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Having problems with someone at the gym. Watch

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    I'll try and keep this as short as possible. But basically..

    This guy at the gym really, really likes me. It would be a bloody understatement if I said how many time's I told him I'm a lesbian. I've told him literately every time we spoke. We organised to go out together *as friend's to catch a movie*. We fully organised the time's ect tonight, and he thought it was a date, date as I informed him AGAIN *just to be mega clear* that we're just friend's.

    He went postal. Then he started asking for sex, saying that 'cos we're friend's it's okay.I refused. Now he want's me to stay away from the gym. The only thing that's really kept me functioning. I don't know what to do. Especially if he turn's it round on me that I've been harrassing him (and I haven't)

    Would it be worth letting a gym staff member know?
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    Definitely tell someone, he sounds like a total creep. If he's harassing you that badly you could get the police involved.
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    (Original post by CR-19)
    Definitely tell someone, he sounds like a total creep. If he's harassing you that badly you could get the police involved.
    He did touch me in the pool once. Just on the inner thigh. I kept moving away, but he kept moving closer (this was still after I told him I am a lesbian) I told him again after and he never touched me since.
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    Oh dear... He sounds like a real creep!

    I know its silly, but a few girls I know say they're lesbian when a guy they're not interested in hits on them. Maybe he didn't understand that you weren't just brushing him off and that you're ACTUALLY a lesbian? Obviously that's not your fault, you couldn't really have made it clearer. Maybe he also mistook the hanging out as friends as you changing your mind and actually giving him a chance. Still creepy and no excuse.

    And its not acceptable to harass you like that. The touching in the pool smacks of sexual harassment - if you speak to a member of staff they could ask him to leave on those grounds. That's probably a bit extreme, but chances are they'll have a word with him, give him a warning and stuff.

    How long has this been going on?
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    You do realise you could actually go to the police if you are feeling harassed by him.
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    Lifes to short, the sooner you get it sorted the better..let gym staff know =]
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    I agree with CR-19. Tell someone so they're aware of the situation and if he keeps hassling you speak up again.

    If he harrases you again, make a note of it for further proof.

    Also, don't stop going to the gym if it keeps you functioning. You've done nothing wrong and have every right to be there
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    (Original post by samleigh)
    Oh dear... He sounds like a real creep!

    I know its silly, but a few girls I know say they're lesbian when a guy they're not interested in hits on them. Maybe he didn't understand that you weren't just brushing him off and that you're ACTUALLY a lesbian? Obviously that's not your fault, you couldn't really have made it clearer. Maybe he also mistook the hanging out as friends as you changing your mind and actually giving him a chance. Still creepy and no excuse.

    And its not acceptable to harass you like that. The touching in the pool smacks of sexual harassment - if you speak to a member of staff they could ask him to leave on those grounds. That's probably a bit extreme, but chances are they'll have a word with him, give him a warning and stuff.

    How long has this been going on?
    It's been going on since the day I started, I met him on my induction day. So just over two months.
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    (Original post by 3 Phase Duck)
    You do realise you could actually go to the police if you are feeling harassed by him.
    I am feeling very harassed. I wouldn't want to take it to the police. I'd be happy if I could go to the gym, and he could go to the gym and we're just strangers. I'd rather take the adult decision and do it that way. But he want's me to completely stop going.
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    (Original post by myah_94)
    Lifes to short, the sooner you get it sorted the better..let gym staff know =]
    I just don't want the gym to think I'm being a silly little girl over-reacting.
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    (Original post by RetroSpectacles)
    I agree with CR-19. Tell someone so they're aware of the situation and if he keeps hassling you speak up again.

    Also, don't stop going to the gym if it keeps you functioning. You've done nothing wrong and have every right to be there
    Thank you
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    The problem with some guys is that no matter how many times you tell them you are a lesbian, they still think they will be the one to convince you to go straight.

    Ive got so many male friends that think they can turn my lesbian friends straight its beyond a joke.
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    (Original post by EarthsDaughter)
    I just don't want the gym to think I'm being a silly little girl over-reacting.
    I go to the gym myself, if I was in your position that's what I'd do...maybe tell your best member of staff
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    (Original post by EarthsDaughter)
    Thank you
    No problem, it's true And no one would think you're over reacting, he's being inappropriate and it's making you uncomfortable. Speak up the gym needs to know about it
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    (Original post by myah_94)
    I go to the gym myself, if I was in your position that's what I'd do...maybe tell your best member of staff
    Thats the good thing there, because I go everyday, I know all the members of the pool staff and the gym staff, and they know me. So I don't feel uncomfortable talking to them about it.
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    (Original post by EarthsDaughter)
    I just don't want the gym to think I'm being a silly little girl over-reacting.
    I doubt they'd think that, especially not if you mention the pool incident. If you know any of the staff kind of well approach them, or maybe a female staff member who would be able to empathise.

    One of the female staff members at my gym that I'm close-ish too had a client bordering on stalking her and making her job hell and they dealt with it really quickly and efficiently. As far as I know he is not welcome in a few local gyms because of this.

    Because of the general gym environment I think they handle claims of creepy people/harassment fairly well.
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    (Original post by EarthsDaughter)
    I am feeling very harassed. I wouldn't want to take it to the police. I'd be happy if I could go to the gym, and he could go to the gym and we're just strangers. I'd rather take the adult decision and do it that way. But he want's me to completely stop going.
    Well tell the gym staff, but if you feel threatened then go to the police. There is no shame in protecting yourself.
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    (Original post by EarthsDaughter)
    Thats the good thing there, because I go everyday, I know all the members of the pool staff and the gym staff, and they know me. So I don't feel uncomfortable talking to them about it.
    Well they probably won't think you're a silly little girl then, try it
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    Thank you all. I will be reporting it tomorrow. If the creep want's to use the gym at the same time as me, that's fine. I'm adult enough to do what I want to do, and get out.

    But having him suggesting that I don't go gym any more. *****'s be CRAZY.
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    Scissor his bum hole to show him that you're a lezza!
 
 
 
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