People treat me badly because I'm ugly Watch

Anonymous #1
#1
Report Thread starter 6 years ago
#1
I'm a 16 y/o female. I do not have an aesthetically pleasing face. Guys in my year treat me horribly because of it. One guy will talk to/flirt with every other girl but will not talk to me at all. Some when talking to me make it obvious that they think less of me, and don't take me seriously. Some guys do talk to me but others completely blank me. One guy laughed at me as he entered the common room today, and has laughed at me in the past too. Another (in the year below) sniggered when I was walking towards him and past him.

There is this really beautiful girl in my year and I have observed the way guys treat her. They are very kind to her and show interest in everything she says. One day I unknowingly was blocking the way of a guy in the year above and he showed visible annoyance & said nothing to me even though I was very apologetic and moved out of the way quickly once I realised. Then another day the really pretty girl in my year blocked his way and he wasn't as annoyed & said 'It's alright' with a smile when she apologised. Other guys make it so obvious with the expressions on their faces that they think less of me.

I try to put on a brave face and wear nice clothes to suit my figure, but nice clothes doesn't compensate for my face. I try to appear confident, fake confidence and convince myself that I love myself and feel confident & it works temporarily but as soon as I arrive home I regret it and feel bad.

I'm quite lively and like to laugh but people around me don't know that inside I am breaking and wishing I could just disappear forever. I have had numerous thoughts of taking my own life and I dream to be a dentist however I lack the motivation to study sometimes because I feel sad about the way I am treated.

I try to make goals to reach and to feel happier, have bought self-esteem audiobooks and read every help article in existence etc. but inside I am constantly feeling low. I also feel so jealous when I see girls with beautiful faces.

How can I ever live a happy life in this world?
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hholbol
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#2
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Are you really as ugly as you think you are? Are you sure that these ********s aren't just making you feel worse about yourself?
Everyone wants to be beautiful but it really does come from the inside. You shouldn't focus on how "pretty" other girls are, they most definitely have their flaws too. Focus on yourself and build up your confidence.
I felt the same at one point and I tried this exercise I found on Youtube that seemed to work.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fJTDPCjnUhw
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jazzenthusiast
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:hugs:
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ChunkymunkyDJC
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When I felt like you I gave myself a mission: only look in the mirror in the morning to sort yourself out, then don't look again all day (even reflection in glass). I realised that I was wasting too much of my life caring solely about looks and that I needed to put it as far back in my mind as I could. I'm not going to lie, it wasn't a miracle cure; I still get hugely self-conscious from time to time, and I'm dealing with that, but I'm in a much better place than I once was.

One last thing: you can't be good looking to everyone. Beauty is subjective.
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PinkyQT
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Don't kill yourself.
Reason to be happy: At least you are not starving in Africa. You have a family. You must have at least 1 friends.

No offense but people don't just hate people if they are unattractive. Maybe your personality isn't too good, have fun, don't be depressed, tell jokes and be funny... you don't need to be stunning for people to like you.

Theres this girl in my class and shes not exactly beautiful but she is SOOOOOOO funny, makes me laugh... she makes even teachers laugh basically everyone loves her. Just have a better personality.
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Anonymous #2
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Attachment 174190

This guy was also depressed in his younger years, look at what he did. It's never good enough to put yourself down like that, people can be so cruel about it.
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Lee_831
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You know what - You're 16 now and you may think that you are not attractive..
I bet in a few years when you are 18/19/20, you will be more attractive than all those other girls you know, and you'll be fighting the guys off.

This isn't bs, some people mature at different times. It really has happened to most of the more 'plain' looking girls who I went to school with. They are now getting all the attention whilst the 'pretty' girls have aged horribly with all the excessive drinking / smoking that they got involved with in their late teens, and most of them are now single mothers and all that Jeremy-kyle type business..

Concentrate on your personality and keeping healthy, and go for that dream of being a dentist and making something of yourself. The rest will just fall into place, I assure you .
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lala121
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Oh that is soo sad!! Dont let it get to you! I know it can but don't be deppressed someone in this wide world will also love you!! And I myself don't make friends because they look attractive but because of their personality, intellegence and sooo many other qualities.

Be fab!!

This was posted from TSR GHETTO FABULOUS APP!
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lala121
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(Original post by PinkyQT)
Don't kill yourself.
Reason to be happy: At least you are not starving in Africa. You have a family. You must have at least 1 friends.

No offense but people don't just hate people if they are unattractive. Maybe your personality isn't too good, have fun, don't be depressed, tell jokes and be funny... you don't need to be stunning for people to like you.

