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Facts That Are Untrue, But Interesting. watch

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    Basically, it's similar to what Uncyclopedia contributors do, type in loads of interesting, and hopefully amusing 'facts', but they can't be accurate, in fact; the more outlandish the better. I'll start.
    • Daddylonglegs take their name from Alphonse Daddylonglegs who discovered them in 1782.
    • Human penis soup is illegal.
    • The first winner of a Summer Games Olympic gold medal for Eritrea, was one Reginald Squeakybillboard. His event? The 100m freestyle caterpillar seduction.
    • The first woman to scale Mt Everest was Aunty Maureen who lives at number 42. She reached the summit on April 3rd 1953 after a 25 min journey. At the summit she then proceeded to serve tea and cake to Tiddles, her beloved cat.
    • Richard Branson made his fortune selling lighters (5 for a pound) and white sports socks (3 pair for a pound) outside the Arndale centre
    • George Willows, owner of a 40 year old Yorkshire-based company which produces linen for Wendy Houses, has successfully sued Bill Gates for $50m for the use of the name of Microsoft.


    Hopefully, we can keep this going.
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    Human penis soup part was quite revolting.
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    This fact is false
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    ...as suggested by the title of the thread?
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    Yes I see what you mean, it is not illegal. Just that there isn't any demand for it.
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    In 1982, traces of cocaine were not found on 100% of tortoises
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    In Nineteen Dickety-Two, Mr Rutherford fired particles at gold foil to determine the nature of matter. Many passed straight through. But some were scattered. From this, he deduced all matter was made of tiny goblins, who like to play baseball. But they aren't very good.
    Further research is being conducted to determine the nature of these goblins; Are they good? Evil? Do they like cheese?
    So far, it has been determined that they do not, in fact, like cheese. But they are rather partial to both cake and noodles.
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    10 minutes ago, Jesus was born!
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    Why did you kick my dog? :[
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    (Original post by Duke Flipside)
    In Nineteen Dickety-Two, Mr Rutherford fired particles at gold foil to determine the nature of matter. Many passed straight through. But some were scattered. From this, he deduced all matter was made of tiny goblins, who like to play baseball. But they aren't very good.
    Further research is being conducted to determine the nature of these goblins; Are they good? Evil? Do they like cheese?
    So far, it has been determined that they do not, in fact, like cheese. But they are rather partial to both cake and noodles.
    :rofl:

    I see you are a simpsons fan aswell
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    (Original post by rpotter)
    :rofl:

    I see you are a simpsons fan aswell
    Who isn't??

    I'll tell you who; Hitler! The stout little Austrian invaded America with three boy scouts and a badger in 1974, in an attempt to burn all copies of Itchy and Scratchy, in retaliation for their humiliation of him.
    However, this attempt was doomed to failure, as The Simpsons was yet to be invented. Hitler was the victim of a drive-by two days after their row-boat landed in Los Angeles, and the boy scouts went on to found NASA.
    The badger moved to Mexico, where he was crowned King, but subsequently died, victim of a ninja wielding three-week-old nachos.
    It was hypothesised at the time that the ninja was an agent of Ra, the sun god, but this theory has since been discarded in favour of the idea that the ninja was really Thor, Mighty God Of Thunder, in disguise instead.
    The ninja was never traced...but then again, he wouldn't be a very good ninja if he was.
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    My input: This thread is interesting.
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    A prof. Edvard Gjunberg (silent J, N and R) has scientifically proven that love does make the world go round, and everyone knows empirical data pwns all other types, therefore stick that in ones pipe and shmoke it.
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    (Original post by Duke Flipside)
    Who isn't??

    I'll tell you who; Hitler! The stout little Austrian invaded America with three boy scouts and a badger in 1974, in an attempt to burn all copies of Itchy and Scratchy, in retaliation for their humiliation of him.
    However, this attempt was doomed to failure, as The Simpsons was yet to be invented. Hitler was the victim of a drive-by two days after their row-boat landed in Los Angeles, and the boy scouts went on to found NASA.
    The badger moved to Mexico, where he was crowned King, but subsequently died, victim of a ninja wielding three-week-old nachos.
    It was hypothesised at the time that the ninja was an agent of Ra, the sun god, but this theory has since been discarded in favour of the idea that the ninja was really Thor, Mighty God Of Thunder, in disguise instead.
    The ninja was never traced...but then again, he wouldn't be a very good ninja if he was.
    :toofunny:
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    (Original post by Axiom)
    [*]Human penis soup is illegal.
    :eek: I hope that doesn't fit into this thread.
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    How can it be a fact if it is untrue? like duh...
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    Facts have been found not to be a statement of truth. Speaking from his home in Calcutta Professor Ivan Neole said this. "Wibble pooj". Apparantly this translates to "Facts are untrue the ontly truths are lies". However this man was later delared insane after decapitating a Double Glazing Salesman with a ripr haddock.
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    I found one such example in the pseudo-authoritative publication 'Encyclopedia Judacia'; the 'facts' of which temporarily elude me, but I believe the time frame to be somewhere in the region of 1939-45.
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    In the farthest reaches of the remote mountain country known to some as France, there live an order of twenty monks. Each one practices a different form of the martial arts, and is the deadliest in his field.
    It has long been rumoured that, to join these monks, you must train in one of the twenty martial arts, and then challenge and defeat the applicable monks. However, this is not so. Instead, you must carve a throne from one of the surrounding mountains, using nought but your mind. Upon this throne you must then place a yak, who used to live on the former mountain. If you killed all the yakken with your mind-bullets, you must begin again with a new mountain.
    To this yak you must then bring a bowl of soup, made from the finest snow, earrings, and twigs. If the yak eats precisely 4.2 bowls of soup, the monks will take you in and train you as one of their own.
    When the time comes, you and all the other potential trainees will face off in single combat, to the death, until finally you challenge the master monk.
    Then he will kill you, and you will have learnt an important lesson: yaks on thrones look silly.
    That is the ultimate purpose of the monks.

    I'm in an odd mood, so from now on the first person to notice a reference to popular culture, i.e. books, music, t.v., movies, whatever, and PM me with the reference will get pos. rep. But only if it's one I was actually thinking of...or could subconciously have been thinking of, if it's a slow day...no points for coincedences I'm afraid
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    I invented the terlet.
 
 
 
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