This discussion is now closed.

Check out other Related discussions

The stupidity of girls.

Self Imposed pressure dont you think??

The pressure may be imposed largely by other women, but that is not the same as self-imposed. Women are not all the same person.

Would you say that the pressure on men to be sexually active/experienced/dominant is self-imposed, or non-consequential, just because it is largely vocalised by other men?

EDIT: Most people (male and female) are reasonable and do not demand or expect some kind of physical perfection in either gender. Unfortunately, however, this isn't the most vocal message. For girls (and I know less about guys) there is a huge issue of seeing idealised, sexualised images of women in almost every media (although hopefully this is changing), especially mind-numbing glossy magazines with every grossly exaggerated conflicting story about fairly normal women's weight and shape imaginable (is she too fat? is she fatter? she eats only lettuce and cheese! is she thinner? how did she get so thin? she's too thin! she's depressed about her weight! her weight is ruining her life! her husband left he because her boobs are too small! can't get a boyfriend because she's too fat! real men like real women! can't get a boyfriend because she's too thin! she's gone from too fat to too thin! look at that plastic surgery! does she need plastic surgery? she's having a baby! she's fat from having a baby! she isn't having a baby! she's lost her baby weight too fast! she's real! she's fake!) often from a very young age, which is where this whole culture comes from. A culture which is then viciously perpetuated by confused, insecure girls from around 11 years of age (or even younger, I dread to think) onwards. I think the interests imposed on boys from a young age are more about doing, instead of about being or looking a certain way - I don't think there's the same ingrained culture/pressure with them, particularly not from such a young age (whilst obviously some pressure does exist).

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 41

Raiden10

17

Original post by Eveiebaby

Yes agreed. But as I said before - Men have much narrower ideas about what makes a woman attractive compared to women's ideas about men. I think it's a double pressure personally.

I'm not sure that's true, men just aren't as articulate about it. They are also less likely to say things that aren't really the reason they find that person attractive.

For instance, women are more likely to *say* they find someone's personality interesting. That doesn't mean they think it any more than men do. We know women generate gossip by the bucketload.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 42

RollerBall

20

The ironic thing is that the body most girls strive to have is reasonably easy to achieve. Eat well (read: not like a fat ****) and lift. For men it's so much harder, the dedication and consistency it requires for a male to acheive their dream body is much harder than losing weight and doing a bit of sport.

Reply 43

Converse

11

Original post by Steevee

I'm not saying it's all girls :smile:

Just that, you know, it does seem to happen quite a bit. I mean, I think girls are generally just as shallow about other girls as guys are, the obvious exception being a girl's friends, who are always beautiful no matter what xD

I find this hilarious. The way they always say their mates are 'beautiful', 'stunning', and 'perfect babe', when in fact, they just look more 'average' and 'normal'. I bet if most people didn't know their friends and were to judge their appearance honestly, they would be far more critical. Wouldn't expect them to admit it though.

Reply 44

ironandwine

15

A lot is photo-shopped. When women talk of photo-shopping they aren't talking about photos of women lifting weights/showing their progress/etc, they're talking about the glossy pages of magazines and television adverts.

Reply 45

emilie18

14

Original post by Jimbo1234

Both men and women have ideal features, men like women to have good bums, boobs, flat stomach, hips, waist etc, just as women like men to have big shoulders, 6 pack etc - just look at ALL artwork from Ancient Greece to now.

However the only ones who say they don't like this are the ones who are fat and/or ugly and warp reality to justify why they are getting the dregs.

You've highlighted something kind of important there (I think so anyway). You've listed two desired features women have for men, and five for women. And it's true IMO - there are far more boxes to tick for women to be considered to have a "good figure" than there are for men.

Actually, lots of girls like slim or skinny guys.

Original post by Jimbo1234

Actually yes, that's it. You don't have to bulk, just do mild cutting.

That's just not true. Sorry, but "a bit" of exercise and "normal eating" will not give a girl a flat tummy, toned thighs, round bum, etc etc etc. It takes more than "a bit".

It's like if I said - "It's easy for men to get six packs! Just... You know, lift a bit". Obviously not.

Original post by Jimbo1234

Or you idea of "a bit of exercise" varies greatly from mine, and you don't know what a clean diet is.

Haha - I do plenty of exercise. I work out every day, and my diet is a good, balanced, healthy one.

