Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

I'm a cool guy, but unattractive Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    For a long time, I have been deluding myself into thinking that I was good looking. But I am not. Many people don't say it to my face, rather they hint at it, if you get my drift.

    Basically, I am going through a lot of cosmetic surgery. I recently had my jaw reset; this has improved my appearance slightly. But My side profile is quite bad; I have a large hump on my nose, and my chin is recessed. My eyes are also droopy.

    Now the problem I am having is that many girls find me very interesting, quirky, and funny. I often get told I am really really cool and I do get complimented for the way I dress. But when it comes down to it, they just are not attracted. I try to bat in my league, but even then, the girls are picky. Sure there are areas I can walk on - mainly my body.

    I am currently very depressed about this. I am in my 20s, and I feel like I have a lot to offer to a woman in a relationship, but because I am not attractive enough (and somewhat geeky), girls will never look beyond it. And I will constantly be playing second fiddle to the really good looking guys. Who from hanging out with - have no problems attracting.

    I have my large cosmetic surgery in a few months time. So I was wondering if anyone on here, has gone through this?

    Cheers.
    Offline

    15
    ReputationRep:
    It's typically women who insist that personality is far greater in significance than physical appearance.

    Hold them to their words :sexface:
    Offline

    21
    Forget about attracting girls for now. Just wait until your surgery is over as your chances will massively improve if its done right. Even you wouldnt date a minger, right?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Laomedeia)
    Forget about attracting girls for now. Just wait until your surgery is over as your chances will massively improve if its done right. Even you wouldnt date a minger, right?
    Well, I have slept with a really fat girl before. And dated a girl, who dumped me as soon as she became hot. (I liked her personality a lot.)

    And yes, I thought about this, but it is really depressing. Basically, I feel that my quality of life is being affected just because of the way I look.
    Offline

    21
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well, I have slept with a really fat girl before. And dated a girl, who dumped me as soon as she became hot. (I liked her personality a lot.)

    And yes, I thought about this, but it is really depressing. Basically, I feel that my quality of life is being affected just because of the way I look.

    Oh OK. Nothing wrong with that but not every man would. Its down to personal preference and its a matter of chance whether you meet someone that "prefers you" so to speak.
    Look at it this way if Jeremy Clarkson can get a wife then theres a good chance you can.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    I think it's awful you feel like you've had to resort to surgery purely to attract girls.

    What I've found is, no matter what you look like, there's always some people that will find you incredibly attractive.

    And what's wrong with being nerdy? If you go for girls with your interests, it's hardly a problem!

    Good luck with the surgery!

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Sheldor)
    I think it's awful you feel like you've had to resort to surgery purely to attract girls.

    What I've found is, no matter what you look like, there's always some people that will find you incredibly attractive.

    And what's wrong with being nerdy? If you go for girls with your interests, it's hardly a problem!

    Good luck with the surgery!

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Well - there is nothing wrong with being nerdy, but it is getting awfully tiring hearing girls saying "you are a great guy, but no". Only for them to hook up with my much hotter friends.
    Offline

    6
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    For a long time, I have been deluding myself into thinking that I was good looking. But I am not. Many people don't say it to my face, rather they hint at it, if you get my drift.

    Basically, I am going through a lot of cosmetic surgery. I recently had my jaw reset; this has improved my appearance slightly. But My side profile is quite bad; I have a large hump on my nose, and my chin is recessed. My eyes are also droopy.

    Now the problem I am having is that many girls find me very interesting, quirky, and funny. I often get told I am really really cool and I do get complimented for the way I dress. But when it comes down to it, they just are not attracted. I try to bat in my league, but even then, the girls are picky. Sure there are areas I can walk on - mainly my body.

    I am currently very depressed about this. I am in my 20s, and I feel like I have a lot to offer to a woman in a relationship, but because I am not attractive enough (and somewhat geeky), girls will never look beyond it. And I will constantly be playing second fiddle to the really good looking guys. Who from hanging out with - have no problems attracting.

    I have my large cosmetic surgery in a few months time. So I was wondering if anyone on here, has gone through this?

    Cheers.
    Are your initials SC by any chance?
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by raaachek)
    Are your initials SC by any chance?
    No.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by raaachek)
    Are your initials SC by any chance?
    I know who you are talking about
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Fail.
    • #2
    #2

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    For a long time, I have been deluding myself into thinking that I was good looking. But I am not. Many people don't say it to my face, rather they hint at it, if you get my drift.

    I am currently very depressed about this. I am in my 20s, and I feel like I have a lot to offer to a woman in a relationship, but because I am not attractive enough (and somewhat geeky), girls will never look beyond it. And I will constantly be playing second fiddle to the really good looking guys. Who from hanging out with - have no problems attracting.

    I have my large cosmetic surgery in a few months time. So I was wondering if anyone on here, has gone through this?

