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    Hello Everyone,

    I am hoping somebody out there can help me out cos i am only a mathmo and have no ability at these sort of things.

    Let me first explain, i am next years third team football captain and as the captains before me have been the sports reps i was asked to try and keep on the tradition.

    However the second team football captain is also going to be running for it so it could really go either way.

    I was given the advice that i should run for presidency as a joke candidate as i know i am not president material and everyone else knows i know, so people will know i am joking.

    I am a scouser (i.e. Liverpool) and have typical liverpool humour, so i am trying to use humour in a presidentail manefesto as promotion for me as sports rep, i have so far came up with http://www.garygrue.com/president.jpg but i think i could improve framework and add more humour, any help would be highly appreciated.

    The presidential elections are before the manefestos even go out for sports rep so the extra time would be great publicity if used wisely.

    Anyone that gives a significant help will be rewarded with a pint

    please remember tho i am not really trying to get president so i need to consentrate on sports more

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    Gazza
    Presidential Candidate, LOL
    Sports Rep, Hopefully
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    The bottom half is good, especially your promises, but if i may be allowed to say so, the top half could be better worded. Split up your sentences more, at the moment it reads like a speech sans punctuation. I would also consider a tag-line; how about, "Gary Grue- the Propagandists Candidate" or "Gary Grue- so crazy he might just work!"
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    That actually had me laughing! I like it!
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    there's a couple of spelling/grammar issues - i can go through them if you really want...

    to be honest, my recommendation would just to go with something like "I don't care about becoming president, in fact I wouldn't do much, but I'd have to be better than these other jokers running for it for CV points" then be rude about boaties or something. always entertaining. at the moment it's neither serious nor ridiculous, and i'd recommend going with either one or the other, since at the moment it seems too obvious that all you're doing is getting your name known for when you run for sports rep
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    I dont think you understand, i dont want the position of president, and if i make it too rediculus people might think i aint serious enought for sports rep.

    No the spelling and grammer is fine this is only a draft, it was the content that i was asking about.


    (Original post by RxB)
    there's a couple of spelling/grammar issues - i can go through them if you really want...

    to be honest, my recommendation would just to go with something like "I don't care about becoming president, in fact I wouldn't do much, but I'd have to be better than these other jokers running for it for CV points" then be rude about boaties or something. always entertaining. at the moment it's neither serious nor ridiculous, and i'd recommend going with either one or the other, since at the moment it seems too obvious that all you're doing is getting your name known for when you run for sports rep
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    (Original post by gazzag)
    I dont think you understand, i dont want the position of president, and if i make it too rediculus people might think i aint serious enought for sports rep.

    No the spelling and grammer is fine this is only a draft, it was the content that i was asking about.
    Do you know a Kit Burdin?
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    Well I do, though not Gazzag myself. He's a first year lawyer here...
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    (Original post by bigjcoool)
    Well I do, though not Gazzag myself. He's a first year lawyer here...
    Who is Kit Burdin? Probably know him if i saw his face.

    By the Way Johnny are you running for pres, if so your going to have some major compititoin in the form of rob simmons. It might be best going for vise pres, your on a 5 year course so you could always go for pres year after.

    And i also hope you vote for your TSR Friend (i.e ME) as sports rep, you just know i would be a excellent sports rep, i will be up against big comp to so all support would be highly appreciated
 
 
 
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