The Student Room Group

Worried for my friend

cHi everyboddyyy
Im worried for my friend
Shes been seeing a lad for 1year and 4 months, and they got engaged with 4motnhs, hes a black lad (21) from Africa, which i do not have a problem with, and my friend is 17 (who is white). Ive met him once, in that whole time theyve been a couple, despite the thousands of times everybody has invited him out, and ive asked her to let me see him again ... he just doesnt want it
Anyway this is the problem .. theres something not quite right about him i know it and so does her other best friend ... hes been back to Africa 3 times for 10weeks at a time in 1 year, he doesnt wana see her friends, he got engaged to her after 4 months, his ex gf keeps ringing him and saying that his kid needs him .. he tells her that shes mental. Also 1 time when he said he was in Africa, he rang her mobile of an english number despite being "in africa". And she said oh it must be a mistake.
She loves him so much and doesnt know how we feel about it .. if we metion it to her shel go mad and fall out with us .. i dont want that as weve all been best friends for 14years.
We think that he wants her to have his Visa to be able to live here, hes married, or hes got a kid (like his ex said lol)
Reply 1
Your friend is clearly defective. Get a new one.
Reply 2
Your friend is clearly defective. Get a new one.


Thats a great help .. Thanks! God some people!! tutut
Reply 3
tell the friend. They probabaly wont believe you at first, once she's been told she'll most likely start noticing the little things you have noticed. If she gets mad at you, she'll probally come crawling back when she realises what has happened.
Reply 4
tell the friend. They probabaly wont believe you at first, once she's been told she'll most likely start noticing the little things you have noticed. If she gets mad at you, she'll probally come crawling back when she realises what has happened


Yeah thanks .. but shes gona be soo hurt in the process if what we feel is true
Yes but that's better than her marrying him and giving him one of our passports. No offence but he obviously doesnt deserve her love let alone to live in this country. It happend to a friend of mine, theyve just had the divorce finalised and he got half of her stuff which is totally unfair. Even if he isn't after citizenship, something in this relationship is clearly wrong. Short of getting someone he doesnt know to set him up there isn't much you can do. But she probably is questioning it already. If she wants to get married tell her to put it off for a while just to make sure, if he is happy to wait another 2yrs then he's more likely for real..........good luck
Reply 6
Anonymous
Also 1 time when he said he was in Africa, he rang her mobile of an english number despite being "in africa". And she said oh it must be a mistake.[/quote]
Actually, there's an explaination for that. When your mobile is called from an international line, it has to be forwarded, so you won't see the number from Africa, just that of the third party that's routing your call.

It does seem a bit odd though that he's refusing to see you or other friends. If they were to marry, he'd have to get used to you being around anyway. If you can't interrogate him about it, you should get your friend to, and definitely to make sure the marriage isn't rushed.