This discussion is now closed.
Check out other Related discussions
- Liverpool john moores
- Uni residence
- studying for national 5 chemistry
- Sex sounds exhausting (+ terrible anxiety)...
- Physician associate at Surrey university - september 2025
- No GCSE's and moving on to A Levels
- I can’t make my boyfriend *** and it’s ruining my self esteem
- Citric Acid, Cream of tartar Condensation Polymer
- Guy who doesn't come out of his room
- what do girls think of guys that fap a lot?
- Hills Road Catchment Area???
- Should I (20 M) break up with my boyfriend (20M) / are my new feelings genuine?
- University- Collusion Turnitin
- Reviews on KCL accommodation halls ?
- help your girl out again
- Pretty sure I've found a cancerous lump on my abdomen
- Attendance
- Mental health and wellbeing at BCU
- Uni houses
- ESAT Study Group & Advice
help, on a problem concerning a guy
I really need help on this and I’ll apologise before I start if this ends up really long.
(I'm in college if it helps, and if u were wondering im a girl)
So, theres this guy who I've liked for ages, just never done anything about it, or told anyone as I've always thought never mind let it pass sort of thing. Well right at the start of term this guy always said hi to me and in class he would just ask me about work (as we’re in 2 of the same classes). But I didn’t realise anything and at the time it was the start of the year and I was unsettled and wasn’t really paying attention but now my friend thinks that he may have liked me then.
Well a few months down the road I do like him, a lot, and my friend (who is male if it helps) sort of found out and he was like you gotta do something to show that you like him, cos I have never really spoken to him or had a proper conversation with him. So I tried, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything, I just got completely lost for words every time I saw him. Now cos my friend kept going on about it, I told him to just go and tell this guy that I liked him, so he did. Well after he told him this guy said that he had a girlfriend, that he was sorry and that he would talk to me. Now I wasn’t aware that he had a girlfriend, the only possibility I can come up with is that it is someone out of college cos if it is someone in college then he doesn’t spend anytime with them…
So this happened on Friday, so then I waited til Monday.
So Monday I went in and someone asked me if I liked this guy and I was like what! So I'm guessing he must have told his friends… but no-one else has said anything to me so that’s ok.
Well I was expecting him to say something but I didn’t give him chance. Tuesday in a lesson he sort of walked into me, said sorry and laughed. In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!
Then today, when I had a lesson with him I was waiting outside, then he came past opened the door and sort of made a thing about putting the stopper under it as if he was waiting for me to go in. then on the bus home he was sat like nearly opposite to me but I avoided looking at him at all.
Now my problem is, could he possible like me at all? Well you cant really judge that very well.
How should I act when he is around? Sort of show that I'm interested in and things or completely avoid him?? The avoiding thing is what I've been doing up til now cos I don’t know what to do!! And I don’t really want everyone finding out if he really has got a girlfriend and is totally not interested in me.
So now that he knows that I like him its sort of just up to him, I've noticed that he ‘might’ be acting different slightly but that might just be me… and from how he’s acting its either that he is interested and just showing more or he’s turned it around and made it into a laugh sort of thing, after all he did go and tell his friends but… what do u think?
So in conclusion:
I do really like this guy, the problem being that i haven’t had a proper conversation with him so I cant go back to just the ‘friendly’ type, theres the problem with the girlfriend in which if its true then I’ll just stay well away, then the problem of what should I do now and how should I act, that’s the main ones. And I really do like him that’s why I've had to resort to help!!!
Thanks for any sensible comments!!!! and lost of help!!
(I'm in college if it helps, and if u were wondering im a girl)
So, theres this guy who I've liked for ages, just never done anything about it, or told anyone as I've always thought never mind let it pass sort of thing. Well right at the start of term this guy always said hi to me and in class he would just ask me about work (as we’re in 2 of the same classes). But I didn’t realise anything and at the time it was the start of the year and I was unsettled and wasn’t really paying attention but now my friend thinks that he may have liked me then.