Original post by Jimbo1234

And here is the proof that you have no idea what you are on about. ANY woman can get a good bum. It's a muscle for gods sake, so unless you can't get it to grow, you're just wrong.

1) I wasn't talking just about bums, I was also talking about boobs / bum / waist / etc.
2) Genetics DOES affect how much you can get your bum to grow / round / whatever. Of course you can work out to improve it - I didn't say that was impossible?

Original post by Jimbo1234

It is easier for women. You don't need major defined abs, huge arms, legs, pecs - just a flat stomach. That is easier.

No, we just need a small waist, round bum, slim, smooth thighs, toned arms, flat stomach, etc etc. I have a flat stomach. But my figure isn't the ideal. There are far many other things I would need to have for guys to think I have a nice figure!

Reply 46

Jimbo1234

20

Original post by Pigling

Statements like these are very unfair and extremely rude. Jimbo, I'm sorry to say that you come across as a very aggrieved person. I don't know in what way you've been aggrieved by women, or society - but try to remember that ordinary, pleasant women on this site have done nothing to you but still have to read all of your vitriol, and that's not very pleasant for them.

How is it unfair? Most women are fat, the vast majority don't try with degrees that pay better/give good careers, and many are depressed. Do you expect respect or people to be unimpressed. That's the brutal reality. Just find me statistics that prove otherwise. Yes, I realise that not all are like this, but I, and everyone else I know is yet to meet these "normal, pleasant women" :redface:

Original post by aspirinpharmacist

So basically if a guy doesn't spend loads of time at the gym and trying to become "jacked", no girl is ever going to go out with him, ever? Um, no, not really. I actually do prefer skinny guys as a rule, facial features matter more to be in terms of appearance than a guys figure. Guys exercise a bit to stop themselves getting fat, girls exercise a bit to stop getting fat. Guys exercise like crazy to get their "ideal" figure, girls exercise and diet like crazy to get their "ideal" figure. If I want to look like Jessica Ennis I'd have to start working like her. And both genders will have issues with their body shape, I'm a pear shaped person so I will never be one of super skinny, tiny bum types even if I did exercise like mad. Nor am I ever going to have massive breasts without the use of plastic surgery. Some guys find it relatively easy to get a six pack, others don't. I don't care about six packs though and I wish men would stop assuming we all want ridiculously muscular men.

Wow, you missed the point.
A guy who is jacked will get the best for himself.

Well people judge looks based on themselves, so if you don't want a man in their best shape, it says that you won't be in great shape.
And no, girls don't exercise and diet like crazy. Just go to a gym and see how few girls attend, and then ask a girl the difference between cutting and bulking. They will have no idea what I'm even on about, ergo don't diet correctly. Instead they think a diet is a fad where you only eat cheese :facepalm:

Reply 47

Eveiebaby

12

Original post by Jimbo1234

Or men don't cloud how they feel with vast amounts of emotional problems.

Both men and women have ideal features, men like women to have good bums, boobs, flat stomach, hips, waist etc, just as women like men to have big shoulders, 6 pack etc - just look at ALL artwork from Ancient Greece to now.

However the only ones who say they don't like this are the ones who are fat and/or ugly and warp reality to justify why they are getting the dregs.

https://www.google.co.uk/search?q=armani+model&aq=f&um=1&ie=UTF-8&hl=en&tbm=isch&source=og&sa=N&tab=wi&ei=SIs4UdWZOIeJONnKgJAK&biw=1440&bih=815&sei=S4s4UfbEBsLoOp7WgPgL#imgrc=_

Just no....

If women don't like guys in good shape eg. Brad Pitt, then there is a reason eg because they're fat and know they can't get a guy like that. But, that does not mean they are not attractive.

Armani aren't considered on the pulse of fashion anymore, as are a lot of Italian designers who had their heydays in the 90s. Come on Jimbo. Try harder. That aesthetic is OLD

http://www.google.co.uk/search?hl=en&site=imghp&tbm=isch&source=hp&biw=1350&bih=875&q=most+successful+male+fashion+models&oq=most+successful+male+fashion+models&gs_l=img.12...1058.1058.0.2233.1.1.0.0.0.0.81.81.1.1.0...0.0...1ac.1.5.img.eyQBlqyw-mc

Slim and still BEAUTIFUL. Having one idea about male physicality is narrowminded. Just because I dont conform to your belief doesnt make me fat and ugly. I don't prioritise looks over personality anyway. If you have read any of my posts (which i can patently see you haven't), you'd have read that I'm dating someone who's athletic and broad despite my preferences for a more boyish look. Because he's kind and gentlemanly. And I think that emotions are not a bad thing. Men just arent socially encouraged to be emotional.

