done though.
go for it!! 
I'm not entirely sure as to the technicalities with lecturer/student relationships. I always assumed it was the same idea as that of the teacher/student, but maybe slightly more relaxed.
I think you need to confront him about this. I don't think you're reading the signs wrong, but to save any embarrassment or to just generally clear things up you might want to talk to him about it. This will probably be very difficult, as it will require immense courage on your behalf.
You asked "How do I stop", but sadly I don't think you should try to force yourself out of love. If you genuinely feel that way for him, and believe him to feel the same way, then I don't think you should try to repress your feelings, as it will only cause you a great deal of heartache in the future, and the eternal "If I had done this..".
Of course with relationships where one party is seen as being of a higher authority than the other, problems can conceivably occur. There is the issue with higher bodies finding out and not being so keen on it. Your peers might also find out, and rumours could spread. Also because at work he is naturally higher than the students, your relationship could have a tendency to not be entirely equal. You are essentially still his student, and it would be hard to go from an equal relationship with mutual respect back to your lectures where he is seen as above the pupils.
Try to talk to him about it, even if just to work out where you stand and what his feelings are.
Good luck!
I think you need to confront him about this. I don't think you're reading the signs wrong, but to save any embarrassment or to just generally clear things up you might want to talk to him about it. This will probably be very difficult, as it will require immense courage on your behalf.
You asked "How do I stop", but sadly I don't think you should try to force yourself out of love. If you genuinely feel that way for him, and believe him to feel the same way, then I don't think you should try to repress your feelings, as it will only cause you a great deal of heartache in the future, and the eternal "If I had done this..".
Of course with relationships where one party is seen as being of a higher authority than the other, problems can conceivably occur. There is the issue with higher bodies finding out and not being so keen on it. Your peers might also find out, and rumours could spread. Also because at work he is naturally higher than the students, your relationship could have a tendency to not be entirely equal. You are essentially still his student, and it would be hard to go from an equal relationship with mutual respect back to your lectures where he is seen as above the pupils.
Try to talk to him about it, even if just to work out where you stand and what his feelings are.
Good luck!
Kill them. It's your only option. It's you or them.
Pretty Boy
lol. i agree. this girl sounds silly.
Thanks for that wholly innacurate snap judgement!
dump your boyfriend (as that can be the only reason y not to) and go out with him.
I'd be really weary about starting anything, even if the feeling is mutual, as his job may be on the line if the relationship gets found out, although i'm not entirely sure on how tutor/student relations are dealt with.
Its an awful feeling liking someone so much and knowing that theres obstacles in the way, but you really need to sort things out with him. As you said the feelings mutual, chances are hes feeling the same way as you, and is scared for anything to happen as the circumstances are less than conventional.
Good luck
Its an awful feeling liking someone so much and knowing that theres obstacles in the way, but you really need to sort things out with him. As you said the feelings mutual, chances are hes feeling the same way as you, and is scared for anything to happen as the circumstances are less than conventional.
Good luck
Kittennffc
I'd be really weary about starting anything, even if the feeling is mutual, as his job may be on the line if the relationship gets found out, although i'm not entirely sure on how tutor/student relations are dealt with.
Its an awful feeling liking someone so much and knowing that theres obstacles in the way, but you really need to sort things out with him. As you said the feelings mutual, chances are hes feeling the same way as you, and is scared for anything to happen as the circumstances are less than conventional.
Good luck
Its an awful feeling liking someone so much and knowing that theres obstacles in the way, but you really need to sort things out with him. As you said the feelings mutual, chances are hes feeling the same way as you, and is scared for anything to happen as the circumstances are less than conventional.
Good luck
Thank you, that's really sweet. It's just so annoying, it's all so up in the air. There's so much tension and so much that's not being said whenever I see him..it's doing my bloody head in!
Bohemianthinker
Kill them. It's your only option. It's you or them.
Yes.... but the weapons of choice require debate... I suggest peanut butter. The lethal dosage is 4 table spoons consumed at once. After 30 seconds of attempting to swallow the jaw will become tired... at that point you can simply stab them... rendering the intial attack somewhat pointless! I'm a genius.
Yeah, I can imagine! Do you meet up with him or just seem him around lectures/seminars?
I bet the main thing thats annoying you is the not knowing, and it all creating this will-it? wont-it? thing in your head. I would strongly advise, no matter how hard it is, to meet up in a place where there won't be any chance of distractions, so you can focus on getting the situation sorted out.
I bet the main thing thats annoying you is the not knowing, and it all creating this will-it? wont-it? thing in your head. I would strongly advise, no matter how hard it is, to meet up in a place where there won't be any chance of distractions, so you can focus on getting the situation sorted out.
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