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    (Original post by Parente)
    I don't understand why people are doing this?? What do you actually gain? I think restraining from porn would be a better idea rather than not fapping at all! I'm not ashamed to say that I probably wouldn't be able to last longer than 2 weeks without tossing one off haha. I'd prefer to have a higher drive...
    See the original post for the reported benefits. I'm doing it for a test of self-discipline.
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    (Original post by Slothsftws)
    And why should anyone believe you?
    Why shouldn't they believe me?

    I have no reason to lie; I gain absolutely nothing from it. There are plenty of similar anecdotes online which report similar benefits from it.

    I encourage people to try and experiment themselves, and if they don't think it's for them, that's absolutely fine. I just can't stand ignorant people who mock things without having experienced it themselves.
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    (Original post by Parente)
    I don't understand why people are doing this?? What do you actually gain? I think restraining from porn would be a better idea rather than not fapping at all! I'm not ashamed to say that I probably wouldn't be able to last longer than 2 weeks without tossing one off haha. I'd prefer to have a higher drive...
    If you can stay away from porn but continue to fap then absolutely do that. A lot of guys have strong links between porn and fapping and they almost always use porn to fap to. If you don't fap then you won't use porn.

    Also, not fapping helps restore sensitivity to your dopamine receptors which have been dulled by porn. A lot of people have reported quicker recovery from porn addiction by avoiding fapping too. It's really up to you how you decide to approach things. Personally I enjoy the test of willpower not to fap; I don't like the idea of being controlled by my urges.
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    (Original post by Valdo)
    Of course you can! But the thread starter is off on a weeks ban I think, so he wont be able to add you on the list right away.
    Thanks

    (Original post by KatieMM)
    Yes of course :rolleyes:. The guys are a long way ahead, we urgently need more girls. Plus, I'm finding it hard to stick with this. More girls sharing no-strumming tips would be a big help
    Well, okay this is going to be kind of long. The reasoning for me wanting to do this is a bit more deep-rooted more than to see whether I can do it or not. When I broke up with my ex over a year ago I decided that I wasn't going to have sex until I was married, for a variety of reasons. I felt that I let my emotions be too heavily influenced by him, and I want to learn to get in control of my emotions, and let sex signify the ultimate act of love, for when I'm married. Therefore I haven't had sex since September 2011.

    I'm also undergoing a lifestyle change. Late 2010 I decided to go gluten free after getting severe stomach pains. I wasn't classed as being coeliac, but after I started it, I felt so much better! I think carbohydrates clog your system up. I started becoming far more interested in health and diet through instagram and blogs, and now I have overhauled my diet I'm in a lot better shape, and feel like I have more energy and not weighed down by food. I also make sure I walk at least 3km a day. I also don't drink alcohol, and I haven't since 2010, I don't smoke, or take drugs.

    Masturbation, for me has come to feel like a crutch. I think because I don't drink, smoke, take drugs, go to clubs, it's become the last sort of thing that I feel has no benefit in my life. I understand that sex has a great benefit, and I will have it when I'm married. But masturbation, has become something that left me feeling lonely! Afterwards I didn't have someone to turn to, it felt like I was trying to make myself falsely create the feeling of sex, which I guess essentially it is, and I dunno, just came to the conclusion of that. I actually came to the conclusion I didn't want to masturbate anymore a few months ago, but never followed through with it. I definitely 'cut down' to once every 3/4 weeks, but now I want to completely stop it.

    I understand the need for sexual expression is incredibly important, but again I now believe thats for marriage, when sexual expression is 'right'.

    In terms for coping without masturbating, I believe you need to channel that intense feeling into something else. I've started trying to do yoga videos from Youtube, to try and control my mind. Because I believe that that is a skill that really needs improving on, to be able to control your thoughts. There is an app for mindfulness, and there is several CD's out there that you can do everyday for 20 minutes to improve being able to handle just having you and your mind. Also simply getting out the door and running as hard as you can works, or getting up and tidying your room, or organising something, which takes your full attention.

    If you're tempted to watch porn, come on this website and read through a debate thread which requires you to think about your opinion, or go on facebook and read updates, something that takes a period of time sufficiently long so that the thought of going to porn will go out of your head.

    All the things that I'm doing aren't really for religious reasons. I was christened C of E, but I try and draw positive aspects of other religions that I like into my life. So for example, I got yoga from Buddhism, I like how the Mormon religion places great importance upon Family, that families are forever. I spend a lot of time with my family.