    Cheers.
    I've been doing this. Today though when I was trying clothes on in a changing room I realised how ugly and just disgusting I am. Didn't help that when I got home my dad said "what's the fatty doing in here?" I'm not sure whether it was a joke or not but I'm feeling like crap now.

    It doesn't help that I'm 18 and I've never even been kissed by a boy, it all makes sense now. I was so naive to believe the compliments I've had in the past.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Personally if I liked a guys personality I wouldn't be put off by looks, its sad that you should feel the need to have surgery but maybe afterwards the boost in confidence will be good for you. And I actually find a guy being a bit nerdy attractive and I know a lot of other people who would say the same, a lot of girls care about much more than whether or not they think someone's hot, don't give up hope
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    For a long time, I have been deluding myself into thinking that I was good looking. But I am not. Many people don't say it to my face, rather they hint at it, if you get my drift.

    Basically, I am going through a lot of cosmetic surgery. I recently had my jaw reset; this has improved my appearance slightly. But My side profile is quite bad; I have a large hump on my nose, and my chin is recessed. My eyes are also droopy.

    Now the problem I am having is that many girls find me very interesting, quirky, and funny. I often get told I am really really cool and I do get complimented for the way I dress. But when it comes down to it, they just are not attracted. I try to bat in my league, but even then, the girls are picky. Sure there are areas I can walk on - mainly my body.

    I am currently very depressed about this. I am in my 20s, and I feel like I have a lot to offer to a woman in a relationship, but because I am not attractive enough (and somewhat geeky), girls will never look beyond it. And I will constantly be playing second fiddle to the really good looking guys. Who from hanging out with - have no problems attracting.

    I have my large cosmetic surgery in a few months time. So I was wondering if anyone on here, has gone through this?

    Cheers.
    Do not do this to yourself. Firstly looks aren't everything, you probably are better looking than you think, that are very few "ugly" people about.
    Offline

    13
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Well - there is nothing wrong with being nerdy, but it is getting awfully tiring hearing girls saying "you are a great guy, but no". Only for them to hook up with my much hotter friends.
    That probably just means you don't have chemistry rather than looks. That's a very generic line people use that can mean all manner of things, and doesn't mean you aren't attractive.

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    For a long time, I have been deluding myself into thinking that I was good looking. But I am not. Many people don't say it to my face, rather they hint at it, if you get my drift.

    Basically, I am going through a lot of cosmetic surgery. I recently had my jaw reset; this has improved my appearance slightly. But My side profile is quite bad; I have a large hump on my nose, and my chin is recessed. My eyes are also droopy.

    Now the problem I am having is that many girls find me very interesting, quirky, and funny. I often get told I am really really cool and I do get complimented for the way I dress. But when it comes down to it, they just are not attracted. I try to bat in my league, but even then, the girls are picky. Sure there are areas I can walk on - mainly my body.

    I am currently very depressed about this. I am in my 20s, and I feel like I have a lot to offer to a woman in a relationship, but because I am not attractive enough (and somewhat geeky), girls will never look beyond it. And I will constantly be playing second fiddle to the really good looking guys. Who from hanging out with - have no problems attracting.

    I have my large cosmetic surgery in a few months time. So I was wondering if anyone on here, has gone through this?

    Cheers.


    Man, please listen to this advice:


    Do not let the anxiety about how you look affect your self-esteem! You can always change how you look but a bubbly extroverted personality type truly is a gift.



    Also, I know a girl who had her jaw reset and at first it seemed odd, unsightly even, but it turned out to be a big success. Make sure you wash and dress nicely aswell obv.

    Good luck, pal.

    Edit: Looks are (dispite what people say) obviously important when people are looking for a partner and it is in our nature to think this way. However, guys have a big advantage in that a confident personality and a good social standing can go a long way with nagating this and it sounds as if you have these things, so guard them well my friend. And just keep working on your looks which will deffo pay off in the end, GL.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    though physical attraction is really important in a relationship, that doesn't mean that only attractive people are in relationships... if you look around you, there are so many people in relationships who are not conventionally attractive. Personally, I've fallen for guys who weren't particularly attractive, but had brilliant personalities like you which beautified them in my eyes. I think girls are a lot more likely to like you despite your looks, which may not even be as bad as you think, so you're luckier than a girl would be in your situation! but anyway, good luck, and don't get too down! You'll find someone
    Offline

    10
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe you're attractive but you're just being insecure? Do you like what you see in the mirror? Chances are if you like your pictures/reflection then other people do also.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    Maybe you should post a pic of your face as I think cosmetic surgery is a bit far?

    Posted from TSR Mobile
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    To be fair it's probably that you're, as you said, nerdy. You said you dress well but are you going for whole geek look? Buttoned up shirts, cardigans and rimmed glasses? Drop that if you are...
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: January 8, 2013
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Would you like to hibernate through the winter months?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.