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What You Felt When He/she Broke Your Heart

i just wanted to talk about something that has bothered me for a long time. can i just say first that i never dreamt you could feel so hurt from the result of a relationship...to the point where you feel you dont want another one, and cant believe all the effort it takes to make it work. maybe its because i had a bad experience in the last relationship i had, previously i'd always been the one to break it off, not wanting such a serious longterm relationship so young. but then when i finally found someone, i never understood the extent of how i could feel. i didnt know why i was attracted to them..i had known them for a long time and never felt anything before. but it went from this attraction thing to a whole relationship where there was the most amazing chemistry i have ever felt, all he had to do was touch me. and at the same time it was the most emotional rollercoaster, where we were so diiferent and he needed more relationships behind him. i guess i never understood how much i liked this guy until i wasnt with him. i never knew it could take so long to get over someone and i often wonder whether you ever will. nothing feels the same and all you want is that feeling again, but you want it returned. if i was hurt so much by this heartbreak how would i ever survive a relationship where we both felt the same way. i find myself listening to songs and thinking, that is what i feel. does heartbreAK EVER go away...and how did you feel, and what did you do, and do guys have a clue how girls feel....

Reply 1

Mrs_F

15

Yes it goes away - you do meet someone else, it can just take a very long time.

Reply 2

BlackHawk

17

Yes it will go away. If you meet someone and spend the rest of your life with them then you won't even remember the past relationships.

Reply 3

Segat1

16

yes. it does. but it takes a while.

Reply 4

Monkey_Maiden

11

Hi I felt exactly the same when my bf dumped me before xmas, he was my first proper relationship and although I had had other bfs, I've never been treated the way he treated me, He loved me so much and cared about me, protected me etc. I know I'm annoying but he didn't seem to care and we did everything together. He was always there for me and if I needed a hug I got one whenever I wanted, he was my best friend but then he ended things :frown:

Honestly can say it was the worst pain I've ever felt and I'm still trying to get over it completely, hes stopped all contact and as well as losing a bf I've lost my best friend, the one person who understood me the most.
I know I'll meet someone else but not for a while and I'll never forget him
Sorry kinda soppy and depressing post.

Reply 5

Mrs_F

15

BlackHawk

If you meet someone and spend the rest of your life with them then you won't even remember the past relationships.

Not too sure I agree with that. I still have fond memories of the time I had with my ex - I won't just forget that relationship because I am in love with someone else. I think once someone has had that impact on you, they will always have a place in your heart.
I know if I split up with my fiance I would never forget about him - hopefully I would be able to move on with time, but the memories would always be there. (Fingers crossed that isn't going to happen though!)

Reply 6

high priestess fnord

9

BlackHawk

Yes it will go away. If you meet someone and spend the rest of your life with them then you won't even remember the past relationships.

u allways remember the past relationship and it effects your new one. hopefully in a good way cos u realise what u have.

Reply 7

Anonymous #1

OP

Monkey_Maiden

I know I'll meet someone else but not for a while and I'll never forget him
Sorry kinda soppy and depressing post.

this is what i mean. no one else ever seems to replace them...i dont know how i will ever move on and dont even know that i want to. i just want him back really...and i think i could have him, but then i cant go through all the hurt again..

Reply 8

Mrs_F

15

Anonymous

this is what i mean. no one else ever seems to replace them...i dont know how i will ever move on and dont even know that i want to. i just want him back really...and i think i could have him, but then i cant go through all the hurt again..

No don't go back - cos you will get hurt again. I have been there done that! You can move on - you shouldn't be looking for someone to REPLACE him though. The relationship is doomed before it begins if you are comparing someone to your ex. You are clearly not ready for a new relationship yet, go out with your friends and have fun. Someone else will come along when you are ready and you never know they might be the one!

If you want to PM me - feel free.

Reply 9

Anonymous #1

OP

im going to uni in september though...and i just want to spend the rest of the time here happy, and if he has changed like i think he has i reckon i could be happy. but then id have to say goodbye. life is so messed up sometimes, thank you for your help

Reply 10

Mrs_F

15

He won't have changed. You sound exactly like what I was like all those years ago lol.

