So in year 9 I was bullied by some girls who were my friends but they spread a rumour that I was saying things about the skin colour of another friend of mine. I told her that I didn't say anything of such nature at all, in fact I was pretty quiet and didn't really like gossiping and for that reason they found me boring, so to get rid of me they felt they had to lie and belittle me in order for me to distance myself. I know this because one of the girls is now an acquaintance of mine and told me how unfair she found the ordeal yet she felt compelled to go along with them.
Anyway, ever since that pathetic experience I've just not had an interest in keeping friends. In year 10 there was a girl who was part of another group of friends and an older girl and my ex-group of friends were bullying her, so I had enough and told her to 'back off and stop being so pathetic' and then I walked away. So this girl said thank you to me and we became really good friends. We still are good friends, I don't like the term best friend but if I had to consider anyone as a best friend then it'd be her. She thinks likewise. Now we probably talk once a week or meet up once a month as we're at different points in our lives (we're both 20) and she's got a boyfriend and some friends that she hangs out with which is perfectly fine.
But I just don't like making any friends. It's not like I'm anti-social, I have had conversations with people and they have asked me to come out for a coffee or meet up as they find me interesting but I feel to some extent they are probably doing it out of kindness rather than being genuine. I prefer to spend time alone reading a book or getting involved in political debates etc. As far as boyfriends go, I've never been interested in a guy either except one in particular which fell through due to him being so immature. The guys that I've met have always been boring with little interest in anything other than hot girls and sports. The guys who are more academic turn out to be way too geeky (not that it's a bad thing but then there comes a point where I will play Assassins Creed, they'll probably know the soundtrack to Black Ops and I'm like.. wat..)
I dunno, is this normal? How do I work on trust issues? Am I just too picky?
I don't want friends, but I feel to get ahead in this world of consumerism and materialism I need to be able to network and socialise more and have a good support network. My sisters find it ridiculous and bewildering that I actually enjoy my own company lol. Please tell me I'm not the only one. =/
No interest in having friends. Watch
- Thread Starter
- 05-01-2013 19:26
- 06-01-2013 00:14
Actually the stig thrives on isolation. It is unknown whether the stig is human or not tho.
- 07-01-2013 02:06
I completely understand enjoying your own company, but also that it's hard to be accepted.
I am very happy in my own company, but my family make me feel really bad about it. My mum is always buying me things 'to share with my university friends', my Dad is always asking who my friends are, and if they want to come over, and my sister is always asking why I haven't got a boyfriend yet, and saying that once I've left university it will be too late. It just makes me feel like ****.
One thing I would say is that however you feel by yourself;
1. People do see people with no friends as 'weird'.
2. Very few people whe end up completely alone are happy.
These are harsh truths, but I would say that it is worth investing in casual friendships, even if you 'don't like making friends' - you will still have time to yourself. I personally find it hard, but if you don't then you are lucky. I also think it unlikely that every guy you know can be divided into 'jock' or 'geek'. There are nice and interesting people out there. What about a debating society or something?