Unrequited Love

I really need some help on how to get over a guy who I care so very deeply about but only takes a very polite general, purely platonic interest in me. I've just turned twenty and feel like a 10 yr old in posting this thread, but just feel so miserable atm. I'd give anything in the world to be with him but it's not going to happen. Alternatively, does anyone know ways of getting the romatic attention of someone who until now has only liked you platonically??
Any help, however small, will be most appreciated. I feel so sad :frown:

Reply 1

lil_sweetie

**hug** I'm in your situation too...doesn't feel good does it! All I can really say is if you want to get over him, find someone else to focus on and if you want him to notice you in a romantic way, tell him how you feel. He'll be flattered. Sorry that's not very helpful!

Reply 2

Schmokie Dragon

I was in that situation. Totaly, painfully in love for about two years. He treated me like a friendly associate UNTIL I told him how I felt (quite be accident, I thought he already knew as someone else said they had blabbed to him). When I told him, he said he was flattered but our friendship nose dived. It was the most awful two years of my life.

Your only hope is to be yourself around him. Dont "stalk" him and dont put on a face. If he likes you, he will come after you. If he doesnt, thats life I'm afraid. But in the end, you cant make people attracted to you.

Reply 3

white_haired_wizard

It's a difficult situation...but you hear the saying "Best to have loved and lost than not having loved at all". Something along that line....hmm sorry i'm waffling....it usually gets to the point that you can't take it anymore and that you will have to tell him your feelings, of course, easier said than done, but you reach breaking point at some point down the line...if he's a real, true friend, you're friendship should not be over if he isn't interested , he should take being asked out by you...as being flattering...and nothing else but. It may make things odd for a while after, uneasy but if you are friends, maybe you can somehow laugh off/away the pain....

I was in this situation two years back - at the time i thought it was love with a girl my age in first year at university - took me 3-4 weeks to conjure up the courage to ask her out....and she said no, i'd forgotten that she'd mentioned she had a love interest with someone else back home...so i c ocked that one up.

With you, you seem certain that he doesn't have any interest in you of the kind you have in him? The difference with me, is that i thought i was seeing interest emanating from this girl, i heard comments she made about me, comments i wasn't supposed to hear, and generally she was/is just a goddess in every way. Just don't change yourself, be yourself around him as other posters have advised...sorry for rambling.

Reply 4

PinkPigeon

Unrequited love is awful and although it's a cliche, time is the only healer as far as I know. I had it really bad between about October- January and I'm gradually getting less and less, I think about him hardly ever now but we also hardly ever talk...which certainly helps- don't know if that's an option for you?
As others have said, going out, meeting new people is also a real help, I've become involved in a new group of people, a lot more lively and sociable and it's really stopped me from sitting thinking about the guy.

Reply 5

Anonymous #2

How do you get over unrequited love if you see him almost everyday and work with him? I'm sort of in the same situation but I've have casual sex with the guy. I asked him out, he replied with "I need time to think about what he wants." What to do, what to do? Time is a healer but one has to be patient...