Well a few months down the road I do like him, a lot, and my friend (who is male if it helps) sort of found out and he was like you gotta do something to show that you like him, cos I have never really spoken to him or had a proper conversation with him. So I tried, but I just couldn’t bring myself to do anything, I just got completely lost for words every time I saw him. Now cos my friend kept going on about it, I told him to just go and tell this guy that I liked him, so he did. Well after he told him this guy said that he had a girlfriend, that he was sorry and that he would talk to me. Now I wasn’t aware that he had a girlfriend, the only possibility I can come up with is that it is someone out of college cos if it is someone in college then he doesn’t spend anytime with them…
So this happened on Friday, so then I waited til Monday.
So Monday I went in and someone asked me if I liked this guy and I was like what! So I'm guessing he must have told his friends… but no-one else has said anything to me so that’s ok.
Well I was expecting him to say something but I didn’t give him chance. Tuesday in a lesson he sort of walked into me, said sorry and laughed. In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!
Then today, when I had a lesson with him I was waiting outside, then he came past opened the door and sort of made a thing about putting the stopper under it as if he was waiting for me to go in. then on the bus home he was sat like nearly opposite to me but I avoided looking at him at all.
Now my problem is, could he possible like me at all? Well you cant really judge that very well.
How should I act when he is around? Sort of show that I'm interested in and things or completely avoid him?? The avoiding thing is what I've been doing up til now cos I don’t know what to do!! And I don’t really want everyone finding out if he really has got a girlfriend and is totally not interested in me.
So now that he knows that I like him its sort of just up to him, I've noticed that he ‘might’ be acting different slightly but that might just be me… and from how he’s acting its either that he is interested and just showing more or he’s turned it around and made it into a laugh sort of thing, after all he did go and tell his friends but… what do u think?
So in conclusion:
I do really like this guy, the problem being that i haven’t had a proper conversation with him so I cant go back to just the ‘friendly’ type, theres the problem with the girlfriend in which if its true then I’ll just stay well away, then the problem of what should I do now and how should I act, that’s the main ones. And I really do like him that’s why I've had to resort to help!!!
Thanks for any sensible comments!!!! and lost of help!!
Scroll to see replies
Reply 1
If he told your mate he has a gf (and you totally trust this mate to tell you the truth about what was said) then move on from him. He might feel slightly awkward round you, he might be loving the attention - either way he knows you like him and he apparently has a girlfriend.
I wouldn't read too much into however he is acting now, people act strangely all the time (and he could well have acted like this without anything having been said). Even if he is interested in you he went to the trouble of telling you he's seeing someone...which to me says he wants you to "back off" so to speak.
I wouldn't read too much into however he is acting now, people act strangely all the time (and he could well have acted like this without anything having been said). Even if he is interested in you he went to the trouble of telling you he's seeing someone...which to me says he wants you to "back off" so to speak.
Reply 3
Tarts_n_Vicars
If he told your mate he has a gf (and you totally trust this mate to tell you the truth about what was said) then move on from him. He might feel slightly awkward round you, he might be loving the attention - either way he knows you like him and he apparently has a girlfriend.
I wouldn't read too much into however he is acting now, people act strangely all the time (and he could well have acted like this without anything having been said). Even if he is interested in you he went to the trouble of telling you he's seeing someone...which to me says he wants you to "back off" so to speak.
I wouldn't read too much into however he is acting now, people act strangely all the time (and he could well have acted like this without anything having been said). Even if he is interested in you he went to the trouble of telling you he's seeing someone...which to me says he wants you to "back off" so to speak.
thanks for that,
and as for the "backing off" i was doing anything in the first place! so ive got nowhere to go anyway
hmm...creepy guy, lol...
i can derive some possible things from what you've said:
(1) he doesnt have a girlfriend, he's just lying about it to make you feel jealous (and you shouldnt be upset at him about this)
(2) if he WAS interested in you, and also provided the fact that he DOESNT have a girlfriend, he might be interested in you right now
(3) he's waiting for you to make a move
(4) "In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!" If you REALLY REALLY mean this, then I think you dont like him... If you're just saying that playfully, you more than just like him....
