I'm bigger than my boyfriend
Ok so me and this guy get on really really well and he says all the right things to make me feel pretty and beautiful and try and say it doesn't matter and i feel bad that i am even thinking so shallow about this.
But yeah, i think i want to marry him
i'm a short girl like 5ft 3 and he is like 5 ft 3 or 4, and he is SO skinny and im like a size 12, so yes i need to lose about a stone of weight...
I am attracted to him its not that, its just sometimes if we go out with his friends , i feel really ugly and i feel like they would be judging us as i am bigger than him
When making out an stuff i find it really awkward to be on top of him, and i feel like i can't do normal things like sit on my bf's lap
When i hug him, like i see his waist and i just feel like why can't i be this slim
He is really lovely and has never said anything apart from jokingly once said my thighs are big (compared to him, they are like and elephant ) and when i started my exams and started going out less he said make sure you get out and exercise as well as study, (he probably meant it in a caring way but i think he must have also been hinting at he doesnt want me to get bigger over the exam period lol)
SO yeah i dont know just after comments i guess, it makes me feel so crap about myself, especially as my self confidence has never been tht great anyway.. but i really have been improving it over the past few years, but being with him just makes me feel crap again...
Thanks lol
But yeah, i think i want to marry him
i'm a short girl like 5ft 3 and he is like 5 ft 3 or 4, and he is SO skinny and im like a size 12, so yes i need to lose about a stone of weight...
I am attracted to him its not that, its just sometimes if we go out with his friends , i feel really ugly and i feel like they would be judging us as i am bigger than him
When making out an stuff i find it really awkward to be on top of him, and i feel like i can't do normal things like sit on my bf's lap
When i hug him, like i see his waist and i just feel like why can't i be this slim
He is really lovely and has never said anything apart from jokingly once said my thighs are big (compared to him, they are like and elephant
) and when i started my exams and started going out less he said make sure you get out and exercise as well as study, (he probably meant it in a caring way but i think he must have also been hinting at he doesnt want me to get bigger over the exam period lol)SO yeah i dont know
just after comments i guess, it makes me feel so crap about myself, especially as my self confidence has never been tht great anyway.. but i really have been improving it over the past few years, but being with him just makes me feel crap again...Thanks lol
There's not really much to say here. Your boyfriend doesn't seem to have an issue, it's you that does. If you can't be bothered to lose the weight, you have to either accept the fact that you won't be able to sit on his lap and do the normal things, and potentially be judged, or you'll have to find a new boyfriend who's bigger than you. For the record, I don't think it's fair that you'd be judged for being bigger, but it may happen or at least you'll still feel like they judge you. Otherwise, just lose the weight, keep the boyfriend, and feel happy with your new body and increased confidence.
You need to just get some confidence. Size 12 isn't big. I had a boyfriend who was really skinny and it made me feel awful at the time as well, I always thought people would think it was odd but when we broke up I realised how much my friends and other people were making fun of him for being so skinny! So it wasn't me that the comments we aimed at! Got my confidence back after that lol
Original post by Ilikecake
Please dont marry him and have short children, it's not fair on them.
What's wrong with short people? They are awesome
OP, I think you need to learn to love yourself and accept who you are. I'm actually bigger then my boyfriend and tiny too
But he doesnt mind. He actually thinks I'm 'normal' weight when I'm not. Soo.. I think its all in your head. I think you should talk to your boyfriend about it. So he understands how your feeling.
But he prob doesnt find your weight a problem since he's already with you!
There's not really much to say here. Your boyfriend doesn't seem to have an issue, it's you that does.
Original post by Ilikecake
Please dont marry him and have short children, it's not fair on them.
hahah you meanie
Im 5ft 11 my boyfriend is 5ft 8 at first I was so close to not going out with him because I was scared of what people would think, my family have an issue with it but i dont give a ****, he makes me happy hes treated me better than any other guy and i realised is it worth being with a 'tall' socially accetable guy who i am unhappy with or the short guy who treats me amazing and who im in love with , its the same with your size btw a size 12 is slim ! but **** what everybody else thinks dont give him up !
OK first off, size 12 is not big, although i suppose the same size can appear different depending on how you're built. I'm not an expert on womenswear. I'll answer assuming that you really could do with losing that one stone.