    I dunno.. if you do this for just to see if you can do it, you will probably struggle for the fact that you don't have anything that you can draw your mind to to remind yourself why you are doing it, but if you do have reasons and a foundation for abstaining then you have something you can remind yourself of, and abstaining will fit into your lifestyle better, it won't be such an abstract thing.
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    (Original post by miser)
    As expected from a bibliomaniac. :awesome:

    Whereas Aristotle, Russell, Schopenhauer, etc., would not.

    And perhaps the point of that book was that one shouldn't listen to the advice of Lord Henry.
    I'm not undermining the philosophies of history's many scholars. I'm just saying, in terms of fapping, unless there are any explicit adverse health effects, why not just do it? You'll die one day, but at least you would die with sexual satisfaction.

    Lord Henry is my homeboy, Dorian was just a dumbass.
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    (Original post by Bibliomaniac)
    I'm not undermining the philosophies of history's many scholars. I'm just saying, in terms of fapping, unless there are any explicit adverse health effects, why not just do it? You'll die one day, but at least you would die with sexual satisfaction.

    Lord Henry is my homeboy, Dorian was just a dumbass.
    My thoughts on why hedonism isn't a valid philosophy are laid out here: http://journalofinterest.com/essays/meaning-of-life/ and here: http://journalofinterest.com/essays/...h-over-nature/

    Totally agree about Lord Henry and Dorian.
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    (Original post by miser)
    My thoughts on why hedonism isn't a valid philosophy are laid out here: http://journalofinterest.com/13/the-...g-of-life.html and here: http://journalofinterest.com/5/man%2...er-nature.html
    Which paragraphs are limited to hedonism? I'm not reading through that, we've obviously reached an impasse.

    http://news.menshealth.com/masturbat...ay/2011/12/29/

    ^^ It's not even hedonism anymore, it's a matter of health. I'm telling you, the schlong wants some lovin'
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    Why when I go to click on this in my watched threads widget is this in the recycle bin?
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    (Original post by insignificant)
    x
    Wow, your attitude towards ruthlessly expunging from your life everything that detracts from it is inspirational. Thanks for posting.

    Also, I am one of the ones who is doing it purely to see if I can. The fact that this makes it almost impossibly difficult is why it makes a good challenge. Easy challenges are boring.
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    (Original post by insignificant)
    Why when I go to click on this in my watched threads widget is this in the recycle bin?
    The debate was pretty heated and turned into quite an argument between 'Slothsftws' and plenty of fapstronauts.

    I applaud the mod who removed those posts for taking out just a chunk and letting the thread continue as opposed to deleting the whole thread. They are obviously aware it's not one big troll thread, things just got a bit out of hand.
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    (Original post by miser)
    .
    http://journalofinterest.com/13/the-...g-of-life.html Your meaning of life essay is really interesting reading. Glad I spotted that.
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    (Original post by miser)
    Wow, your attitude towards ruthlessly expunging from your life everything that detracts from it is inspirational. Thanks for posting.

    Also, I am one of the ones who is doing it purely to see if I can. The fact that this makes it almost impossibly difficult is why it makes a good challenge. Easy challenges are boring.
    A challenge is a challenge nonetheless! Can you imagine how some of my early decisions to make my life better for me were? Very hard! But they get easier the more you see the bigger picture. Once you gain a great understanding, and get a greater perspective through the trials and tribulations you will face doing this, the easier it will become

    I'd also like to add that, these changes came about because I just had a gut feeling everything in my life was wrong. I recognised what in my life I wanted to change, and I did. It's why people who go on 'a diet' 'to lose weight' often fail because they are such broad terms and 'diets' never work. It's about changing your lifestyle to become healthier so that the signs of ill health (extra weight on you, shortness of breath, not being able to exercise for long) disappear. Just doing it to lose weight never works because you don't recognise the thing as a whole.

    You'll learn I tend to rant/preach (without realising) a lot haha.


    (Original post by RichyFrench)
    The debate was pretty heated and turned into quite an argument between 'Slothsftws' and plenty of fapstronauts.

    I applaud the mod who removed those posts for taking out just a chunk and letting the thread continue as opposed to deleting the whole thread. They are obviously aware it's not one big troll thread, things just got a bit out of hand.
    Ah right okay, I panicked for a second that the whole thing had been deleted! thanks
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    (Original post by Sam00)
    I'm really struggling with this lately - I set myself the target of being productive, but always end up fapping.

    After I feel mildly depressed like there's no point being productive, a loss of motivation.
    Yeah loads of people get the 'post-fap blues'. I feel really demotivated and lethargic after fapping, I have no real desire to do anything. I never get that after sex, only fapping.

