The Student Room Group

sister tearing me apart

ok so i know many of you will probably read this and laugh, but my problem is literally breaking my family apart. My sister. She's only 11 which is so pathetic, but everything she does hurts me. She's totally different from me, in that she has to be in constant contact with her friends, or else she is a moody cow.

She's not even reached her teenage years but already she's stroppy/moody/spiteful/abusive to me. When my parents are at home, she'll just abuse me verbally. When my parents are out, she hits me/punches me/kicks me and makes me feel so low.

I've told my parents but they say I should just stick up for myself. I can't. I've tried ignoring her/doing the emotional guilt, hitting her back, but nothing seems to work. I really need help. She's getting to me and its starting to show in the way I behave around others. :frown: This is so hard because I know I love her and would do anything for her,but yet she treats me like this. :frown:

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Reply 1
first of all, how old are you? if you're anything above 16, i think you are CAPABLE of taking some serious action...

talk it out with her and tell her to lay it off...

and if she doesnt, give her a TIGHT slap in the face that she'll remember the rest of her life...

if there's nothing you can do, at least do this
Reply 2
I hate being this pathetic. I'm 17 for gods sake. I've tried talking to her calmy, I've tried yelling. I have serious confidence issues, and she doesn't make them any better :frown:
Do your parents realise just how annoying she is and how much her behaviour is affecting you? It could be that they think you are over exaggerating but if you could prove to them somehow what she's really like then maybe they'd be more inclined to do something? You should secretly monitor her beahviour, write down everything she does to you and then show it to your parents. Or....video her secretly :P But realistically, surely there is something you can do to stop her behaving like such a spoiled brat??? Can you not ignore her?? You're more patient than i am, i would have hit her by now!! Good LUCK
Reply 4
physical violence sometimes comes in handy....

i mean, come on... if your parents are not gonna handle it, who else is?

actually, as i'm writing this post, i'm having a brilliant idea...

what if you tell your friends to scare her big time not to touch you again? but that would mean breaking the relationship between you and your sister, and friends interfering in family matters...

well, i dunno... i think you really gotta take it up to someone higher up who can help ya... talk to your parents again about her, really... or jus do the usual-teenage-drama of "you just dont understand me" to your parents and cry... hey, it sounds stupid, but it might work
Reply 5
Id slap the wench
Reply 6
hmmm well i'm not usually the dramatic type, so perhaps that could work. There I was thinking I could actually get along with her :frown:
Reply 7
poor you... you really seem in a sad situation...(no sarcasm intended) but come ON! she's a KID for cryin out loud! how big of a mouth can she have?! dont tell me you cant handle kids... how're you ever gonna be a mom!? jus do as i said and whack the living sh*t out of her one day... she should cower every time you walk into the room..

oh, and as a side note: i think you should consider doing a self-confidence-building course or somewhat... there're plenty available... coz you really seem like you have NO confidence whatsoever
Reply 8
I'd have slapped her by now.

Hitting children isn't nice, but at 11 years old she knows what she's doing and she probably knows how it makes you feel.

I'd just give her a short, sharp slap and say, "And if you use me as your punching bag again, you'll get a harder one. You're a nasty little girl."

She gets the physical reminder, an awareness that you can and will fight back (even if you're just bluffing about doing it again, she doesn't know that) and also a reminder that she is in fact smaller than you. If she carries on then obviously you can't just keep slapping her but chances are this will stop the worse of it.
Reply 9
FFS she's 11 - what is she going to be like when she is 18? Your parents seem so uninterested in disciplining their daughter that you're going to have to force them to open their eyes! Get your parents to take you seriously and if they won't then talk to someone at your school - call in the councellor. Make a bloody big fuss.
Reply 10
younger kids are usually pampered more.. (note the USUALLY, and please refrain from flames saying how you're a younger kid and doenst get pampered).. they have a lot more say in the house... it happens in my house :frown:...im the older one...

i'd say approach someone older.... do u have grandparents or smth?
Reply 11
Do you have ducktape and a big closet?
Reply 12
Bismarck
Do you have ducktape and a big closet?


lol
and somewhere to throw the key..
Hmm, I dunno; move out? Or threaten your parents that you would if they don't do anything? But in any case, you can't let her get away with it. Some of the advice already mentioned sounds good.
Reply 15
A Shining Light
Hmm, I dunno; move out? Or threaten your parents that you would if they don't do anything? But in any case, you can't let her get away with it. Some of the advice already mentioned sounds good.


i was gonna sugges that but thought it might be too unrealistic :p:
1 laugh at her
2 lock the door to ur room
3 keep out of home as much as possible (to a certain extent)
4 enroll in a self-defense class

5 maybe u should ask her why she's doing it? (ok i know this sounds dumb) but possibly she could be having trouble at school? being bullied or trampled upon? so she comes home to pick on someone else so she feels sort of powerful?
Reply 17
jade_prinzess
1 laugh at her
2 lock the door to ur room
3 keep out of home as much as possible (to a certain extent)
4 enroll in a self-defense class

5 maybe u should ask her why she's doing it? (ok i know this sounds dumb) but possibly she could be having trouble at school? being bullied or trampled upon? so she comes home to pick on someone else so she feels sort of powerful?


:eek:

didnt think of that...happened to me once! i bullied my brother to feel poweful!
Reply 18
Bismarck
Do you have ducktape and a big closet?


oh that sounds like heaven! :biggrin:

1 laugh at her i've tried, that makes her more frustrated, so she storms off and just comes back at me.
2 lock the door to ur room I like this idea, I'll use the excuse of revision, like I already do, just not as extreme lol!
3 keep out of home as much as possible (to a certain extent)
4 enroll in a self-defense class I think i may have to!

5 maybe u should ask her why she's doing it? (ok i know this sounds dumb) but possibly she could be having trouble at school? being bullied or trampled upon? so she comes home to pick on someone else so she feels sort of powerful?I know she is reasonably quiet in school. But I think the main thing is, mum works in the same school as her, so she's attached to her. Do you think she'd be jealous of my relationship with our mum? :confused:
Reply 19
As far as self defence goes you are allowed to use as much force as is required to restrain her. The solution here is to trip her up and sit on her until she grovels to you and says sorry for being such a cow.