If he's a good boyfriend, which he sounds like, he would never ever ask you to lose weight, even if he was thinking it. I was going out with a girl for a year and a half and she put on a bit of weight over that time. Not that much, but noticeable. She worried about it and would occassionally say "i'm so fat" and that sort of thing. Even though I was thinking that I would like her back at the size she was when we met, I would never ever say that. What I said was, "If you want to lose weight for you and how you feel about yourself, then by all means, go ahead, but don't think you need to do it for me. I think you look great." And she did look great at that size. But she could have looked better. I just would never say that, and neither would any good/sane boyfriend.
So yeah, I would guess that he likes the way you look now, and is perfectly happy with you, but wouldn't object if you were to take off that spare stone you mention. But you need to take the initiative with that, because while a girl can pester her boyfriend/husband to lose weight, any boyfriend worth having would never mention it when it's the other way around.
If he's a good boyfriend, which he sounds like, he would never ever ask you to lose weight, even if he was thinking it. I was going out with a girl for a year and a half and she put on a bit of weight over that time. Not that much, but noticeable. She worried about it and would occassionally say "i'm so fat" and that sort of thing. Even though I was thinking that I would like her back at the size she was when we met, I would never ever say that. What I said was, "If you want to lose weight for you and how you feel about yourself, then by all means, go ahead, but don't think you need to do it for me. I think you look great." And she did look great at that size. But she could have looked better. I just would never say that, and neither would any good/sane boyfriend.
So yeah, I would guess that he likes the way you look now, and is perfectly happy with you, but wouldn't object if you were to take off that spare stone you mention. But you need to take the initiative with that, because while a girl can pester her boyfriend/husband to lose weight, any boyfriend worth having would never mention it when it's the other way around.
(edited 11 years ago)
Tall girls are great. I'm 6-0 and I've been with several girls taller than me...including a 6-5 black Amazon. it all works well, just find the groove. It's great for finding out what people really think and exposing their prejudices sooner rather than later.
All I would say really is Stuff what other people think, if they want to be pathetic and judge people, couples, individuals etc. on the way they look and not get to know them first then shame on them but let them get on with it we all know who's the better person.
As for the weight and size... size 12 is not big at all! Trust me, I may only be 10/12 depending where I buy clothes from but I love my body and nobody will effect my thoughts on it, so really do what you think is best, if you want to lose a little weight for yourself and your confidence levels then go for it, but don't do it for a guy (even though your boyfriend sounds amazingly nice and sounds like he likes you for who you are).
The size difference between you and your boyfriend doesn't seem to bother him and shouldn't you either, ignore what society says and get on with your lovely life, After all if I went with society I would not have my wonderful boyfriend that I do now (he's considerably shorter than me btw) and tbh out of all my ex's and him, he is the best i've had and wouldn't change anything.
So basically in 2 words... **** Society!!
As for the weight and size... size 12 is not big at all! Trust me, I may only be 10/12 depending where I buy clothes from but I love my body and nobody will effect my thoughts on it, so really do what you think is best, if you want to lose a little weight for yourself and your confidence levels then go for it, but don't do it for a guy (even though your boyfriend sounds amazingly nice and sounds like he likes you for who you are).
The size difference between you and your boyfriend doesn't seem to bother him and shouldn't you either, ignore what society says and get on with your lovely life, After all if I went with society I would not have my wonderful boyfriend that I do now (he's considerably shorter than me btw) and tbh out of all my ex's and him, he is the best i've had and wouldn't change anything.
So basically in 2 words... **** Society!!
Generally I agree with most people: it don't matter unless you MAKE it matter.
BUT
1. If you are overweight for your height (I'm size 10-12 at 5"8, so a lot taler than you!), and it bothers you, then do something about it. Join the gym and start running and you'll look and feel better, so just do it for yourself.
2. To be honest, that exercise comment from him is a bit not cool. That would hurt my feelings too. Let's hope it's not the beginning of a string of future comments from him about your weight, although again, if it bothers you that much you'll sort it, won't you?
BUT
1. If you are overweight for your height (I'm size 10-12 at 5"8, so a lot taler than you!), and it bothers you, then do something about it. Join the gym and start running and you'll look and feel better, so just do it for yourself.
2. To be honest, that exercise comment from him is a bit not cool. That would hurt my feelings too. Let's hope it's not the beginning of a string of future comments from him about your weight, although again, if it bothers you that much you'll sort it, won't you?
Original post by Anonymous
Im 5ft 11 my boyfriend is 5ft 8 at first I was so close to not going out with him because I was scared of what people would think, my family have an issue with it but i dont give a ****, he makes me happy hes treated me better than any other guy and i realised is it worth being with a 'tall' socially accetable guy who i am unhappy with or the short guy who treats me amazing and who im in love with , its the same with your size btw a size 12 is slim ! but **** what everybody else thinks dont give him up !
