The Student Room Group

HELP...he's too nice!

I've been seeing this guy on an off for a few months. On paper he's so perfect...really smart, good looking, sweet, really good at everything BUT he's just too nice! He asks my permission when he wants to kiss me, his response is always 'whatever you want sweetie', he wants to take everything sooooo slow and he never fails to call me at the exact time I ask.

I don't know what to do because I feel like I've found the perfect guy but the problem is...it's not sexy! I like a guy to take control sometimes, to be spontaneous and fun. Is this askin too much? Anyone else felt something similar?

Do you think I should just stick with Mr Nice guy, cos let's face it how many good lookin, nice AND sexy guys are there out there, hope he'll change OR look for someone who I find really attractive. I don't want the cliche 'bad boy' but this guy is just too nice! HELP!

Scroll to see replies

he isnt too nice. hes just a push over from what youve said. its not too much to ask he get a spine is it? he sounds worth persevering with tho. if it doesnt get better soon then i guess u have to dump him.
Reply 2
Its called being a gentlemen, what do you want your bf to do? Beat you up?

You can't win, being nice, you don't like it, being horrible, you don't like it?

Like WTF is wrong with people nowadays?

:rolleyes:
My ex was totally like that (until our nasty break up lol), he was your classic "nice" boyfriend....he'd let me have everything my own way, was always buying me stuff (I hate guys buying me anything, maybe that's just me though), did all the thoughtful things that you think you want a guy to do. It drove me insane to the point where I'd say stuff to get his back up - and still he wouldn't rise to it. I don't thrive on aggression but his lack of passion and feisty-ness drove me potty.

If it annoys you now it always will...you could try mentioning it to him although it didn't work when I tried it with my ex...he launched into his "I'm a nice guy and nice guys always finish last" speech. Luckily he met someone else and that was the end of that...
^^LOL...just tell him that you dont want him to be too nice
Reply 5
guest1984
Its called being a gentlemen, what do you want your bf to do? Beat you up?

You can't win, being nice, you don't like it, being horrible, you don't like it?

Like WTF is wrong with people nowadays?

:rolleyes:


Gentleman and wussy aren't really the same.
Reply 6
jb_sweden
Gentleman and wussy aren't really the same.


I completely agree. But it's a fine line and I'm not sure what I'd suggest to the OP...
guest1984
Its called being a gentlemen, what do you want your bf to do? Beat you up?

You can't win, being nice, you don't like it, being horrible, you don't like it?

Like WTF is wrong with people nowadays?

:rolleyes:


she wants him to be a man. its boring if u allways get you own way!!
treat him like sh** he should act different.
Reply 9
jb_sweden
Gentleman and wussy aren't really the same.


Being nice does not make you a wussy, you can be nice to your gf, but be a mean guy to people you don't like
guest1984
Its called being a gentlemen, what do you want your bf to do? Beat you up?

You can't win, being nice, you don't like it, being horrible, you don't like it?

Like WTF is wrong with people nowadays?

:rolleyes:



bet you're a right hit with the laydeez
Reply 11
guest1984
Its called being a gentlemen, what do you want your bf to do? Beat you up?


It's not being a gentleman, it's being a doormat.

Yes, it's good that he's reliable with phonecalls etc, we like that, but come on, asking EVERY time he wants to kiss her; just following whatever she wants all the time? I'd get bored very quickly. I like to be treated well - as an equal (albeit a suitably special one :wink:); I don't like to be treated like I'm some goddess and he's not worthy of me.

To the OP - I don't think you should ditch him just because of this, but if you don't like it, then let him know in some way. Say "No, what do YOU want?" when he says "whatever you want," kiss him without asking for permission (and tell him he doesn't need to!), just be a bit more challenging and exciting, and he'll hopefully match it.
Reply 12
high priestess fnord
she wants him to be a man. its boring if u allways get you own way!!

why dont u see if you can get him into a little ruff sex. push him onto the bed hard then roll him on top of you so that he *has* to make a bit of an effort.


I really have no clue, I haven't even been on a date before!!!!

:p:
Reply 13
serious narb
bet you're a right hit with the laydeez


Nope mate

They always chase me! laugh at me/with me! smile at me! but they never want to go out me!

I am screwed for life!!!

:frown:
guest1984
Nope mate

They always chase me! laugh at me/with me! smile at me! but they never want to go out me!

I am screwed for life!!!

:frown:


i'd stop 'being a gentleman' fella
Reply 15
Helenia
It's not being a gentleman, it's being a doormat.

Yes, it's good that he's reliable with phonecalls etc, we like that, but come on, asking EVERY time he wants to kiss her; just following whatever she wants all the time? I'd get bored very quickly. I like to be treated well - as an equal (albeit a suitably special one :wink:); I don't like to be treated like I'm some goddess and he's not worthy of me.



I see

:cool:
Reply 16
serious narb
i'd stop 'being a gentleman' fella


LOL, I am not a gentleman, the exact opposite!

:wink:
Reply 17
just tell him to take control over decisions and everything as you can't be the one to decide all the time, jokingly say its his 'job' or whatever, and say you like a 'stronger' man......that doesn't mean he has to start lifting weights.....though that would create a nice body....hmmm
guest1984
LOL, I am not a gentleman, the exact opposite!

:wink:

Maybe you've gone too far the other way. Aim to be inbetween!
Reply 19
HistoryStudent
Maybe you've gone too far the other way. Aim to be inbetween!


Can't be arsed, its only girls

:smile: