Advice on self-harming please?

Hi everyone - sorry, I know this has been brought up a lot before, but I'd just like to put this up and see if anyone can offer some advice.

I've been depressed for several years and used to self-harm on a regular basis; I was also addicted to alcohol and lately I've started both habits up again. It's driving me mad because I managed to quit for a couple of months and now I'm back to square one. It's also getting harder to hide that I've started harming again because I've done some fairly nasty damage to my sides so it hurts to move :frown:

I'm concerned as well because I've ended up in hospital twice with suicide attempts (tablets) and I don't want to get unhappy enough to do that again.

Sorry to inflict this on everyone but I haven't anyone to ask (the only people who know about my habits think I've stopped for good and I'm ashamed to tell them I've started again, is that stupid?). I also know there's other people on TSR with similar problems so if anyone has any suggestions I'd be really grateful. Thanks.

Reply 1

tony_almeida_is_god

you need to start finding out what is the cause of these long term depressed feelings. Why do you want to inflict pain upon yourself? sounds like you make be turning anger inwards that should be directed and channelled elsewhere. For the love of god please go to your doctor. it is confidential and they wont tell anyone else. They'll give you an assessment and then refer you to a mental health care worker who can help you decide the best way to approach getting better. I would absolutely recommend anti-depressants- just so that you can get to a stable level with which to work with and motivate you to help yourself. please please please get help

Reply 2

bumblebee16

get yourself to a dr ASAP. if you want to talk to people online about it try NSHN.co.uk as there are loads of other people in the same situation. remember to look after yourself first and foremost.

:smile:

Reply 3

Doodahdoo

13

it might be worth a visit to [Recover your life]. Its a website set up specifically for self-harmers, and is also good for alcholoism and such stuff.

Its easy enough to say "get help", but how much help can a doctor give? they'll examine you, talk to you, then push you off to someone somewhere. Try focusing on this yourself, asking yourself questions, pushing yourself beyond what you think you can do. See if you can go a day without SI-ing, a week, a month. Give yourself a reward, the more you can go.

Take care. Jox

Reply 4

Daragh

15

This Self Harm Resource may be of use.

Reply 5

The Canadian

11

Something I was helping with recently is a scheme for people who have self harming tendancies to take up sports where there is a risk of injury. I was teaching a group of teenagers who have all tried suicide before to snowboard, and they were having a good time doing it.

A lot of shrinks say that snowboarders are glorified self harmers putting our lives at risk for fun, and we may well be, but we gain injuries as a side effect of the sport. Not deliberate.

It may be worth a shot if the normal doctor advice / plans / whatever don't work, to try snowboarding or dirt biking or whatever, something extreme, and if you stack it, you've got the harm there, but it isn't a deliberate concious action.

It's just an alternative idea to the regular old routine for getting past self harming, and it's a lot more fun than meetings and shrink visits.

Reply 6

Anonymous #2

its all a horrid feeling, and nothing that can be sorted instantly. I have known a fair few people go through this and they have all pulled through and live happy lives. I think the biggest point is stay positive whatever happens. dont let bad thoughts even enter your head... sometimes it helps to have a freind who you are very close to who can help and be there fore you. Everytime you feel like your going to do something, call them .... or find anotha way to stop yourself....

Reply 7

Aberdonian*Lass

1

hold icecubes in your fists as tight as you can for as long as you want...there you have the pain, the release, but not the physical marks

Reply 8

xXMessedUpXx

15

Its normal to feel ashamed of your self harm. Especially when you have to go back into the age of routine of hiding behind long sleeves and lies. You say you managed to quit for a couple of months, that may seem forever ago to you now, but you've done it before. Think back to how much better you felt (assuming you did). Feel proud of the fact you're trying to beat this, and how close you have come to beating it (a few months of not self harmer feels like years to a self harmer i tell thee). You can do it again. Maybeit might help to look at why you need to self harm? What does it do for you? You may feel better in the short term, but how will it make you feel after? Is it worth it? Is there another way (non-destructive) that you can disract yourself and get rid of some of the pain/anger/shame etc?

Sorry i'm asking so many questions, just sometimes helps to question why. If you still feel teh need and have no one to confide in at such a time (if you don'talresdy know of it the Bodies Under Siege site is a good place to go when feeling vunerabl, or talk to the Samartains) then try the 5 minute rule. And keep trying it. It makes you realsie if i've gone 5 now, i can do another 5. Or how about designating somewhere in your room as a safe zone? Promise and make it clear to yourself that, for example, you will not self harm on your bed. If you get an urge then go sit on there and chill for a few mins etc. Another thing is, if you really must do something, many people advise holding ice cubes in your hands. They hurt cos of the cold, but don't do any damage.

Its hard to tell someone you've started doing it again, i know as i still haven't confided in my family. Though i did tell my bf. So at least there is someone who can support me. maybe find one person who you can tell?

Sorry if ive just thrwon loads of info at you, hope something in there may make sense! Stay safe and if you want to know more, we're happy to help :smile:

Reply 9

MissSmith

1

get an elastic band and put it on your wrist and when you feel the urge to self harm ping the band instead. one of my mates did that and said it worked, she stopped harming after it as well.

think to yourself this; what am i achieveing by self hariming? a ten second hit of adrenalin will quite possibly be the answer. so, then think is it really worth it?

basically try to find a new way to release you anger or whetever causes you to self harm. in my opinion, depression is merely anger without enthusiasm. so try not to feel so anry about things and look at how good it all is. :smile:

Advice on self-harming please?

Related discussions

Articles for you