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What percentage of adults are unsuccessful in pursuing relationships or sex? Watch

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    #1

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Its exactly the same at postgrad level if not worse!
    Someone pointed out earlier I think in percentages and that's correct. I used to wonder about my chances in the future and how they change with me going through university and becoming a proper adult. I'm currently surrounded by like minded people of the same age at university, this is the best shot I have in life at finding someone I would guess. I can only presume that I once I begin work it will be much harder, maybe there will be no young people in my office for example. There is also the problem of inexperience which becomes much more of a burden as one grows older and older.

    I'm not trying to sound overly pessimistic but it seems your experience at postgrad seems to suggest a downward turn in the availability of a suitable partner.
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    [QUOTE=Anonymous;41847990]Someone pointed out earlier I think in percentages and that's correct. I used to wonder about my chances in the future and how they change with me going through university and becoming a proper adult. I'm currently surrounded by like minded people of the same age at university, this is the best shot I have in life at finding someone I would guess. I can only presume that I once I begin work it will be much harder, maybe there will be no young people in my office for example. There is also the problem of inexperience which becomes much more of a burden as one grows older and older.

    I'm not trying to sound overly pessimistic but it seems your experience at postgrad seems to suggest a downward turn in the availability of a suitable partner.[/QUOTE]


    Its not so much that there is a downturn in availability, more the fact that I have no time to seek it out. I changed universities from undergrad to postgrad so I don't have a large friend base like I did before- I only really know people on my course and tbh, I am only really friends with a few of them despite the numbers on the entire course relatively small. I don't have time to socialise much or really get to know people that well.

    I'm sure there are plently of people out there who would be great- but I have no time to go and find/talk to them etc.
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    Take reassurance, TSR seems filled with early twenty something angst about lack of getting leg over / under. More seriously I really believe there is someone for everyone. It is all about giving it your best and persistence. Dating is only easy for a few...
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    (Original post by milkytea)
    I don't know if this translates to your own circumstances, but I think my problem was partly that I didn't really dedicate any specific time or effort into really developing my relationships with any girls. Relationships are different to friendships, and while it's easy to form a friendship naturally, you have to really concentrate effort into forming a relationship. I think technique just comes with experience, but the point is that you really have to take the responsibility upon yourself to make things happen and make your interests clear, because otherwise it's very difficult to make things happen. In general, I think it's best to talk about your intentions openly with people. If there's somebody you like, then try to make it clear to them.
    Interesting point. I see plenty of girls I find attractive but never go further than normal conversation. I think I lack a spark with anyone who could be a possible potential partner. If I was given that spark I would probably pounce upon it without a moments hesitation, which would be seen as desperate and clingy lol.


    Yeah that is essentially how I feel.

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Its not so much that there is a downturn in availability, more the fact that I have no time to seek it out. I changed universities from undergrad to postgrad so I don't have a large friend base like I did before- I only really know people on my course and tbh, I am only really friends with a few of them despite the numbers on the entire course relatively small. I don't have time to socialise much or really get to know people that well.

    I'm sure there are plently of people out there who would be great- but I have no time to go and find/talk to them etc.
    I plan to also change universities to pursue a masters degree. I plan to mainly concentrate on work seeing as I don't expect to really form meaningful friendships in a year, but hopefully I could. As for romantic relationships, well..... seems unlikely if even normal friends are hard to come by!


    (Original post by Zarek)
    Take reassurance, TSR seems filled with early twenty something angst about lack of getting leg over / under. More seriously I really believe there is someone for everyone. It is all about giving it your best and persistence. Dating is only easy for a few...
    Not to disrespect those others who post but I can usually sense something is wrong with them. For example I have read plenty of posts in which people assume they are better looking than average, this suggests arrogance which is unattractive. Likewise they will play video games all day indoors, never go outside and wonder why the girl of their dreams never notices them. Unfortunately I believe 'someone for everyone' is a lie spun by those in a better position to comfort their unsuccessful friends. Life isn't a fairytale.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Not to disrespect those others who post but I can usually sense something is wrong with them. For example I have read plenty of posts in which people assume they are better looking than average, this suggests arrogance which is unattractive. Likewise they will play video games all day indoors, never go outside and wonder why the girl of their dreams never notices them. Unfortunately I believe 'someone for everyone' is a lie spun by those in a better position to comfort their unsuccessful friends. Life isn't a fairytale.
    Being overly pessimistic and bitter about these things is also unattractive.

    Life isn't a fairytale, but nor is it a bloody philosophy dissertation.
 
 
 
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