The Student Room Group

Wanting to move out

I don’t know if this is in the right place but I hope it is. If it isn’t if a mod could be kind enough to move it that would be appreciated.

I'm 16 years old at the moment and would like to move out with 2 friends of mine and my boyfriend in June / July time when I'm 17. The problem is that because I am still going to be less than 18 years old I need the permission of my parents to be able to move out. I asked them last night and today about it but just got shouted at by ma saying I haven’t thought this through and that there is NO way I could afford it. My dad on the other hand didn’t have a go but just said to think about it a bit more first to make sure I’m making the right decision and that I should finish college first (which I have to say is reasonable as he is paying so much for it and I’m not planning on moving before I finish college anyway).

Could someone help me out a bit on how I’m going to convince them that:
1. I have thought about this thoroughly
2. I could afford it even on minimum wage for my age on 48 hours a week
3. that it isn’t too soon

Basically convinse them about anything they may be worried about.

Any advise would be helpful thank you.

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Reply 1
Because of the fact they dont like it, nothing will probably make them see you have thought about it. From a personal point of view, if yo're paying for rent and paying towards the bills, you'll be left with little or no money to spend on what you want, which is why maybe you should stay at home so you can enjoy your money. You're really too young to be worrying about money.
Reply 2
from experience no matter how much you plan something or get details about something if your parents dont like the idea when you first mention they never will, sorry!
Reply 3
how likely is it that you can get a job for 48 hours a week, straight away? Maybe you should wait until you have a stable job, then move.
Doom_and_Gloom

2. I could afford it even on minimum wage for my age on 48 hours a week


To be honest you can afford it at minimum wage working 20 hours a week. It's more a question of how much disposable income you want, and the quality of your flat ect.

*Jaded
Reply 5
JadedHippy
To be honest you can afford it at minimum wage working 20 hours a week. It's more a question of how much disposable income you want.

*Jaded


Exactly, it's likely she'd have little to non disposable income. Which is why i suggest living at home. I mean dont get me wrong, im not saying moving out will be a disaster, but its not ideal.
Reply 6
Kink2000
how likely is it that you can get a job for 48 hours a week, straight away? Maybe you should wait until you have a stable job, then move.

Well I am willing to work more than the 48 hours for my age group (I've found out you can sign an opt-out agreement which means you can do more) this will make it more likely to get a job as the employer isn't having to arange it so I don't work more than 48 hours. I would get a job now if it wasn't for my parents not allowing it as they want me to concentrate on my college work.
i signed the opt out agreement and still ended up only work 30 odd hrs a week in summer...which according to my employer was 'full time'...48 hrs a week will suck your life away, but then i totally understand about wanting to move out...I'm at uni and dont go home all that much, its nice to have my own space. If you win your parents over, they are more likely to help you out with everything... you have to show them how your gona benefit from it though...
Doom_and_Gloom
The problem is that because I am still going to be less than 18 years old I need the permission of my parents to be able to move out.


Is this an English law? (just wondering as we do not have this in Scotland).

*Jaded
Reply 9
Just don't forget that you'll have to pay things like council tax too out of your wages and on wherever you live no doubt, i don't know how much it is but its around £70 month up here on flats, plus a deduction from wages.

I just know friends who haven't been able to find jobs for 20 hours never miind 40.

I think if your able to show your parents you can support yourself financially they would be more willing to let you move out.
Reply 10
JadedHippy
Is this an English law? (just wondering as we do not have this in Scotland).

*Jaded


I thought it was UK wide...
covered farm wagon
48 hours a week is loads! I remember what it is like wanting so badly to move out and have your own space, your own life, &c., but if you're working that much, you won't have a lot of time for much else. Will you have finished college after this term? Are you planning on going to uni? If you've thought it through and are certain it is what you want, then I'm pretty sure your parents will come around though. Explain how you're going to afford it and everything to show them that you've thought it through, and if you're still all set to do it after a few months, maybe they'll agree. I can't say for sure, not knowing your parents, but basically parents seem to love saying 'I told you so', so even if it goes wrong and you need to move back home, they'll be happy.

Yes by the end of June I will have finished college and got my A-Levels thank goodness.

Yes I am planning on going to uni, however I am planning on taking 2 or 3 years out (I have to take one anyway because I can't get into uni this year) so I can afford it myself with no help from my parents (apart from my prudential money which is for me to spend on uni).

I have thought this through and have even put together an excel thing for budgeting. If all four of us show that we can easily afford this I can’t see how they can say no. If worse goes to worse and I have to come back then they can say they were right but I don’t see how they can when I haven’t yet.
Kink2000
Just don't forget that you'll have to pay things like council tax too out of your wages and on wherever you live no doubt, i don't know how much it is but its around £70 month up here on flats, plus a deduction from wages.

I just know friends who haven't been able to find jobs for 20 hours never miind 40.

I think if your able to show your parents you can support yourself financially they would be more willing to let you move out.

I've worked out ALL expenses for moving out and I’ve worked out that I can still afford it, even after tax I’m quite sure I can. It’s all about budgeting which thankfully I am good at as my parents as it stand only give me £15/month that I have to go out with and have even taught me how to budget (yes I realise I’m not paying rent or for food etc but I am able to get cloths, go to cinema, and have nights out on that £15).
Reply 13
Doom_and_Gloom
(apart from my prudential money which is for me to spend on uni)

Oh, of course, dahling!
Reply 14
Perhaps you should consider your further education/ability to get a decent job before you start getting spun up in the notion that you're going to move out and live happily ever after with your friends/bf.

