The Student Room Group

Cant get a boyfriend because I look young

Im 24 years old, female and have never had a boyfriend because apparantly I look 12 years old. Im petite in build and Ive been told I have a 'childish looking tone' to my face. I get ID'd sometimes for lottery tickets etc. Ive tried to have really short hair to try and look older but its not worked. I saw a guy who i used to know at uni and he said that he found me attractive personality wise but that he was hesitant about hanging round as he was worried what people might think. It probably explains why I dont have many friends either.

Ive been to a pub about twice in my life and you know how older men look around when someone walks in, well they did that and one of them shouted out 'bloody hell look at her shes about 10 years old'. They looked and I heard one of them say 'they are getting younger in pubs these days'. People say that its not my height (im about 5ft) its my face that looks really young. I think i have an oldish look to my face and people agree but they say that when they first see me they assume im about 12 or 13 and that its probably because i dont wear make up. Im flat chested too with boyish fairly muscular figure. I actually do wear make up i put on eyeliner, foundation and blusher everyday so thats its slight but noticable.

Im not into heavy makeup or jewellry at all in fact i should have been a guy i only really wear jeans and t shirts. Just wated advice. How can i get a boyfriend (who isnt a peodophile before someone says it) if I only look 12??
Reply 1
Original post by Anonymous
Im 24 years old, female and have never had a boyfriend because apparantly I look 12 years old. Im petite in build and Ive been told I have a 'childish looking tone' to my face. I get ID'd sometimes for lottery tickets etc. Ive tried to have really short hair to try and look older but its not worked. I saw a guy who i used to know at uni and he said that he found me attractive personality wise but that he was hesitant about hanging round as he was worried what people might think. It probably explains why I dont have many friends either.

Ive been to a pub about twice in my life and you know how older men look around when someone walks in, well they did that and one of them shouted out 'bloody hell look at her shes about 10 years old'. They looked and I heard one of them say 'they are getting younger in pubs these days'. People say that its not my height (im about 5ft) its my face that looks really young. I think i have an oldish look to my face and people agree but they say that when they first see me they assume im about 12 or 13 and that its probably because i dont wear make up. Im flat chested too with boyish fairly muscular figure. I actually do wear make up i put on eyeliner, foundation and blusher everyday so thats its slight but noticable.

Im not into heavy makeup or jewellry at all in fact i should have been a guy i only really wear jeans and t shirts. Just wated advice. How can i get a boyfriend (who isnt a peodophile before someone says it) if I only look 12??


how do you know thats the reason?
im a little puzzled because im 20, 5ft tall, and get id-ed for everythign (once even trying to buy a 12 DVD from tescos... :angry: ) but i have never had someone say they werent attracted to me because i look young

if im honest saying you "should have been a guy" probably doesnt help

maybe you could wear your make up in a slightyl different way instead of wearing more/less
or trying doing activities more associated with people your age (i.e. frequenting the pub)
I got ID'd for buying MW3, which made me 'dafuq?' face quite hard seeing as I haven't been ID'd for other things like buying booze or clubs and bars in ages. I think I had facial hair at the time to.

Handed over my drivers licence which stated my membership of the mid-20 club and laughed.


OP, without a photo we can't really comment, but there are probably things you can do to offset it, you're not the first person to look young for their age and won't be the last, people learn to deal with it and make it their own.
Don't wear just jeans and t-shirts, maybe wear something more feminine? (I'm a hypocrite - I practically live in jeans and t-shirts, but I don't look young so I suppose it makes no difference to me).

Also, perhaps wear a little more makeup.

You seem to already know that what you wear, and the fact that you wear only a little bit of makeup, is contributing to you looking young, yet you seem reluctant to change these things. You can lead a horse to water as they say, but you can't make him drink! We can give you advice, but would you follow it?

As others have said, photos would be beneficial here so we can assist.
Reply 4
I'm also 24 and youthful looking. I got ID'd for night nurse yesterday. I get people telling me how young I look all the frigging time. It's just my face/build. I don't let it bother me, as I will have the last laugh when everyone enters their thirties (tired cliche, but true). However, the 'oooh you look soooooo young!!!' comments are more acute when I wear flat shoes. I'm not suggesting you wear heels permanently, but I thought it worth a mention. Also, when someone speaks to me in a patronising way which would indicate they assume me to be in my teens, I find it pleasing to use my over-the-top posho phone voice on them, preferably with obnoxiously long and unnecessary words. Again, that's just me.

As lame as it sounds, everyone has things they dislike about themselves. There's not really a whole lot you can do about it except EMBRACE your youthfulness. Not very helpful advice I know, but bar having a face transplant and/or taking up heavy smoking to encourage the wrinkles, the only course of action is to try and be happy being you.

P.S. I do have a boyfriend who is two years older than me. Fairly sure he's not a paedophile.
Dont worry about the ID thing, this seems to just be bored jealous shop cashier's way of undermining you somehow, I am absolutely huge and 26 and I still get ID'd for lottery tickets occasionally, which is a pain because I am so used to not being ID'd that I dont carry my ID with me!
Original post by Anonymous
Im 24 years old, female and have never had a boyfriend because apparantly I look 12 years old. Im petite in build and Ive been told I have a 'childish looking tone' to my face. I get ID'd sometimes for lottery tickets etc. Ive tried to have really short hair to try and look older but its not worked. I saw a guy who i used to know at uni and he said that he found me attractive personality wise but that he was hesitant about hanging round as he was worried what people might think. It probably explains why I dont have many friends either.

