Am i still a virgin?

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Reply 20

tooti

Original post by brt1995

it was semi hard when i first put it in. then i tried to thrust and it went limp.

Did you use a condom?

Reply 21

brt1995

Original post by King Kebab

You shouldn't. These things happen to a lot of guys when they have sex the first time. It is nothing to worry about.

i am worrying about it though because i can see it happening again. i just basically bottled it. i am so sick and tired of being laughed at. all i want it is to just do it properly and get it overwith and lose it, then i won't be abnormal any more. even if i never had sex again i wouldn't care. but its been on my mind and i feel like i'm a failure. people don't understand when you're not good looking you might not get another chance. i would love to take viagra but i can't even afford it. what do i do? i can't really see a way out.

Reply 22

brt1995

Original post by tooti

Did you use a condom?

no

i know its stupid but i just got too eager

Reply 23

Weeves

The definition of loosing virginity is when the hymen aka 'cherry' is broke or 'popped'.
There is no 'requirement' as to what has to brake the hymen, therefore, many girls who take part in horse riding or masterbating etc often loose their virginity without even knowing.
The male doesn't have to ejaculate inside the female to have taken her/his virginity.

This was posted from The Student Room's iPhone/iPad App

Reply 24

tooti

Original post by brt1995

no

i know its stupid but i just got too eager

I thought so, wait until you are fully hard then put a condom on. Sex is a completely new sensation so it won't always go smoothly, plenty of people have had awkward experiences but not everyone will talk about it openly so you're not weird honestly!

Reply 25

Converse Rocker

Original post by brt1995

get it overwith and lose it, then i won't be abnormal any more. even if i never had sex again i wouldn't care.

Honestly mate, I think there are a lot more virgins at the age of 17 than you think. I think if you stop seeing sex as something mind-bogglingly important, you'll be just fine.

It really isn't a big deal in the grand spectrum of life, so try not to put yourself under so much pressure to lose your virginity. You kind of already have. Plus, practically everyone I know said their first time wasn't that great, you won't naturally perform like some sort of porn star. Just enjoy the ride :smile:

(no pun intended)

Reply 26

brt1995

Original post by tooti

that's the hard part. i can think about her and get hard. even her voice on the phone gets me hard. but i tried so many times that night and nothing worked. it was just lifeless. i need to find something that gives you erections quickly. viagra is the only thing i can think of but even if i did have money and ordered it online they'd send it to my house. and my mum would find it and open it. i can't let that happen. i just feel trapped and depressed.

Reply 27

tehFrance

Isn't it unless you cum you are a virgin? as you have to do the whole thing for it to count....

Reply 28

tooti

Original post by brt1995

Don't use viagra, its clear that you just feel under pressure, viagra is only supposed to be used when you can't get an erection at all. The first time I had sex with my ex he was incredibly nervous and he finished very quickly, but once we became more comfortable together the problem stopped. It doesn't mean every time we had sex it went perfectly but thats natural!

Nerves are expected for the first time and you will just keep making it worse if you are thinking 'I must get an erection I must get an erection', just enjoy the experience.

Reply 29

ildaf123

Original post by brt1995

to be honest i don't care if it's the worst experience ever. i just need to not be a virgin. i need to lose it so people dont think i'm a weirdo any more. if i don't perform this weekend i might not get another chance.

Then count it then, its fair enough! Your willy was inside of her so technically it kind of was sex.

I had a simular situation with my first time, we were realy drunk and I couldn't work out if it actually went in or he just podded around for a bit haha, but I ended up counting it anyway.

Reply 30

brt1995

Original post by ildaf123

That's what I was kind of hoping. I looked on the internet and most people said it doesn't matter if it went in for 30 second or 30 minutes, the virginity was lost. but i wasn't fully hard and something tells me i'm just clutching at straws and trying to feel better. i don't know. all i can do is just try again this weekend.

Reply 31

Dennerers

Original post by brt1995

Last week I was at this girls's house and she sat on my lap. I started getting hard, so we went upstairs to her room, got on the bed and then I put it inside her, but I had lost my erection. I got nervous and it just stayed soft. Then she sat on top of my with my limp penis inside and said she could feel it but that didn't work either. She said we'll try again at the weekend.

Does this mean I'm still a virgin? i don't know because one of my friends said I still am because i wasn't hard and didn't really bone her.

Someone please explain to me

Lets be honest you didn't technically have sex, therefore you just to like 3.5 base, which is unusually. Have fun with take two!

Reply 32

cl_steele

You could count it either way i guess but personally i wouldnt count that one im afriad...

shes preganant now

Your penis entered her, therefore you are no longer a virgin.

Reply 35

Llewellyn_J

You have had your penis inside a girl's vagina. Therefore, you are not a virgin anymore.

Reply 36

Llewellyn_J

Original post by brt1995

Hilarious that made me lol.

Reply 37

ken2

Original post by brt1995

Loool technically no you are not a virgin cos you been inside but your friends are right, you need to take a proper tour!
lool

This was posted from The Student Room's Android App on my GT-I9100

Reply 38

lovelopez

Somehow, a local strip club has got me on their mailing list and periodically send me advertising material and promotional offers. They sometimes come in quite ... explicit envelopes, and I'm fed up of the postman looking at me like I'm sort of sexual deviant when he delivers my post.

I'd like them to stop sending me these letters. Is there anything special that I need to do, or just phone them up and ask them to stop sending things to me or my address (I've asked Virgin in the past to not send things to me, so they took to sending them to my house address to 'The Occupier'

Reply 39

Kabloomybuzz

Original post by Weeves

Completely wrong. Virginity is a social construct and not dependent on the hymen. There isn't a scientific definition of virginity because its not a physical thing. Some girls are born without one, and men don't have one at all. Does this mean they are born non virgins? No.

Also, the hymen shouldn't "pop" or "break" its a thin layer of skin that stretches and sometimes tears a little. There is no popping involved.

Op, if you feel like you lost it, then tell yourself you have, but don't put so much pressure on yourself. The majority of people your age probably havent had sex yet and its mostly bravado. Don't put pressure on yourself because of what other people think you should do. Have you considered this may have happened because you are simply not ready?. If you can't stop to think to use a condom and are doing it more for social status than anything then id say you're probably not mature enough to be having sex. If your friends are pressuring you and calling toys weirdo for this they're not really friends to you. If you're taking the bait and putting this much value on their pressuring opinions, then its a little pathetic.