Brad Pitt is 50+ and wrinkly as hell. I prefer younger men. It's just my thing.

Ancient greece artworks/statues.....who do you think created them? Men. Men idolise that aesthetic more than women. men idolise aesthetics more than women. But keep on telling us what we have to find attractive. It's becoming quite authoritarian and dictatorial what you're saying. Insulting people doesnt not strengthen your argument either. You just sound very angry, rude and self important.

I personally am not bothered about men having a massive 6 pack and big shoulders. Nor do I look for "protective" looking men. Basically because I am almost 6 ft myself and think it's idiotic. I can defend myself and probably hold my own against men of my height and stature. But I'm not going to reject everyone who doesnt reach my ideals. TBH I've never been out with hot, androgynous guys despite me preferring them. I'm probably the sort of woman that intimidates that kind of guy.

Just for the info - this might make your head spin. I am a sports physiology and nutrition graduate. I know in great depth and respect the hard work that goes into making a body lean and/or hard. However my respect is separate from my attraction and I'm attracted to people who look very different or exotic to me. That equals skinny, pretty white boys in my case...

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 48

abc:)

22

Original post by Cheech23

Reading a few threads on here related to what boys prefer, and there was a few pictures of girls who looked insanely good looking, tight curvacous bums and quite frankly are really attractive.

What I cant quite seem to gather is the fact that as soon as there are pictures of girls like this it is automatically - PHOTOSHOPPED!!! REAL GIRLS ARENT LIKE THAT.

So real girls arent attractive?

It is easily achieveable to get bodies like that, goin a gym work hard and with some determination it WILL happen. Over time of course, but it WILL happen. Not everything is photoshopped.

Thats quite disrespectful to all the girls that have put in the work to achieve those types of body shapes. Now im not saying that photoshopping doesnt exist as it does, but dont assume that everything is photoshopped.

When you say real girls - is that slightly overweight, and droopy ass bum cheeks as im sorry girls that isnt attractive.

Its the same for muscular guys and skinny guys, youd choose the muscular guy over the skinny guy every time so dont get annoyed when guys are going gaga over girls with attractive bums and boobs.

Hate the term "real" as a substitute for less attractive almost as if the other girls are fake just because they've put in the hard work.

Im sorry but the "real" girl to me is someone who has chosen to better themselves and doesnt moan or complain or put other girls down based on their appearance, (im not saying i wont go out with someone who hasnt but id prefer someone who actually takes care of themselves) they may be better looking but they arent dis-respectful to girls who havent done the hard work. It almost comes across as very bitter/jealous when other girls say that they arent real. Believe me if you had a chance to wake up the next day with the same body you will NOT refuse.

they put a lot of emphasis and importance on what a girl (or guy) looks like, and you're doing the same, that's the real issue.

Reply 49

Serentonin

16

I'd say something but jimbo seems to have said it so much better.

As a girl, if you eat clean (and i actually mean CLEAN, not the crap people seem to think a healthy diet consists of these days), lift a little, run a little, and you're sorted. Guys have to eat clean and lift a ****load more.

Reply 50

MancBoy

12

Girl logic -

'Big is beautiful', 'Curvy is better than being a twig' etc.

...only goes for hot guys :rolleyes:

Reply 51

Pigling

8

Original post by Jimbo1234

How is it unfair? Most women are fat, the vast majority don't try with degrees that pay better/give good careers, and many are depressed.

The majority of men over 16 are overweight or obese in the UK. Obesity is an endemic health problem across society. This is a concern because of morbidity and mortality - in which both categories men are statistically worse off than women.

"The vast majority of women don't try with degrees that give good careers?" - what is that Jimbo? Just your opinion? According to you, this is grounds for the "modern woman" beng lazy despite the fact that women's entry in tertiary education is higher than it has ever been and continues to grow? If you think women are not as successful careers-wise as men, might you try to think of some reasons which aren't as plain dumb as "because modern women are lazy" - particularly as again, the presence of women in high paid/successful careers is higher than ever and rising.