Ive been to a pub about twice in my life and you know how older men look around when someone walks in, well they did that and one of them shouted out 'bloody hell look at her shes about 10 years old'. They looked and I heard one of them say 'they are getting younger in pubs these days'. People say that its not my height (im about 5ft) its my face that looks really young. I think i have an oldish look to my face and people agree but they say that when they first see me they assume im about 12 or 13 and that its probably because i dont wear make up. Im flat chested too with boyish fairly muscular figure. I actually do wear make up i put on eyeliner, foundation and blusher everyday so thats its slight but noticable.

Im not into heavy makeup or jewellry at all in fact i should have been a guy i only really wear jeans and t shirts. Just wated advice. How can i get a boyfriend (who isnt a peodophile before someone says it) if I only look 12??


http://www.extrapetite.com/2010/05/reader-request-how-to-look-older-in.html

This is kinda geared toward Asian girls but it still has some good tips on how to dress a bit older. There's probably loads of YouTube tutorials on how to look older with makeup if you want to do that too.


This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App
Reply 7
i look young and get id'd all the time but that's never been a problem when it comes to guys? maybe dress a bit more feminine :smile: sorry not very helpful lol :smile:
I look young, it annoys me sometimes but other times it saves me money because I get child prices even though I'm almost 22 so that's pretty good lol just depends what mood I'm in. I'm not quite 12 but I can pass as under 16 and I am guaranteed to be id'd everywhere I go!
It's never been a problem with guys though.. if you look young you have the "cute" factor lol if you're with a guy that is ashamed of you looking so young then you shouldn't be with him because you deserve better :smile: The right guy will come along
Reply 9
I would recommend just growing out your hair. Hair is perhaps one of the most obvious symbols of femininity a girl has to offer. Having very short hair does nothing to dispel the masculine traits you are already bussing around. There's every possibility that guys aren't interested because you remind them of an 8-year old boy.

So yes, my advice is grow out your hair.
being honest.. I'd say to not rush into finding a guy - find time for yourself first! meet new people and chill! Guys will come to you if you've got the confidence :smile: Besides, a great man will not look at you on the outside, but past imperfections

good luck x
Reply 11
Original post by Calpurnia
I would recommend just growing out your hair. Hair is perhaps one of the most obvious symbols of femininity a girl has to offer. Having very short hair does nothing to dispel the masculine traits you are already bussing around. There's every possibility that guys aren't interested because you remind them of an 8-year old boy.

So yes, my advice is grow out your hair.


When my hair is grown out I look like a witch plus its very unmanagable and frizzy despite efforts. I do seem to get marginally more attention (like 1 guy a year potentially interested lol) when it is tied back, so i cut it short. When I think my hair looks ok someone makes a comment liek my hair looks rough Ive been told that my hair is bad so many times. People tell me that im 'natural' because i dont do my hair and makeup etc but I spend loads of time on my hair (straightening it ... people say it looks much better straight) and do wear a bit of makeup. My family say that short hair suits me and makes me look older but then yea its guys opinions that matter.
i'm chinese and 26. i look really young, like a teenager. now i'm getting older, the best moment was when i went to the cinema and the guy serving me said i looked 14. i replied, seeing as i look 14, why don't you sell me a teen ticket then...and he did! i digress...

that website is amazing - i wish i knew about it when i was younger.

i don't think looking young has been a turn off for guys though. if they like your personality and you click, it shouldn't be a problem. it's probably a confidence problem rather than due to looks.
Original post by Archengsculp
being honest.. I'd say to not rush into finding a guy - find time for yourself first! meet new people and chill! Guys will come to you if you've got the confidence :smile: Besides, a great man will not look at you on the outside, but past imperfections

good luck x


This is what I should've posted really. This is much better than my suggestion for superficial change.

Original post by Anonymous
When my hair is grown out I look like a witch plus its very unmanagable and frizzy despite efforts. I do seem to get marginally more attention (like 1 guy a year potentially interested lol) when it is tied back, so i cut it short. When I think my hair looks ok someone makes a comment liek my hair looks rough Ive been told that my hair is bad so many times. People tell me that im 'natural' because i dont do my hair and makeup etc but I spend loads of time on my hair (straightening it ... people say it looks much better straight) and do wear a bit of makeup. My family say that short hair suits me and makes me look older but then yea its guys opinions that matter.


I should've seen this coming, there's not really anywhere to go from this without you posting pictures or whatever because it's all subjective.

Pay more attention to the other post I quoted here; it's legitimately good advice if you're looking for something serious.
Reply 14
Original post by Anonymous #1
Im 24 years old, female and have never had a boyfriend because apparantly I look 12 years old. Im petite in build and Ive been told I have a 'childish looking tone' to my face. I get ID'd sometimes for lottery tickets etc. Ive tried to have really short hair to try and look older but its not worked. I saw a guy who i used to know at uni and he said that he found me attractive personality wise but that he was hesitant about hanging round as he was worried what people might think. It probably explains why I dont have many friends either.

Ive been to a pub about twice in my life and you know how older men look around when someone walks in, well they did that and one of them shouted out 'bloody hell look at her shes about 10 years old'. They looked and I heard one of them say 'they are getting younger in pubs these days'. People say that its not my height (im about 5ft) its my face that looks really young. I think i have an oldish look to my face and people agree but they say that when they first see me they assume im about 12 or 13 and that its probably because i dont wear make up. Im flat chested too with boyish fairly muscular figure. I actually do wear make up i put on eyeliner, foundation and blusher everyday so thats its slight but noticable.

Im not into heavy makeup or jewellry at all in fact i should have been a guy i only really wear jeans and t shirts. Just wated advice. How can i get a boyfriend (who isnt a peodophile before someone says it) if I only look 12??
Hi I think I have the same problem as you. When I meet a woman for a date they all ways tell me I look to young and look like a boy they don't believe I'm 46. Then they never ask me on a condense date I'm 46 I think this is why I can't get a girlfriend.

Latest

Trending

Trending