Try going up to him and talk to him... ask help from your female friends (ones who've had experience) on how to talk to a guy and all...lol...
Worst case scenario:
he has a girlfriend, he's not interested in you...done! You got nothing to lose
i can derive some possible things from what you've said:
(1) he doesnt have a girlfriend, he's just lying about it to make you feel jealous (and you shouldnt be upset at him about this)
(2) if he WAS interested in you, and also provided the fact that he DOESNT have a girlfriend, he might be interested in you right now
(3) he's waiting for you to make a move
(4) "In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!" If you REALLY REALLY mean this, then I think you dont like him... If you're just saying that playfully, you more than just like him....
Try going up to him and talk to him... ask help from your female friends (ones who've had experience) on how to talk to a guy and all...lol...
Worst case scenario:
he has a girlfriend, he's not interested in you...done! You got nothing to lose
Reply 5
imasillynarb
Sort out the colours and the size and i'll give it a read.
theres nothing wrong with the colours and size, at least it looks more interesting, and i cant do anything to change it now anyway, sorry, so dont worry if you dont want to read it
Reply 6
lol I knew as I was typing it that it was probably the wrong way to phrase it. Think about it this way, he might like you but he has a gf. He doesn't trust himself not to make a move (or respond if you were to make a move) so he puts it out there that he has a gf so you will lose interest (back off so to speak lol). Temptation is then out of his way.
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
Tarts_n_Vicars
lol I knew as I was typing it that it was probably the wrong way to phrase it. Think about it this way, he might like you but he has a gf. He doesn't trust himself not to make a move (or respond if you were to make a move) so he puts it out there that he has a gf so you will lose interest (back off so to speak lol). Temptation is then out of his way.
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
lol i kinda didnt think about that and i've done that before myself... nice explanation
Reply 8
anjurdsg
hmm...creepy guy, lol...
i can derive some possible things from what you've said:
(1) he doesnt have a girlfriend, he's just lying about it to make you feel jealous (and you shouldnt be upset at him about this)
(2) if he WAS interested in you, and also provided the fact that he DOESNT have a girlfriend, he might be interested in you right now
(3) he's waiting for you to make a move
(4) "In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!" If you REALLY REALLY mean this, then I think you dont like him... If you're just saying that playfully, you more than just like him....
Try going up to him and talk to him... ask help from your female friends (ones who've had experience) on how to talk to a guy and all...lol...
Worst case scenario:
he has a girlfriend, he's not interested in you...done! You got nothing to lose
i can derive some possible things from what you've said:
(1) he doesnt have a girlfriend, he's just lying about it to make you feel jealous (and you shouldnt be upset at him about this)
(2) if he WAS interested in you, and also provided the fact that he DOESNT have a girlfriend, he might be interested in you right now
(3) he's waiting for you to make a move
(4) "In another lesson my teacher said something really bad which I could kill him for!!" If you REALLY REALLY mean this, then I think you dont like him... If you're just saying that playfully, you more than just like him....
Try going up to him and talk to him... ask help from your female friends (ones who've had experience) on how to talk to a guy and all...lol...
Worst case scenario:
he has a girlfriend, he's not interested in you...done! You got nothing to lose
thnx for that!!
and going by your point number 4, it wasnt really that bad, just an awkward circumstance type of thing
Reply 9
Tarts_n_Vicars
lol I knew as I was typing it that it was probably the wrong way to phrase it. Think about it this way, he might like you but he has a gf. He doesn't trust himself not to make a move (or respond if you were to make a move) so he puts it out there that he has a gf so you will lose interest (back off so to speak lol). Temptation is then out of his way.
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
lol ok. thnx. well all i said after i knew was 'at least he knows'. and theres nothing more than that i can do given what he said
Reply 10
Tarts_n_Vicars
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
There could be a million reasons but if he didn't have the balls to come chat to you when he said he would he's not worth it
first off i was glad that he didnt actually talk to me cos i really didnt no what to expect, but now i wish he had just to see what he had to say, and it might have made things clearer... *sigh* ... oh well, i dont expect he'll bother now though...