Theres this girl in my class and shes not exactly beautiful but she is SOOOOOOO funny, makes me laugh... she makes even teachers laugh basically everyone loves her. Just have a better personality.
Thats right!!!!

This was posted from TSR GHETTO FABULOUS APP!
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aspiringmed
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I feel you OP.


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Beggy15
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I bet you're not ugly, I bet you're very attractive in a way that only mature boys understand! Don't worry about idiots like them they sound like babies you don't want attention off people like that


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shiinkii
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Think of it this way, at least one of those guys have jerked over you. That is a very very very true fact. Trust me, ima guy.
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Anonymous #1
#13
Report Thread starter 6 years ago
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A guy 'friend' just told me that I inherited my dad's masculine side :cry:
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Anonymous #3
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(Original post by Anonymous)
A guy 'friend' just told me that I inherited my dad's masculine side :cry:
I got told by a few guys in high school that I looked like a lesbian and they were convinced I was in love with my best friend. :rolleyes:
Guys can say stupid things sometimes.
Did you ask him why he thinks you're masculine?
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sarahjoosten
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(Original post by Anonymous)
A guy 'friend' just told me that I inherited my dad's masculine side :cry:
Give me his phone number so I can give him a piece of my mind.

No seriously I want to punch him.

What a ****


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thatonelad
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FACK THEM.

Don't let them get to you because you can only be one person - you and if they don't like it then tell them to go screw themselves.

Let me tell you miss anonymous, not everyone is going to like you in life - be it your personality or appearance. There is nothing you can do about that as you cannot jump into people's minds and change what they think. What you can do however is learn to not care what they think. This is difficult. All you have to do is tell yourself that their opinion is not important. I hope you can get through this OP.

PM me if you want, don't worry about not being anonymous I won't judge you
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rosiemaphone
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Ugh, people are so shallow it's disgusting.

I'm not going to say "I'm sure you're really pretty" Because a) I don't know what you look like and b) that shouldn't be the most important thing anyway.

whether you're physically attractive or not, the important thing is that you deserve to be treated like you're a human being, and right now, you're not. some males seem to think that the only people worthy of their attention are the ones which they want to have sex with. such a disgusting, chauvinistic point of view. I'm sure it won't make a difference, because being treated like that would hurt anyone, but you and the 'pretty' girls are being treated as objects. The only difference is that the 'attractive' ones are being treated as desirable objects, and you as undesirable. I really hope these guys grow out of this mentality soon.

And it's not that you need to "improve your personality." the people you're talking about clearly don't care what your personality is like, they'd rather spend time with a pretty rubber doll than a normal looking (which is what I'm sure you are, really) human being. Besides that, it's difficult to stay personable when you are not being treated as a person.

The only advice I can give you is this. Try really, really hard not to care what these people think. They're clearly horrible and have a depth of character which wouldn't compare favourably to an amoeba. and they're not worth the upset, although of course it's easier said than done. Also, keep searching for and spending time with the people who do treat you as a human being and like and value you for who you are. These people are much rarer than they ought to be; but once they're in your life you'll know how great it is to have them there.
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redpepper9991
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Negative self perception strms from a lack of positive reinforcement. Basically, to pyt it bluntly, if you are surrounded by knobheads who opercieve you as lower than them u will believe it. Get urself away from these groups of peicks for a while and then reflect on how u looj. I bet ur very good looking...u just gotta believe that u r
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Clone93
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I'm not going to lie, your tale to teen angst bores me. You don't see to have any real problems yet you seem so ill equipped for life. If the sniggers and apathy of a few irrelevant's leaves you feeling suicidal I doubt you'd survive real life, life outside of school. Life doesn't get easier you just have to get tougher.
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Anonymous #4
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I'm sorry you feel like that

People are given more attention and respect if they are physically attractive--this is all the more true if you are a woman.

Its unfortunate that everything is about physical appearance in our society. For the most part, you can't change your appearance. Its not your fault you didn't win an arbitrary genetic lottery.

I really do sympathise with you. I know that I can't change my appearance, so instead I decide to earn respect from others through education, through accumulating knowledge and through my career. These are things that I have more control over.

My humble advice to you would be to do the same. You have a great career goal: dentistry! I think you should focus your efforts on that and make that your strength. Being intelligent is also very attractive. No one in your year will appreciate that quality yet because they are too young to; I am guessing they are, at the most, 16 or 17? But when you are older, I am sure people will.... Good luck
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