blow-out from ear stretching:/ Watch
The first thing you need to do is downsize, which you have Keep the 4mm jewellery in and do not be tempted to put anything bigger in it. From now on, you need to treat it like it's a brand new piercing. Do salt soaks (preferably with sea or rock salt, not table salt), with a quarter of a teaspoon of salt in a mug of warm water, try not to touch it, generally just baby it for a while.
What jewellery do you have in it? If it's anything **** like acrylic or silicone, you need to buy something else. Acrylic is porous and can harbour bacteria, and silicone is just a god awful thing to have in an aggravated stretch for so many reasons. You need to have something like titanium or glass plug in there, ideally.
It's not just the fact you didn't wait long enough before going up from 6mm, it's the fact that you're skipping sizes too. You should be going up in 1mm stages at most, rather than 2mm at the time!
Once it's healed properly, which might be a good few months from now, start doing oil massages twice a day and inserting jewellery from the back. This should help the appearance of the blow out. Good oils for massaging are jojoba and vitamin E.