Your 'family have an issue with it'? With him being 5ft 8?
That is straight-up bizarre.
Original post by Anonymous
Ok so me and this guy get on really really well and he says all the right things to make me feel pretty and beautiful and try and say it doesn't matter and i feel bad that i am even thinking so shallow about this.
But yeah, i think i want to marry him
i'm a short girl like 5ft 3 and he is like 5 ft 3 or 4, and he is SO skinny and im like a size 12, so yes i need to lose about a stone of weight...
I am attracted to him its not that, its just sometimes if we go out with his friends , i feel really ugly and i feel like they would be judging us as i am bigger than him
When making out an stuff i find it really awkward to be on top of him, and i feel like i can't do normal things like sit on my bf's lap
When i hug him, like i see his waist and i just feel like why can't i be this slim
He is really lovely and has never said anything apart from jokingly once said my thighs are big (compared to him, they are like and elephant ) and when i started my exams and started going out less he said make sure you get out and exercise as well as study, (he probably meant it in a caring way but i think he must have also been hinting at he doesnt want me to get bigger over the exam period lol)
SO yeah i dont know just after comments i guess, it makes me feel so crap about myself, especially as my self confidence has never been tht great anyway.. but i really have been improving it over the past few years, but being with him just makes me feel crap again...
Thanks lol
But yeah, i think i want to marry him
i'm a short girl like 5ft 3 and he is like 5 ft 3 or 4, and he is SO skinny and im like a size 12, so yes i need to lose about a stone of weight...
I am attracted to him its not that, its just sometimes if we go out with his friends , i feel really ugly and i feel like they would be judging us as i am bigger than him
When making out an stuff i find it really awkward to be on top of him, and i feel like i can't do normal things like sit on my bf's lap
When i hug him, like i see his waist and i just feel like why can't i be this slim
He is really lovely and has never said anything apart from jokingly once said my thighs are big (compared to him, they are like and elephant
) and when i started my exams and started going out less he said make sure you get out and exercise as well as study, (he probably meant it in a caring way but i think he must have also been hinting at he doesnt want me to get bigger over the exam period lol)SO yeah i dont know
just after comments i guess, it makes me feel so crap about myself, especially as my self confidence has never been tht great anyway.. but i really have been improving it over the past few years, but being with him just makes me feel crap again...Thanks lol
I bet if he had a big cock you wouldn't be making this thread.
The problem: "I'm bigger than my boyfriend, I care about it, it's making my self esteem worse. I want to get slimmer"
The Solution: Do some exercise and eat healthier.
Coming on the forum and feeling sorry for yourself wont solve your problem. We all have problems in life, you need to start actively doing something about them if you want them to go away.
When people want to pass exams and get a good job, they don't complain that its hard, they do the work that needs to be done.
Unless people saying "it doesn't matter" helps you, then do what you need to do instead of talking about it.
Sorry for being a bit rude but its the truth.
The Solution: Do some exercise and eat healthier.
Coming on the forum and feeling sorry for yourself wont solve your problem. We all have problems in life, you need to start actively doing something about them if you want them to go away.
When people want to pass exams and get a good job, they don't complain that its hard, they do the work that needs to be done.
Unless people saying "it doesn't matter" helps you, then do what you need to do instead of talking about it.
Sorry for being a bit rude but its the truth.
Thank you to everyone for your replies 
i can't go and reply to all of them so ill give most of you a postitive rating instead 
i know im not like majorly obese, and hugely unattractive, but i am overweight for my height and i'd quite like to go back to a comfortable size 10
He is a really lovely boyfriend and adores everything about me, but im sure he would "prefer" to have me slimmer, just how i'd prefer him to put on a bit of muscle and me a lot taller than me... and so i guess its just up to me to lose the weight and feel better about myself.
Its losing the weight that is hard, with exams and recovering from mild depression, it can be hard to motivate myself sometimes..
Thank you all again xxx
i can't go and reply to all of them so ill give most of you a postitive rating instead i know im not like majorly obese, and hugely unattractive, but i am overweight for my height and i'd quite like to go back to a comfortable size 10
He is a really lovely boyfriend and adores everything about me, but im sure he would "prefer" to have me slimmer, just how i'd prefer him to put on a bit of muscle and me a lot taller than me... and so i guess its just up to me to lose the weight and feel better about myself.
Its losing the weight that is hard, with exams and recovering from mild depression, it can be hard to motivate myself sometimes..
Thank you all again
xxxQuick Reply
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