Why did you split up in the first place?

Reply 11

enigma2506

I dont want to sound negative but I dont think that true heartbreak ever 'goes away' as such, it just gets easier to deal with, if its the result of true love it wont just go, buit you learn to live with it, embrace it, instead of letting it drag you down you use it to better understand yourself, I had my heart 'broken', 4 yrs ago, and for me it was serious, it very nearly destroyed me. I dont think it will ever go but it doesnt bother me any more, I wish it hadnt of happend but in a way it was a good thing.

Reply 12

Monkey_Maiden

11

enigma2506

I dont want to sound negative but I dont think that true heartbreak ever 'goes away' as such, it just gets easier to deal with, if its the result of true love it wont just go, buit you learn to live with it, embrace it, instead of letting it drag you down you use it to better understand yourself, I had my heart 'broken', 4 yrs ago, and for me it was serious, it very nearly destroyed me. I dont think it will ever go but it doesnt bother me any more, I wish it hadnt of happend but in a way it was a good thing.

You make sense :smile:

I don't think it will go away either, but the more time goes by the easier it is to handle and leave in the past.
I'm starting to kinda believe things happen for a reason

Reply 13

Anonymous #1

OP

we broke up because he couldnt return the feelings that i felt for him, or if he did feel them he cldnt handle it and needed some more experience elsewhere, think i was the first person he felt that way about and didnt really know how to deal with it. thats why i wonder if he has grown up a bit now...see he didnt cheat on me or anything, i was just hurt from the fact we had to break up cos it was the best thing for him...and i loved him i guess

Reply 14

enigma2506

Monkey_Maiden

You make sense :smile:

I don't think it will go away either, but the more time goes by the easier it is to handle and leave in the past.
I'm starting to kinda believe things happen for a reason

Hey thanks, glad somthing Ive said makes sense :smile:

.

Yeah over last few years Ive started to believe everything happens for a reason, good or bad, it all serves a purpose the key is to figure out what that purpose is.

she apologised...

Yes I don't think I will ever get over my ex splitting up with me propely, because he was such a huge part of my life, for 4 years, so all of upper school and sixth form we were together, did everything together and just loved each other. We had the most perfect relationship ever, never fought really and it's just a shame uni had to come between us. Sometimes I feel like I am getting better, but then I have these thoughts and every night I dream about him. I know the pain becomes managable....but I also know I will never forget him, because thats impossible when someone was so nice to you and was such a great friend, and still is. When you are with someone for a good 4 years then it becomes rather hard to accept it can be over...*cries* oh here we go again.

Reply 17

Kittennffc

15

I was absolutely gutted when this guy I was kind of seeing ended things; firstly because I thought he liked me as everytime we met up it was "I really like you" and he was the one who started talking to me and asking for my number, and secondly because I really, really fell for him and could honestly see us being together, thirdly because we instantly clicked and it felt like we'd known each other for ages.

I was heartbroken when he started ingoring me for no reason whatsoever, and only thought to text me saying we wanted different things and he wanted to be single after I text him asking what was going on!

It takes along time to get over someone, but you can't rush it and force yourself into being over someone. I still get a bit sad when I think this guy doesn't like me, even though I may still like him a bit, even though it all ended in like, October.

I've just realised how sad this is... :redface:

Reply 18

Schmokie Dragon

17

Breaking up is a b*tch. Thats the only was to describe it. You feel cold, empty, alone, tired and you really don't feel like you ever want to function normaly again, everything just takes too much effort. When my b.f briefly dumped me (after 1.5 years) in the summer, I was in Florida and he did it over text (from my best mate's phone!!). I did not eat for days. I just wondered about, feeling tired and alone. Anytime I smiled I regretted the moment of happiness.

But, you really do get over it. Its a looong process, but it WILL happen, even if you don't think there is a chance in hell it will. I have been there many times. Its really s**t.

Reply 19

Kittennffc

15

Oh my God, I've just realise how the guy I was speaking about in my post will grow up to look like James Nesbit. Hot. Grr, why can't I get over him?!

What You Felt When He/she Broke Your Heart

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