Additionally, depression as a mental health issue isn't something that should be used to criticise or stigmatise. It is a sad reflection of your ignorance that you would think it is. Women are more likely to be diagnosed with depression, men are more likely to commit suicide without a diagnosis of depression - perhaps this is a reflection of gendered stigma and societal expectations which suggest that depression is a women's problem. Why don't you think on it before you make casual, but potentially harmful statements.

Original post by Jimbo1234

Do you expect respect or people to be unimpressed. That's the brutal reality. Just find me statistics that prove otherwise. Yes, I realise that not all are like this, but I, and everyone else I know is yet to meet these "normal, pleasant women" :redface:

1) Yes I expect respect. I'm not surprised that there are people like you quite happy to generalise and insult perfect strangers on the grounds of their gender, but I'm happy to rule you into a rather strange and unfortunate minority which I must do my best to tolerate.

2) If you are aware that "not all are like this" then perhaps you shouldn't give statements such as "the modern woman is" or "women are", or the "vast majority of women are" when you know them to be false generalisations.

3) If you struggle to have normal, pleasant interactions with women - might I suggest that some aspect of your attitude, perception* or presentation is the problem?

*Eg: only earlier today I saw you comment on a thread at how pleasant and ideal a girl was, yet you already appear to have forgotten this in order to fuel your "there are no/hardly any nice women" campaign. I imagine the greatest torment resulting from this victim complex is your own. It's distressing to see someone who is so wrapped up in negativity. I hope one day that you meet a normal, pleasant girl of your own, can see it, and realise how wrong you are.

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 52

hannahchan

13

Original post by Cheech23

Reading a few threads on here related to what boys prefer, and there was a few pictures of girls who looked insanely good looking, tight curvacous bums and quite frankly are really attractive.

What I cant quite seem to gather is the fact that as soon as there are pictures of girls like this it is automatically - PHOTOSHOPPED!!! REAL GIRLS ARENT LIKE THAT.

So real girls arent attractive?

It is easily achieveable to get bodies like that, goin a gym work hard and with some determination it WILL happen. Over time of course, but it WILL happen. Not everything is photoshopped.

Thats quite disrespectful to all the girls that have put in the work to achieve those types of body shapes. Now im not saying that photoshopping doesnt exist as it does, but dont assume that everything is photoshopped.

When you say real girls - is that slightly overweight, and droopy ass bum cheeks as im sorry girls that isnt attractive.

Its the same for muscular guys and skinny guys, youd choose the muscular guy over the skinny guy every time so dont get annoyed when guys are going gaga over girls with attractive bums and boobs.

Hate the term "real" as a substitute for less attractive almost as if the other girls are fake just because they've put in the hard work.

Im sorry but the "real" girl to me is someone who has chosen to better themselves and doesnt moan or complain or put other girls down based on their appearance, (im not saying i wont go out with someone who hasnt but id prefer someone who actually takes care of themselves) they may be better looking but they arent dis-respectful to girls who havent done the hard work. It almost comes across as very bitter/jealous when other girls say that they arent real. Believe me if you had a chance to wake up the next day with the same body you will NOT refuse.

Are you suggesting those that dont go to the gym aren't worthy or don't look after themselves?

Reply 53

username728604

2

Original post by emilie18

Also - genetics have a much larger part to play in the female figure than it does the male. Boobs / bum / waist / etc - a large part of it is due to genetics and if you haven't got it, then no amount of working out is going to get you there 100%.

Precisely. The female ideal is largely genetically predetermined. The difference is with men is that the ideal is for the most part achievable for all men if they really want it. Whereas as women cannot gain wider/narrower hips, smaller waists or bigger bums and boobs through natural means in the majority of cases. If anything exercising to such a degree that men do will cause many women to loose much desired assets which is often an off-putting factor for some women.

Also, women's bodies are photoshopped much more than men's to portray this often unachievable look so to an extent, it's probably true that a studio shot of a woman has been edited to enhance or decrease her proportions. It's not just jealousy.

Admittedly the pressure put on women is often self-imposed - men aren't as fussy as many women think - but the pressure on men and women is not really comparable. Compare male sex symbols to female ones...many of the men will have far from 'ideal' bodies in terms of muscularity whereas you'd be hard pushed to find a women with an average body in the top 10. Magazines often lie about the weight and measurements of female celebrities which adds further to insecurities.

Reply 54

Friar Chris

19

Original post by Cheech23

Reading a few threads on here related to what boys prefer, and there was a few pictures of girls who looked insanely good looking, tight curvacous bums and quite frankly are really attractive.

