Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#1
For a while my sex drive has been very low, but recently, my bf had a brain tumour and has been through the surgery, since he went in i havent ate much, i dont sleep very well, i have no energy and i always feel like life is not worth it. although i dont like my job i used to love going because i had a laugh with the people however now i feel that upset i dont wanna speak to anyone or even see anyone. i have to look after my bfs animals straight after work and my bf, my home life isnt the best atm, i try and stay away from people who will ask me if im alright cause i dont want to lie, i also often have suicidal thoughts, i need to know whats wrong with me?! i feel so ashamed i havent told my bf because he will worry and he has enough on his plate i havent even told my best friends or my sister who i usually tell everything to, i cant even think about going to the doctor because i dont want to face it, please can someone help me i feel like im alone in this
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Anonymous #2
#2
Report 7 years ago
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Hi,

I think the biggest problem you have had from what you have written is that you have kept everything to yourself. I think it would be good for you to tell someone close to you about what has happened and how you are feeling (even if you sent them a message on Facebook).

You shouldn't be ashamed that you haven't told you Boyfriend. From that and everything else you have written you seem like a very caring person but at this time its important that you have someone there to care about you.
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Anonymous #1
#3
Report Thread starter 7 years ago
#3
i usually tell all my problems to my boyfriend, i dont really know who to turn to i feel like im just gonna explode. i think the worst problem i have is my sex drive, before the surgery my boyfriend keeps thinking im not attracted to him anymore and i cant figure out why i dont have the drive anymore and its ruining our relationship, i cant really be bothered with much anymore either i just wanna cut everyone out and sit in my room all day on my own where noone can see
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shuttermagic
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#4
Report 7 years ago
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Hi, it sounds like you've gone through a lot recently, so I'm not surprised you've been feeling as you have.

Whilst I don't know what you have gone through, I do know the feeling of not wanting to (or not feeling able to) tell anyone how you're feeling, yet I imagine pretending that you're okay will start to feel quite emotionally draining after a while.

I really do think that telling someone, even part of how you're feeling will make you feel better. Keeping everything to yourself is only going to make the idea of finally saying something harder and will just put more pressure on yourself.

If you don't feel as though you can tell someone close to you or you are worried about burdening them, then you could always talk to someone objective like a counsellor who may be able to offer you support.

Also, with regards to your sex drive, It is more than likely related to the fact you have been quite stressed and down. Don't put too much pressure on yourself, why not try just relaxing with your boyfriend and going out or doing some casual things you both enjoy (keep communication as open as you can).

P.s. if you are worried you could have depression going to your doctor could help you.

Hope things feel better soon,
xx


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superwolf
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#5
Report 7 years ago
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I'd talk to your boyfriend. He's already noticed something's up, and by not telling him you're making both of you more unhappy. I know it's scary and you don't want to hurt anybody, but talking to someone really is for the best. :hugs: If you find it hard to have an actual conversation about this kind of thing, why not write him a letter? You could say pretty much what you've written here, and you'd be able to make sure you wrote everything you wanted to and didn't miss out/poorly explain anything.

I agree that you could also benefit from talking to a counsellor - if you're at uni they've likely got a free service - and seeing a doctor would be a good step too. You'll probably find that once you do tell someone you're close to, they'll become less worried if you show them you're seeking help.

Hope you and your boyfriend both recover soon.
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