bf finished with me

ok so after six weeks bf finished with me, despite i feel that we have this immense intellectual connection etc and just a few weeks ago him saying i was the first girl he had genuine affections for. it was technically a long distance rship as i'm at university, although he did visit me and seemed really keen but despite this he said the distance wasn't the reason more that it was because i wasn't "confrontational " enough.. and always trying to please him (not in a sexual way as i declined to have sex with him) can i have other interpretations on this? what reasons can you think of for him doing a 180? he also said he had issues with intimacy and expressing affection for people, but this didn't seem a problem earlier on in the r-ship.. thoughts please !

Reply 1

Fluent in Lies

{ignore}Possibly you were too pushy? He might have felt under pressure. I'm not sure, really you need to taok it thorugh with him and find out what he means by 'confrontational'. Did you challenge everything he said?{/ignore}

Reply 2

TommyD

Original post by Fluent &#953

Possibly you were too pushy? He might have felt under pressure. I'm not sure, really you need to taok it thorugh with him and find out what he means by 'confrontational'. Did you challenge everything he said?

Didnt she say not confrontational enough?

Well theres a million reasons why hes done a 180. Hard to tell, and hes unlikely to give straight answers if asked.

Just tell yourself you'll never know, because you probly wont find out. But then if he says he has problems with intimacy and expressing affection for people, then i guess maybe thats your explanation. For him he just wasnt ready and it didnt feel right.

Try not to think too much into it. You'll run circles around yourself trying to figure it and theres really no point.

Reply 3

Fluent in Lies

TommyD

Didnt she say not confrontational enough?

Yeah.

Reply 4

TommyD

Original post by Fluent &#953

Yeah.

Sorry i sounded a bit blunt. Im tired and writing randomly :p:

Reply 5

Fluent in Lies

Hey - I can't read - I wouldn't worry about random typing :biggrin:

Reply 6

Jenna Leicester

Hi hun,

First off, **big hug**
I know exactly what you are going through, my boyfriend did it to me with the first relationship we had. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason as to why, he just didn't want to carry it on anymore.
Sometimes, it just doesnt feel 'right'. I know it sounds completely cliche and it wont help at the moment but it was only 6 weeks, and he may have had some issues you don't know about (you have mentioned the issues, but how much do you know about them?)
When my bf and I got back together after a 6 week split, we had a big talk and it turned out that he just didnt feel ready to start something serious. Maybe your bf thought that it could have turned into something long-term, and he just wasn't ready?
If you give him some time, he may come back and want to try again. Mine did. Hope this helps.