Reply 11
well first thing you have got to remember is that even if they wont admit it, guys do like makin girls jealous.
Often the way a guy might deal with fancying you but not wanting his m8s to know is to totaly ignore you.
As for the girl friend, i am in no position to judge wether its a yes or a no... so hard to comment there.
being a guy
i can say that he may wel like you. i used to fancy a girl in my year and i didnt know what she thought of me. just like you i didnt speak to her very much, but i didnt want anyone to know my feelings for her so i used to almost ignore her more than anyone, but it was purely a weird way of hiding my feelings..
i would say theres quite a high chance he likes you, if you reali feel for him dont give up just yet! you seem sweet and thought full so you never know your luck!
Often the way a guy might deal with fancying you but not wanting his m8s to know is to totaly ignore you.
As for the girl friend, i am in no position to judge wether its a yes or a no... so hard to comment there.
being a guy
i can say that he may wel like you. i used to fancy a girl in my year and i didnt know what she thought of me. just like you i didnt speak to her very much, but i didnt want anyone to know my feelings for her so i used to almost ignore her more than anyone, but it was purely a weird way of hiding my feelings..i would say theres quite a high chance he likes you, if you reali feel for him dont give up just yet! you seem sweet and thought full so you never know your luck!
Reply 12
Anonymous
Often the way a guy might deal with fancying you but not wanting his m8s to know is to totaly ignore you.
Often the way a guy might deal with fancying you but not wanting his m8s to know is to totaly ignore you.
well he told his mates soon enough when he knew that i liked him. i think he probably told then straight away after he was told
being a guy i can say that he may wel like you. i used to fancy a girl in my year and i didnt know what she thought of me. just like you i didnt speak to her very much, but i didnt want anyone to know my feelings for her so i used to almost ignore her more than anyone, but it was purely a weird way of hiding my feelings..
i can say that he may wel like you. i used to fancy a girl in my year and i didnt know what she thought of me. just like you i didnt speak to her very much, but i didnt want anyone to know my feelings for her so i used to almost ignore her more than anyone, but it was purely a weird way of hiding my feelings..thats totally understandable i feel like that some of the time. now that i know what i know and know that he knows, i just try and avoid him... i know thats kind of stupid but yeah, well, as i said he knows
i would say theres quite a high chance he likes you, if you reali feel for him dont give up just yet!
i do really like him, sigh, but it just seems easier to give up, and well i dont know what he thinks.
you seem sweet and thought full so you never know your luck
hmm yeah, i can keep hoping, but its slowly fading away.
and thnx for everything youve said!!
Reply 14
To be honest, he's said he has a girlfriend. Unless he's a major player (in which case he's not worth the effort), he's probably not lying. I'd forget it to avoid getting hurt.
Reply 16
Not being rude but the fact that there is a problem is purely your assumption. Just talk to the guy, simple as. If he acts weird or tells you to fall of a cliff, this is a problem. If you marry him and 20 years later he cheats on you with the babysitter, this is also a problem. Your at college, that make you what, 16-17. Its just boy meets girl at this stage, just talk to him and have some fun! Don't get too serious or anything.
Good luck
Good luck
Reply 17
You poor, poor thing.
I agree with the pseudo-Catholic Vicar Girl, this boy of yours simply loves the attention. Anyone enjoys hearing that somebody likes them, perhaps he hangs about you to remind himself.
Like someone else (who? I forget) I think you should talk to him, no need to be brazen but don't let him think you some wet-lily who spends your days sighing over his hair. I think he'll take you more seriously if you talk casually to him, you might even become friends. At least that way you'll find out if he IS likeable.
Or, you could back-track, and start a conversation saying 'I'm so sorry about my friend who said I like you, he's such an awful tease, too silly of him, let's go for coffee, etc.'
