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V531 - Burns Night Celebration Bill watch

  • View Poll Results: Should this bill be passed into law?
    As many are of the opinion, Aye
    32.35%
    On the contrary, No
    35.29%
    Abstain
    32.35%

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    V531 - Burns Night Celebration Bill, Stiff Little Fingers, Barnetlad


    Burns Night Celebration Bill 2013

    A Bill to encourage celebration of the birth of one of the great British Bards – Robert Burns.

    BE IT ENACTED by The Queen's most Excellent Majesty, by and with the advice and consent of the Commons in this present Parliament assembled, in accordance with the provisions of the Parliament Acts 1911 and 1949, and by the authority of the same, as follows:-

    Part 1: Haggis
    1. All citizens must eat haggis, neeps and tatties for Burns Night supper.
    (i) Exceptions will be made in the case of allergies or vegetarianism.
    2. Citizens who do not comply with this will be sentenced to 10 hours of bagpipe music.

    Part 2: Freedom
    3. Upon leaving work or school, everyone must shout "Freedom!”
    4. Anyone who does not do so is sentenced to 5 drams of whisky.

    Part 3: Auld Lang Syne
    5. All work days and lessons begin with a rendition of Auld Lang Syne.
    6. Refusal to do so results in a sentence of 3 deep-fried Mars Bars.

    Part 4: Miscellaneous
    7. This bill shall be known as the Scottish Cliché Bill.
    8. This bill shall extent to the United Kingdom.
    9. This bill shall commence immediately.
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    A typical English ******* mockery of our finest bard! Nay, I say, in the name of Scott, Burns, and Caledonia's finest! Bannockburn... something something Scotland the Brave.
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    (Original post by Rhadamanthus)
    A typical English ******* mockery of our finest bard! Nay, I say, in the name of Scott, Burns, and Caledonia's finest! Bannockburn... something something Scotland the Brave.
    I am Scottish boyo.
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    (Original post by Stiff Little Fingers)
    I am Scottish boyo.
    Whaur fae?
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    (Original post by Rhadamanthus)
    Whaur fae?
    Family are from Cowdenbeath.
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    (Original post by Stiff Little Fingers)
    Family are from Cowdenbeath.
    Not too far from me then. (As for the translation, I've always maintained that the difference between English and Scots is a typo.)
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    (Original post by Rhadamanthus)
    Not too far from me then. (As for the translation, I've always maintained that the difference between English and Scots is a typo.)
    I wouldn't think so, often end up with a trip over to Edinburgh when visiting them.

    Well either way, someone butchers the language
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    As an Ulster-Scot, aye aye aye!

    I will however not be eating haggis but happily accept the punishment.
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    The Noes have it! The Noes have it! Unlock!
 
 
 
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