    Sex leads me to feel happy afterwards, like I've just thoroughly enjoyed what I've been doing. I feel like nothing can stop me. The difference is worlds apart. If it's meaningless sex though I don't really get those great feelings.
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    (Original post by Bibliomaniac)
    Which paragraphs are limited to hedonism? I'm not reading through that, we've obviously reached an impasse.
    And I thought you were a reader.

    First link:
    Spoiler:
    Show
    Another popular suggestion is that our purpose is to be happy, live hedonically or accomplish some personal ambition. If this were truly so, it would be a perfectly rational decision to kill oneself and save oneself the trouble. This isn't to say that these purposes aren't legitimate, only that they lead to a conclusion that seems contrary to other beliefs we're likely to hold, and in that case must be critically examined and some beliefs dropped in order to alleviate the contradiction. In this scenario, the only reason you need to achieve this purpose is because you are alive, permitting us to simplify matters.[3]

    So, being that we have eliminated intended purpose and subjective purpose, if we're to have anything to call a purpose, we need to decide it for ourselves. In order to do this, we need to discover something that is existentially worthwhile — by which I mean it must have some external significance. It must, in some sense, matter whether or not we meet our purpose, or else it's simply trivial and not purposeful. Another way of saying this is that it must matter from some external perspective.

    The only external perspectives we know of are other conscious creatures on Earth — humans and animals. What matters to humans and animals, who exist independently of you? What matters to these creatures whom your life can either benefit or not? What matters to them, of course, is the happiness and well-being of themselves and their loved ones. In a phrase, what matters to them is their quality of life, which is dependent on these things.

    Having reached this point, the immediate conclusion to be drawn is that the only real meaning available is to commit actions that benefit others.[4] By benefitting others, you seal for yourself indisputable meaning for your existence, etched singularly into the fabric of the universe for eternity. By affecting the experience of others, your life can unequivocally be said to have mattered — mattered to the degree that your actions impacted events for others in universal history.

    In a word, our purpose is compassion.[5] Personal ambition, selfishness, greed — we can recognise these as dead ends, only mattering for the brief time you're alive. Being a slave to one's ego rears its head as probably one of the lowest achievements available for a person; in universal time, it will have made no difference whatever, save to benefit a single person in the ancient past.

    Notes

    3. The suggestion that the purpose of life is to live for oneself is criticised further in Man's Final Triumph over Nature. 'Rational suicide', as I called it, would seem to be the appropriate response to such a scenario, being that it is hard work to be happy (or to live pleasurably), and most people only succeed at it partially. Better is to remove the requirement for it.
    4. Astute readers might recognise that this is just a macro version of living to benefit oneself. In this case, by removing all consciousness everywhere, we also remove all requirement for benefitting them. Being that this is impractical, I dismiss it, though should circumstances change, it could be considered.
    5. There's a risk of conflating 'purpose' and 'meaning' in this essay, though I think they're sufficiently close to use them similarly. If treated distinctly, it'd be enough to say that the only meaning to be had is in benefitting others.


    Second link:
    Spoiler:
    Show
    We can see that hedonism incorporates humanity's perpetual quest for the gratification of the self, and this would appear to necessarily advocate the legitimacy of hedonism as a philosophy, but I'd like to submit my thoughts as to why this isn't the case. Hedonism, in a traditional sense, can be noted as being a reaction to the mundanity of living — its purpose lies in the distraction of oneself from the purposelessness of the world around us. In the case of those who'd unwittingly apply themselves to the gratification of instinct, it's not a reaction but rather it represents man's default behaviour; separately, in the case of the self-identified hedonist, a person's actions are the result of the lack of a clearly defined purpose. In both cases, however, the individuals are engaging in wilful distraction — either from a discovered sense of purposelessness, or, indeed, from the inability to recognise that purposelessness. Simply, these behaviours are what's left in the absence of a true 'higher calling'. Hedonism isn't a means to an end, but rather it's intended as the end itself. Individuals often accept the importance of the pleasure and happiness in others as equally as important as the individual's own, and this thinking is the origin of secular humanism.[4]

    [...]

