Can you get a guy interested in you once he&#x27;s lost interest??

OP

I'd settle for mates, if he wanted something more then yippee for me, if not then I wouldn't even bring it up. We were only mates to start with so that's the way I miss him, though I do wonder what could have happened if I'd been in a different situation y'know?

Reply 3

Just a question: between this guy and your ex, who rated higher?

Reply 4

OP

lol rated higher?! I was seeing someone and don't cheat so I couldn't do anything with the other guy. We stayed friends throughout the time I broke up with my ex but when I wouldn't go to Edinburgh with him and his mates that kinda of sealed the deal for him. We've emailed a couple of times since just to say hi but we're not the kinds of friends we used to be if that makes sense.

Reply 5

Tarts_n_Vicars

lol rated higher?! I was seeing someone and don't cheat so I couldn't do anything with the other guy. We stayed friends throughout the time I broke up with my ex but when I wouldn't go to Edinburgh with him and his mates that kinda of sealed the deal for him. We've emailed a couple of times since just to say hi but we're not the kinds of friends we used to be if that makes sense.

So you were happy staying with your boyfriend when you met him? You never had thoughts about how you would like to be with this other guy instead?

Reply 6

OP

Well it did cross my mind, but I didn't do anything about it.

Reply 7

Tarts_n_Vicars

Well it did cross my mind, but I didn't do anything about it.

Well clearly you liked him quite a bit.

But he wasn't worth ending things with your boyfriend for?

Reply 8

OP

I didn't think so no. I was in a long term thing and as much as I liked him.....no

Reply 9

Tarts_n_Vicars

I didn't think so no. I was in a long term thing and as much as I liked him.....no

Well I just wonder why you're thinking about this guy who isn't really interested, when he didn't exactly cause a wave of emotions when you met him.
Just sounds like a guy you got on reasonably well with. Are you telling us everything?

Reply 10

OP

What else would there be? I liked him but I was seeing someone. He alluded to us being more, but again, I was seeing someone at the time. It all came to a head with the Edinburgh thing.

My question was as he appears to have made up his mind about me (i.e. we don't really talk anymore) is there any way to change it?

Reply 11

ApeXaviour

7

Speaking personally, if I'd used to like someone and then had lost interest it would definitely take a physical spark for me to suddenly like her again, especially if I knew we already got on well. What I mean is basically gussy up and wear something revealing next time you meet up with him, such that he goes "wow" when he sees you, but don't necessarily be flirty or anything, just friendly like when you to got on well on your holiers, but with no pressure. A little bit of ambiguity to start off with is never a bad thing. If you sense a renewed interest you can follow it up later. Make him earn it.

Reply 12

Tarts_n_Vicars

is there any way to change it?

Well being far from him, you can only send a text or call and if that doesn't create much of a response then not really. It is a hard one... calling him telling him you'll be Edinburgh and asking him if he'd want to meet up is a possibility. You could send a text but a text is so easily ignored. It would have to contain something to really catch his attention.

But why bother? He doesn't seem to have had such a huge impact on you (or maybe I'm mistaken and you can't get him out of your mind?).

Reply 13

OP

He did, but the silence afte the Edinburgh thing made me think I'd missed my chance. I do still think about him and thought I should make an effort - you only live once after all!

Thanks for the advice btw Ape.

Reply 14

Barny

When I've met girls I've liked in different places of the country, the same sort of thing happens, start of speaking to each other abit, and then it just fades away, because, being in different parts of the country, theres not much you can really do about things except talk, which becomes abit stale after a while.

I think that sounds like whats happened here? If so, he will definitely still be interested if he sees you again.

Reply 15

envious

It depends why he has lost interest.

In your case Tarts and Vicars (cool name btw :p:

), it sounds like you have allowed him to think that you're not romantically interested in him so I guess he's just decided to cut his losses :rolleyes:

. After all the effort he has made with you (espc NYE) where you haven't really given him anything back, it is kinda reasonable that he isn't gonna keep the same level of interest forever. I do think however, that if you were to do sometimg that led him to believe you were interested, then you might see his level of interest subsequently also increase :wink:

Reply 16

danni_bella

I know someone that would be interested in you(if you lived in the same hemisphere) :biggrin:

Reply 17

OP

lol @ you DB!

Thanks for all the replies everyone. Just one final question...as we still don't live in the same place (slightly further away now I've gone to uni!) is it worth emailing or should I wait til I'm in his town to make contact (I can feel a trip back to England coming on)? :biggrin:

Reply 18

Barny

Let him know beforehand that you're coming over, what if you get to england, try and contact him and hes not there..?

Reply 19

OP