There are more costs than just rent - remember... Phone, utilities, FOOD! TV licence etc.

As for the job, you can't just go to an employer and say - yeah I want to do 48 hours a week! You know how much difficulty I've had getting a full-time job. "Must have experience" etc. Not only that though, 48 hours a week is REDICULOUS, Jen. I find it hard enough doing a tuppence-an-hour McJob for 17 hours a week some weeks if my shifts are busy/boring. Not only will you have no money for yourself, you'll also not have any TIME for yourself. 48 hours a week will certainly screw up your sex drive (and we both know what that's normally like!)

Then the "what-if's?" What if you split up with lee? What if you and your friends fall out - you need to plan for the eventuality of 1 member of the group being unable to pay the rent - what if someone decides to move out? You could be left completely scuppered.

As for your parents - I'm not surprised they've not taken to this too well, and as some others have said... they're unlikely to warm to the idea at all.

I know this sounds really negative Jen... but I just think its a really bad idea because it could all end in tears.
Reply 15
Doom_and_Gloom
I've worked out ALL expenses for moving out and I’ve worked out that I can still afford it, even after tax I’m quite sure I can. It’s all about budgeting which thankfully I am good at as my parents as it stand only give me £15/month that I have to go out with and have even taught me how to budget (yes I realise I’m not paying rent or for food etc but I am able to get cloths, go to cinema, and have nights out on that £15).


why do you want to move out? is there no benefit to staying at home?

you seem to be very optimistic of finding a job that will give you 48 hours a week! you're only 16, and don't even qualify for the minimum wage I don't think - there may even be legal restrictions on the number of hours you can work, have you checked that out - ie. you might not be able to sign an opt-out clause

you want to spend most of the next three years making ends meet before going to uni? I thought it was uni where you made ends meet then got a job..... plus you'd be out of education for so long you'd be pretty rusty by the time you got to uni - could also jeopardise your choices by taking so long out of uni

why not just get a job from home for a year and then go to uni - you've your whole life still in front of you then, one more year of living with parents can't be that bad - with you working then you'd be showing you are independent and they bound to give you credit for that, and not be so bossy if that is the problem
Mad Vlad
Perhaps you should consider your further education/ability to get a decent job before you start getting spun up in the notion that you're going to move out and live happily ever after with your friends/bf.

There are more costs than just rent - remember... Phone, utilities, FOOD! TV licence etc.

As for the job, you can't just go to an employer and say - yeah I want to do 48 hours a week! You know how much difficulty I've had getting a full-time job. "Must have experience" etc. Not only that though, 48 hours a week is REDICULOUS, Jen. I find it hard enough doing a tuppence-an-hour McJob for 17 hours a week some weeks if my shifts are busy/boring. Not only will you have no money for yourself, you'll also not have any TIME for yourself. 48 hours a week will certainly screw up your sex drive (and we both know what that's normally like!)

Then the "what-if's?" What if you split up with lee? What if you and your friends fall out - you need to plan for the eventuality of 1 member of the group being unable to pay the rent - what if someone decides to move out? You could be left completely scuppered.

As for your parents - I'm not surprised they've not taken to this too well, and as some others have said... they're unlikely to warm to the idea at all.

I know this sounds really negative Jen... but I just think its a really bad idea because it could all end in tears.

When I said I had thought about all expenses I had included all and even more of what you have put. I have even included emergency money if anything was to go wrong.

Yes it can be hard to get a job I know that. That’s why I’m going to start looking TOMORROW. I don’t care what my ma says I’m getting a job (my dad didn’t seem too bothered about it when I talked to him just now). OK so it screws my sex drive up I think Lee’s and my sex drives are already rather screwed as it is. I can’t see it making much more difference.

It’s more likely for me not to be able to handle living there financially if anyone so it would more likely than not be me that will move back out. However the other three have worked out that they can do this without me. It just makes it a bit easier on them is all. The other two friends are married through a ritual although it’s not seen as marriage in the eyes of the law. They aren’t going anywhere. Yes things could go wrong between Lee and I but as I have mentioned the three of them can afford it without me. I just make it that little bit easier on them.
Reply 17
Pardon me, but it doesn't sound like your parents are awful or that they WON'T support you at Uni, so why move out? :confused:
Reply 18
The other two friends are married through a ritual although it’s not seen as marriage in the eyes of the law

^o) care to clarify?
Reply 19
Doom_and_Gloom
The other two friends are married through a ritual although it’s not seen as marriage in the eyes of the law.


:rolleyes:

jeez, how young are you guys?

if you're all around the same age, things can change so much after leaving college for all of you - new friends, experiences, etc

its very risky, there's a lot of chance it won't work out - it seems more sensible to at least get college out of the way and leave it for a few months, and then see how things are going

your parents are going to have to sign any rental agreement as well - I sure as hell wouldn't be prepared to do that for any 16 year old kid of mine - if one person doesn't pay the rent, the agreement will say that everyone else has to pay - even if the three other people were to scarper, you'd be liable for all the rent

at the end of the day, I think it will just come down to the fact that you are too young, and there's too much at risk