    The second outcome is that of what could be termed 'rational suicide'. When an individual has applied rational introspection to its fullest degree, they must inevitably confront the ideas that I've expressed here. Where commonly suicide is a result of environmental or subjective factors such as the inability to cope with pain or sadness, 'rational suicide' represents the idea of suicide as the result of such a rational introspection, occuring when an individual has recognised that seeking happiness and pleasure is itself a reaction to the purposelessness of existence, and that to seek it is therefore an attempt at the rejection of reality itself; when one recognises that the will to live is also a product of innate bias for the fear of death; when one sees that the satisfaction of instinct holds no other purpose other than to justify existence. All forms of hedonism become unveiled to be a distraction of oneself from this purposelessness, and one may realise that the removal of that towards which we distract ourselves necessarily negates the very purposefulness of that distraction, hence the pursuit of life for life's sake must be denied.[8] Without reason to exist, the transition into non-existence can't be said to be important. There can be said to be no reason to do anything, and for that reason we're left to do nothing.

    Notes

    4. I wouldn't advocate the view that early secular humanists thought this explicitly, only that secular humanism is the attempt to maximise the well-being of mankind in the absence of divine purpose, essentially driving us towards a communal hedonism of the sort to be explained in the following paragraph.
    8. Or, at least, continued living would be inelegant in exactly the same way as is an unsimplified equation — both sides could better be cancelled out.


    (Original post by Bibliomaniac)
    http://news.menshealth.com/masturbat...ay/2011/12/29/

    ^^ It's not even hedonism anymore, it's a matter of health. I'm telling you, the schlong wants some lovin'
    That link's been bandied about the thread a few times. Some have dismissed it, personally I don't care so much even if it was true. It's only for 1 year.
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    (Original post by RichyFrench)
    http://journalofinterest.com/13/the-...g-of-life.html Your meaning of life essay is really interesting reading. Glad I spotted that.
    Thanks. I find that writing helps organise my thoughts. Glad you enjoyed it.
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    @ Insignificant, I admire you for what you're doing, especially as I don't think I'd have the strength. Cutting out masturbation is hard enough for me when I know I'm only ever a few weeks away from the man I love going down on me, if I had to be totally orgasm-free I think I'd go crazy.

    Still, there are plenty of guys here who've stopped fapping despite being single, and if guys can do it then I guess it should be possible for girls too. I admire you for it
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    (Original post by insignificant)
    A challenge is a challenge nonetheless! Can you imagine how some of my early decisions to make my life better for me were? Very hard! But they get easier the more you see the bigger picture. Once you gain a great understanding, and get a greater perspective through the trials and tribulations you will face doing this, the easier it will become
    Yes, absolutely. Personally I love taking on challenges like this, trying to improve myself. The very idea of not meeting my potential (whatever it is) grates against my soul whenever I permit myself to think about it.

    (Original post by insignificant)
    I'd also like to add that, these changes came about because I just had a gut feeling everything in my life was wrong. I recognised what in my life I wanted to change, and I did. It's why people who go on 'a diet' 'to lose weight' often fail because they are such broad terms and 'diets' never work. It's about changing your lifestyle to become healthier so that the signs of ill health (extra weight on you, shortness of breath, not being able to exercise for long) disappear. Just doing it to lose weight never works because you don't recognise the thing as a whole.

    You'll learn I tend to rant/preach (without realising) a lot haha.
    Yeah - you need specifics. You need real goals that you either achieve or fail, to which all the actions of your life either conform to or don't. You need to know exactly what you want - the big picture - or else you'll never get it. Nice thoughts.
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    (Original post by KatieMM)
    @ Insignificant, I admire you for what you're doing, especially as I don't think I'd have the strength. Cutting out masturbation is hard enough for me when I know I'm only ever a few weeks away from the man I love going down on me, if I had to be totally orgasm-free I think I'd go crazy.

    Still, there are plenty of guys here who've stopped fapping despite being single, and if guys can do it then I guess it should be possible for girls too. I admire you for it
    No worries Thankyou Again, it's all down to mind control. Maybe setting yourself targets, NOT REWARDS, but targets to reach. Don't ever reward yourself for not masturbating because then you won't ever train your mind to do it properly, you'll live from reward to reward. Maybe 3-month 6-month 9-month and 12-month milestones can be celebrated as points you have achieved to, to look back on and look how well you have done. Maybe get a jumper you couldn't justify buying, or some expensive chocolate or something. But don't give yourself immediate rewards for every time you overcome not masturbating.

    It's what I intend on doing, just a suggestion, I'm not dictating, I'm aware the way I type can sound imposing, I just ramble. Okay I'll shut up now! haha
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    Can someone add me to the OP as well? Stopped fapping since December 25th and the urge is starting to diminish

    Really need to work on talking to some girls though, that's going to be much harder
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    4 weeks today, yeahhhhh buddy

    Crass suggestion, but; pairing off singles of the no-fap society for sexytime? LMAO

    lets all help eachother out haha :laugh:
 
 
 
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