I agree with the pseudo-Catholic Vicar Girl, this boy of yours simply loves the attention. Anyone enjoys hearing that somebody likes them, perhaps he hangs about you to remind himself.
Like someone else (who? I forget) I think you should talk to him, no need to be brazen but don't let him think you some wet-lily who spends your days sighing over his hair. I think he'll take you more seriously if you talk casually to him, you might even become friends. At least that way you'll find out if he IS likeable.
Or, you could back-track, and start a conversation saying 'I'm so sorry about my friend who said I like you, he's such an awful tease, too silly of him, let's go for coffee, etc.'
Reply 18
adamu
Not being rude but the fact that there is a problem is purely your assumption. Just talk to the guy, simple as. If he acts weird or tells you to fall of a cliff, this is a problem. If you marry him and 20 years later he cheats on you with the babysitter, this is also a problem. Your at college, that make you what, 16-17. Its just boy meets girl at this stage, just talk to him and have some fun! Don't get too serious or anything.
Good luck
Good luck
i understand what your saying, and you could class it as a problem as its really doing my head it. its like i want to forget about it but i cant. i would talk to him but ive been trying to do that for a couple of weeks and i just cant bring myself to do it as he's always with a group of friends or i just can think of anything at that time, a sort of mind blank. you might say that thats not very good, but you should be able to understand that. and as for where you say "just talk to him and have some fun!" thats all i want, i would even be happy just as friends even if he has got a girlfriend, he just seems a really nice guy who like to have fun!
Reply 19
Strauss
You poor, poor thing.
I agree with the pseudo-Catholic Vicar Girl, this boy of yours simply loves the attention. Anyone enjoys hearing that somebody likes them, perhaps he hangs about you to remind himself.
Like someone else (who? I forget) I think you should talk to him, no need to be brazen but don't let him think you some wet-lily who spends your days sighing over his hair. I think he'll take you more seriously if you talk casually to him, you might even become friends. At least that way you'll find out if he IS likeable.
Or, you could back-track, and start a conversation saying 'I'm so sorry about my friend who said I like you, he's such an awful tease, too silly of him, let's go for coffee, etc.'
I agree with the pseudo-Catholic Vicar Girl, this boy of yours simply loves the attention. Anyone enjoys hearing that somebody likes them, perhaps he hangs about you to remind himself.
Like someone else (who? I forget) I think you should talk to him, no need to be brazen but don't let him think you some wet-lily who spends your days sighing over his hair. I think he'll take you more seriously if you talk casually to him, you might even become friends. At least that way you'll find out if he IS likeable.
Or, you could back-track, and start a conversation saying 'I'm so sorry about my friend who said I like you, he's such an awful tease, too silly of him, let's go for coffee, etc.'
thnx, good reply.
its just the 'starting the conversation thats completely got me stuck!! i just cant seem to start anything, i know after its started I'll be ok, its just that im slightly shy when it comes to things like this, and not that i have come up against something quite like this before makes it more difficult
Related discussions
- Liverpool john moores
- Uni residence
- studying for national 5 chemistry
- Sex sounds exhausting (+ terrible anxiety)...
- Physician associate at Surrey university - september 2025
- No GCSE's and moving on to A Levels
- I can’t make my boyfriend *** and it’s ruining my self esteem
- Citric Acid, Cream of tartar Condensation Polymer
- Guy who doesn't come out of his room
- what do girls think of guys that fap a lot?
- Hills Road Catchment Area???
- Should I (20 M) break up with my boyfriend (20M) / are my new feelings genuine?
- University- Collusion Turnitin
- Reviews on KCL accommodation halls ?
- help your girl out again
- Pretty sure I've found a cancerous lump on my abdomen
- Attendance
- Mental health and wellbeing at BCU
- Uni houses
- ESAT Study Group & Advice
Latest
Trending
Last reply 2 months ago
Engineering vs. Medicine: Stuck Between Dreams and ExpectationsLast reply 2 months ago
heyyy , im new heree and im willing to have some friends xxxLast reply 2 months ago
Im 16 and never had a gf and it doesnt feel ok.
