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Have you ever escaped the friendzone? Watch

    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Why do you think this is - that women are not often friendzoned?
    Women often don't make the move, it's strange but even in our equal world it's still seen as a man's thing to do. So there's less chance of her getting put in the friendzone.

    Furthermore many guys are more likely to end up shagging girls they like and ruining things, whereas girls will be more likely to say we're just friends and don't want to ruin things. I think this is more a case of the fact that women usually have many more options than men and usually are approached much more often, so they're happy to turn down and remain friends whereas men take what they can get.
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    (Original post by lukas1051)
    That's because there's a difference between being a friend and being 'friendzoned'. It's a very specific situation that many guys understand, but most women do not (because the particular situation rarely happens the other way round). I have plenty of female friends, but that doesn't mean I'm in 'the friendzone'.
    What is the difference?
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    I have never. :sigh:
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Why do you think this is - that women are not often friendzoned?
    Because guys are less selective about who they have sex with than girls.
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    (Original post by death.drop)
    What is the difference?
    Friends = Both people mutually agree that their relationship is nothing more than friendship.

    Friendzone = One (person in the friend zone) wants to be/is willing to be more than friends with the other whilst the other wants nothing more than friendship.

    Guys are typically less picky so we tend to not limit women to being "just friends" (i.e. If they want something more then we're more likely to be willing to reciprocate)

    Hope this correct and clears things up
    • #3
    #3

    Me and my boyfriend were just friends for over a year before dating. He was a constant waverer in my friend zone though - sometimes he was there, sometimes I wanted something more, and I think it was the same with me for him. So I'm not sure if that counts as escaping the friend zone or not? When he asked me out he was in the friend zone though, I just decided to give him a chance for old times sake! So that's sort of escaping!
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    (Original post by death.drop)
    I really don't get this "friend zone" thing.

    I knew my first boyfriend for months before anything happened, although we had flirted since the beginning.
    My second boyfriend I knew for years before anything happened, without absolutely zero interest in him (barely even as a friend)
    my current boyfriend was a good friend for a couple of years before we got together. Out of the blue it just happened.
    there's also another friend who nothing happened with for years, then one morning after everyone had crashed at my place we ended up naked together. we hooked up a few more times and now everything is back to a normal friendship.

    relationships of all kinds are constantly changing. It's not like you get to a point where it's all just set in stone and will be that way until the end of time.
    This, tbh.

    I was just good friends with my boyfriend for something like six months before anything happened. Granted, he had a girlfriend during a lot of that time, and things did change rather quickly after he realised she was a nutter, but still. I actually hadn't considered him as anything other than a friend despite the fact that we always got on so well.

    So in my head he was definitely in the 'just friends' category for quite some while, but obviously that changed.

    I think you know when things are/aren't right...and if you're still in the friendzone, then clearly things just aren't right.
    • #4
    #4

    It is possible to escape the friendzone. I've found it's by forgetting about wanting a relationship. A friend knew I liked her as more than a friend, but at the time she put me in the friendzone. Last week, a few months after, she suggested we see each other as more than friends. Hopefully a happy ending now!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    What situation were you placed in, and how did you get out (if you did)?

    Yep, 5 years as friends, then had sex and now 3 years anniversary comin' up!
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    No, though I heard a rumour once that it was possible.
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    (Original post by SuperSaiyan)
    Yep, 5 years as friends, then had sex and now 3 years anniversary comin' up!
    you must be vegeta then...
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    yes i did
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    If you're friends with always an edge of chemistry and flirtation, but it couldn't happen at first because one/both of you were in a relationship, it can happen when circumstances change.

    However I think if you are friends for ages, and the girl sees that you never have any experiences with other girls, whilst she is getting attention and having flings/relationships with other guys, then over time she will just write you off in her head as being relationship material. She may feel slightly sorry for you but she won't think of you as having enough value and won't want to be the only girl that shows interest in you.
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    Think it is quite common for girls to be unsure what they want for a time and then, at a point, make a decision in your favour. But once the 'just friends' phase is uttered I think the prognosis is very poor....
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    (Original post by lukas1051)
    Nope, you're in there for life. There are only three things that can happen once you're in the friendzone

    1) You accept the friendzone, move on, and no longer attempt to get anywhere romantically (either not seeing her again, or seeing her as a genuine friend)
    2) You continue to spend time with her, allowing yourself to slide further into the pit that is the friendzone, until you can't take it anymore and you end up severely heartbroken after telling her how you feel
    3) She eventually gets together with you out of pity or desperation and it falls apart incredibly quickly because it's built on no foundations

    If you think you might have been friendzoned then you probably have. Best bet is to aim for option 1.
    Hmm, I've been with my boyfriend for nearly 8 months. We started out as friends...
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    (Original post by lukas1051)
    That's because there's a difference between being a friend and being 'friendzoned'. It's a very specific situation that many guys understand, but most women do not (because the particular situation rarely happens the other way round). I have plenty of female friends, but that doesn't mean I'm in 'the friendzone'.
    I have seen some female friends friendzoned in a slightly different where she is keen a he, with some reservations, embarks on a ons and afterwards has the 'just good friends' talk. Hasn't gone down too well from what I've seen. From a male perspective I think I would still find it better than complete rejection and friendzoning!
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    If you want to escape this friend zone you speak of, all you have to do is make a move. The only times you're going to find yourself in the friend zone is if you're shy about getting it on, if you're really unattractive, or if the chick you're into is a lesbian. I don't always mean unattractive looks wise I just mean that you have a way about yourself that is repulsive to the woman.
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    Watch the sitcom Friends. Chandler and Monica, Ross n Rachel. Even Joey and Rachel hook up and Ross and Rachel make out and almost hook up if they weren't walked in on by the rest. Not that I base life on a sitcom of course. :ninja:
    • #5
    #5

    I hung out with this guy and he was really nice to me,complimentary etc..but I never realised they were dates,or that he liked me,until we got into an argument,and he said that he liked me but I treated him like a friend so he began to get over me,then I realised I liked him,told him and he said he thinks its better if we just go our separate ways as he cant deal with that.So he got out of the 'friendzone' by breaking the whole thing off.
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    If you've escaped the friendzone, you were probably never truly in the friendzone in the first place.
 
 
 
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