What I cant quite seem to gather is the fact that as soon as there are pictures of girls like this it is automatically - PHOTOSHOPPED!!! REAL GIRLS ARENT LIKE THAT.

So real girls arent attractive?

It is easily achieveable to get bodies like that, goin a gym work hard and with some determination it WILL happen. Over time of course, but it WILL happen. Not everything is photoshopped.

Thats quite disrespectful to all the girls that have put in the work to achieve those types of body shapes. Now im not saying that photoshopping doesnt exist as it does, but dont assume that everything is photoshopped.

When you say real girls - is that slightly overweight, and droopy ass bum cheeks as im sorry girls that isnt attractive.

Its the same for muscular guys and skinny guys, youd choose the muscular guy over the skinny guy every time so dont get annoyed when guys are going gaga over girls with attractive bums and boobs.

Hate the term "real" as a substitute for less attractive almost as if the other girls are fake just because they've put in the hard work.

Im sorry but the "real" girl to me is someone who has chosen to better themselves and doesnt moan or complain or put other girls down based on their appearance, (im not saying i wont go out with someone who hasnt but id prefer someone who actually takes care of themselves) they may be better looking but they arent dis-respectful to girls who havent done the hard work. It almost comes across as very bitter/jealous when other girls say that they arent real. Believe me if you had a chance to wake up the next day with the same body you will NOT refuse.

I didn't believe it to be possible, to have so much wrong packed into but one post.

And yet, here it is.

Reply 55

.Red

16

Looks like the girls in this thread just don't get it, It is by far much, much easier to attain a good female physique than a shredded muscular male physique

(edited 11 years ago)

Reply 56

emilie18

14

Original post by Nomes89

Precisely. The female ideal is largely genetically predetermined. The difference is with men is that the ideal is for the most part achievable for all men if they really want it. Whereas as women cannot gain wider/narrower hips, smaller waists or bigger bums and boobs through natural means in the majority of cases. If anything exercising to such a degree that men do will cause many women to loose much desired assets which is often an off-putting factor for some women.

Also, women's bodies are photoshopped much more than men's to portray this often unachievable look so to an extent, it's probably true that a studio shot of a woman has been edited to enhance or decrease her proportions. It's not just jealousy.

Admittedly the pressure put on women is often self-imposed - men aren't as fussy as many women think - but the pressure on men and women is not really comparable. Compare male sex symbols to female ones...many of the men will have far from 'ideal' bodies in terms of muscularity whereas you'd be hard pushed to find a women with an average body in the top 10. Magazines often lie about the weight and measurements of female celebrities which adds further to insecurities.

THANKYOU!

I'm glad at least someone on here sees my point.

Reply 57

Cheech23

OP

6

Original post by hannahchan

Are you suggesting those that dont go to the gym aren't worthy or don't look after themselves?

far from it.

Reply 58

desdemonata

19

It's amazing how many guys love to ignore genetics and say women only need to "lift a bit" and "eat well". Come on. For example the "ideal" hourglass figure, narrow waist and wide hips, is not achievable for most women. That is bone structure, not muscle, or body fat, or tone, or anything else. Other things like thigh gaps aren't achievable for some women without being dangerously underweight, and again with boobs without resorting to surgery, genetics stick you with what you've got. You can be the healthiest woman, working out everyday, and easily still not have the ideal body you "only" have to get.

Reply 59

redpanda41

4

Original post by Jimbo1234

How is it unfair? Most women are fat, the vast majority don't try with degrees that pay better/give good careers, and many are depressed. Do you expect respect or people to be unimpressed. That's the brutal reality. Just find me statistics that prove otherwise. Yes, I realise that not all are like this, but I, and everyone else I know is yet to meet these "normal, pleasant women" :redface:

You've never met a 'normal, pleasant' woman? May I suggest the problem may be with you and not with half of the UK's entire population. You are clearly suffering from an extreme case of confirmation bias. I would also argue that society would only benefit if people studied subjects they were truly passionate about instead of subjects chosen purely to enhance their own money making potential. Learning for the sake of learning is something that should be applauded, not belittled!

EDIT: Just to add, if you've never met a 'normal' woman, does this not suggest that what you understand the word 'normal' to mean, simply by definition, has to be wrong?

(edited 11 years ago)

The stupidity of girls.

Related discussions

Latest

Trending

Trending

Articles for you