Playing Hard to Get

I was wondering if on the dating scene playing hard to get - ie signalling that you like someone else and then pretending that you don't like them at all in order to hopefully make them want you more is a good thing or a bad thing.

Obviously a bit of it is a bit of fun but Im talking about if you go beyond this threshold i.e. you really like someone, and they really like you, but they are constantly stand-offish to the point that you feel like just giving up and not bothering with them any more - by the way this girl does like me so I dont think its a case of her having gone off me.
(as you can probably tell this is my own personal girl trouble :wink:

)

Please someone help :frown:

should I continue to be tortured or just forget this girl I like and move on - even though she may not want me to.

Reply 1

Bob123

have i miss understood, You like a girl and she likes you yet you want to forget about her and move on. I dont get what your saying. If you both like each other then go for it!

Tell her how it is.

Take it from someone who has dated A LOT of really withholding guys... after the first little bit, when it can be intriguing... playing hard to get sucks. If you like someone, you should be with them... if not, don't lead them on. Games are just no good.

Reply 4

icedout

1

Leave her alone and she'll come to you.

Reply 5

Anonymous #1

how do u play hard to get? i just sort of kind of broke up with someone and i have this need to be with them all the time... and i know that i need to be harder to get... any help?

Reply 6

hugatree

11

icedout

Leave her alone and she'll come to you.

That's not true. And playing hard to get sux.

Reply 7

ProfessorFitBoy

OP

2

Bob123

have i miss understood, You like a girl and she likes you yet you want to forget about her and move on. I dont get what your saying. If you both like each other then go for it!

The thing is I really like here - so her being distant and aloof when I really want her just makes liking her (at the moment) feel even worse.
I am wondering if I should just forget about her so I dont have to go through this form of pain.

Reply 8

high priestess fnord

9

Anonymous

how do u play hard to get? i just sort of kind of broke up with someone and i have this need to be with them all the time... and i know that i need to be harder to get... any help?

there is a difference between playing hard to get and not being clingy. try and stay away from him. it sounds like its just hurting you anyway.

to the OP most girls who are playing games arent very interested in a serious relationship. you dont sound like the game playing type so just leave her alone. if she rele is interested like someone else sed, she will come to you. if not then you probly should move on neway.

Reply 9

KingRalph

3

Anonymous

how do u play hard to get? i just sort of kind of broke up with someone and i have this need to be with them all the time... and i know that i need to be harder to get... any help?

So you've just broke up with them, but you have this need to be with them? That's not playing hard to get, that's getting over someone. Actually now that I come to think about it, the very phrase 'playing hard to get' suggests that you have no life of your own and need to play a game in order to make it look like you have. The only thing is, the more you play hard to get, the less things you do and the more obsessed you become about that person... Thus undoing all your hard work.

You should be hard to get. You do this by having your own life. Join some clubs, get an evening job in a bar, go swimming, whatever. Just fill up your days with things to do, then people will be begging you to fit them into your busy schedule :wink:

.

Reply 10

Flank Runner

Talk to her and tell her how you feel, be direct that way she can't shrug you off and you get a definite answer from her

Good luck dude, hope it all works out for her

Reply 11

high priestess fnord

9

KingRalph

So you've just broke up with them, but you have this need to be with them? That's not playing hard to get, that's getting over someone. Actually now that I come to think about it, the very phrase 'playing hard to get' suggests that you have no life of your own and need to play a game in order to make it look like you have. The only thing is, the more you play hard to get, the less things you do and the more obsessed you become about that person... Thus undoing all your hard work.

You should be hard to get. You do this by having your own life. Join some clubs, get an evening job in a bar, go swimming, whatever. Just fill up your days with things to do, then people will be begging you to fit them into your busy schedule :wink:

.

if you rele like some1 you will allways be able to fit them in no matter how busy your schedule lol. i personally think playing hard to get is a bit stupid. ive done it when playing with guys im not that interested in and yes it does work if they have to do a little extra to get your attention but tbh why bother? if they like u they like u, if not then playing with them is pointless. a little distance at the right time stops u being taken for granted but "playing hard to get" is mostly for bimbos who have nothing better to do.

Reply 12

rico dan man

12

im in the exact same situation...she has also gone beyond the threshold of playing hard to game, its kinda confusing

Reply 13

anjurdsg

11

it's the best thing to play hard to get .... how else can you make someone WANT you to death? I've had girls obsess over me because I played hard...

But dont go too far, in case she thinks you're not interested at all..

Reply 14

so_this_is_sam

3

ever heard the rule, two can play at that game? i reccommend it. but personally, i HATE it when i dont know where i stand with a guy!!

Reply 15

anjurdsg

11

so_this_is_sam

ever heard the rule, two can play at that game? i reccommend it. but personally, i HATE it when i dont know where i stand with a guy!!

yes...my say is that women really do HATE it when the guy plays hard to get .... but at the same time, they LOVE the guy even more... :biggrin:

dial up the tension...

Reply 16

Anonymous #2

Sometimes people seem to be playing hard to get when in fact they're just very shy around the person they like and are therefore involuntarily stand offish, etc. I get like this and it's very annoying!But if she's just messing with you, I'd just be annoyed

Reply 17

Mad_Monkey59

2

ProfessorFitBoy

I was wondering if on the dating scene playing hard to get - ie signalling that you like someone else and then pretending that you don't like them at all in order to hopefully make them want you more is a good thing or a bad thing.

Obviously a bit of it is a bit of fun but Im talking about if you go beyond this threshold i.e. you really like someone, and they really like you, but they are constantly stand-offish to the point that you feel like just giving up and not bothering with them any more - by the way this girl does like me so I dont think its a case of her having gone off me.
(as you can probably tell this is my own personal girl trouble :wink:

)

Please someone help :frown:

should I continue to be tortured or just forget this girl I like and move on - even though she may not want me to.

Flirt your ass of with one of her mates...

Reply 18

sjuthani

6

I was having an argument about this with one of my best (female) friends recently, but she's made me see her point of view. I was saying its a stupid thing to do, but the guy that she likes seems to be messing her around- flirting with her, and making her think that they could be together, but basically doing the same with every girl. Upshot is this guy, who thinks he's a stud, has loads of girls hanging on to everything thing he does/says. With playing hard to get, she can get on with her own life, and if he was really interested, he'd have to make a real effort.

In my own experience, I can only advise- there's a difference between hard to get, and not interested. Don't mix them up!

Reply 19

Anonymous #1

KingRalph

So you've just broke up with them, but you have this need to be with them? That's not playing hard to get, that's getting over someone. Actually now that I come to think about it, the very phrase 'playing hard to get' suggests that you have no life of your own and need to play a game in order to make it look like you have. The only thing is, the more you play hard to get, the less things you do and the more obsessed you become about that person... Thus undoing all your hard work.

You should be hard to get. You do this by having your own life. Join some clubs, get an evening job in a bar, go swimming, whatever. Just fill up your days with things to do, then people will be begging you to fit them into your busy schedule :wink:

.

the thing is, is that first of all this is a girl on girl thing... and we were friends first. we go to thesame school. live in the asme boarding house. see each other every day. our lives are so interlinked that we end up in the same places at the same time. i need to look more hard to get, make her miss me, i hope... if not then i need to work out how to attract other attention to me cos i am bored of being single and want to go out and have fun... no need for relationship... but thats not something i ever wanted before and dont know how to go about meeting people particularly.

Playing Hard to Get

Related discussions

Articles for you