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I hate this

I feel so down. I want to end things but I can't because there are too many people I love and can't hurt. I hate myself and I really can't see any reason why I should bother going on. Thing is, I don't feel like this all the time and I'm posting anon cos I think that if people knew who I was they'd be surprised that I feel this way.

Basically, most the time, about 75% of the time I think it would be best to end it all, but the other 25% I think of things that have gone on which make me think I should fight it. It's so confusing. Maybe I should fight, but thats really hard without support, but then I *deep down* don't want to give up cos I'm not a quitter.

Please don't suggest counselling or medication cos that doesn't work. I don't really know why I'm posting this, maybe it's to see whether other people have ever felt the same and how they're overcome it, maybe it's to just let it all out, I'm not sure. All I know is that I feel awful and need advice, as hard as it is to ask for. :frown:

I feel so selfish :bawling:

Reply 1

Apricot Fairy

Can you give us a little more information? What's your personal situation and why do you feel so miserable?

:hugs:

Ending things is never the answer. However bad things get there is always someone who is worse off and coping. I know that's a really crap, useless thing to say and it doesn't help make things any better, but what I'm trying to say is that there is always a way of improving the situation, and there's always something to look forward to.

Reply 2

strawberry

Suicide is a sin. :smile:

why won't counselling and medication work? have you tried them already? if you haven't, maybe your mind is just being closed to all suggestions. Try it before you give up on it. Life is too precious to give it up just like that. Your mom's life was on the line when she gave birth to you. There are those who love you...don't even discount that.

Reply 3

Anonymous #2

Aww @ you! :hugs:

I feel the same way, but prolly slightly busier lol so don't have time to think about it, but when I do, yeah - I can see where you're coming from :wink:

Just try to think of how sad your family and best friends (who need you! :cool:

) would feel if you did anything to sabotage your health or anything like that.

HTH.

Reply 4

CherryGarcia

You know, you will always have time to end evrth up, but you will never have an opportunity to get ur life back...Imagine if you tried to kill urself, and you are dying and there are just a few last seconds of your life and you regret what u did- your kids that u never saw, grandkids, how you are getting married,how you getting a brilliant career...etc. It may be pretty sh...ty now, but give ur life a try!!!! U will die some day anyway, why not to wait and see what happens to you? it might be very ecxiting! U never know. And think about ur mommy, and daddy, ur friends, u cant do smth like this to them, right? and if we are talking even more deeply, it was not you who gave life to urself, so u have no right to stop it. Just try to cheer up urself, it is summer soon, full of sun, may be u should get some king of trip with ur friends on a car, like around Europe?
just forget the word 'MUST' and remember the word 'WANT' do smth that u want to do not must, that will cheer u up, remember that u are making ur life, so it can be just exactly how u want it, if u try a lot. and Good luck!