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    (Original post by callum9999)
    It's hardly unusual for friends to share things between them - and no, that doesn't mean keeping mental records to the exact value of what you take to ensure they take the exact value back.

    Many people operate friendships this way (with the general idea that over several years, it roughly evens out) so I don't know why people find it such a shocking concept!
    Agreed...although it is a houseshare with randoms, but I see them as friends and treat them in a relaxed manner I would with friends or family.
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    Why would they....maybe because some people just don't mind sharing. Not everyone has a me against the world attitude. The money raised for comic relief proves that.

    If someone got upset about because someone had a piece of their bread I would just explain logically how cheap that piece of bread is and how illogical they're being and all arguments they have would be pointless.......all they could say is 'it is the principle of the matter'...which basically means you're a sheep.
    It's not the same as comic relief-comic relief don't take money from people-they ask, and people give.
    If someone says 'here I've got a loaf of bread, have some if you want' then fine. If they don't , then you should ask.It's theirs-it's not yours.
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    (Original post by serendipidista)
    My idea of a good flatemate-ship is that you have a shopping list with some basics, everybody can add their extras and luxury things, there is a household money box, and once a week one goes shopping - taking turns obviously.
    Just saying. Am I too optimistic? It has worked before.

    I really just hate the fact that people seem to live in flats only to save money. For me, it should be a bit like a family. Even if their not your besties you shouldn't bich about paying a pound more. Eventually, it will be balance out. And if not, you are all adults, after all, and you should be able to talk about issues.

    I can only hope that there are still some people out there who don't assume that sharing is the same as stealing!!!

    Sharing is caring, in my opinion!
    I love you! You're a nice person!
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    If someone needed to use your belongings and you wasn't there...why wouldn't you want them to use them?...are you an only child?

    Personally for me I like helping others....I have a fair amount of equipment in my room and leave my door open all the time so others can use it if they're off work.
    It's not like I don't like helping people. I've devoted a lot of my time and efforts in helping people and never do I expect anything in return, but there are some things you have to do for yourself?

    Why in the world would anybody need to use my belongings? The only thing I can think of that they would need to use would possibly be kitchen utensils in which case mine would probably be in the kitchen. If they really wanted to use it, I wouldn't mind SO LONG AS THEY WASH IT UP AFTERWARDS. But if they use it and don't wash it up afterwards that would annoy me. Other than that I can't imagine what else I would have that they shouldn't have? And anyway we're talking about food sharing with housemates aren't we? Let's not digress.

    And no, I'm not an only child but the way I treat some random housemates would be different to how I'd treat friends, which would also be different to how I treat family. You make it sound like I don't share or whatnot, I never said I don't offer my things to people when they need it, nor did I say I refuse when people ask to use my belongings. As I said, my problem is people USING my things or TAKING my things without even so much as asking... Because... it is rude?! Do people not know what common courtesy is anymore? Really?! ._. Dude you need to open your eyes. You probably think I'm a mean person who doesn't share anything or whatever just because I don't like it when people take my things without asking.
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    No, I don't eat my housemates' food, because I'm not an inconsiderate dickbag.
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    Once I've got to know my flat mates I wouldn't have a problem with sharing any of my things but to start with you are all strangers.
    I personally wouldn't leave my door unlocked when I'm not home for security reasons, you never know if you are going to get broken into? I wouldn't keep my room locked if I was inside my flat and I'd be more than happy for my flat mates to walk in and out of my room if I'm there. But why would they feel it necessary to enter my room when I'm not there??

    Sharing is absolutely fine as long as everyone feels the same about it. You will always get that one person who will take take take and deem it acceptable and never give anything in return!!


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    In New Zealand and Australian (and I think in South African) flats its completely normal to share food. Often the flat as a group will go grocery shopping or just give one person the money (and list) to go shopping. Food bought with one's own money and labelled or kept in one's room is, of course, out of bounds but otherwise everything is fair game. Most flatmates will eat the evening meal together (when they're not going out).

    If your flat has a policy of each person buying their own food than that's rude to eat it, imo. Just like you wouldn't take your flatmates money or wear their clothes.

    If it bothers your housemates try finding international students who have a more relaxed food policy! Or just a different group of housemates, but it seems like buying your own food is a common theme in most British apartments/shared houses?
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    I do quite regular! Luckily I get on with them well and they laugh it off. I wouldn't eat a main piece like expensive meat...but definitely bread, milk, fruit, salad if I fancy it. Would this bother you? If so why?

    I think I am going to get a housemate eventually that will hate me doing it...should be interesting.

    btw I am pretty easy going with my food as well.

    Well i don't. I think it shows very little respect on your behalf. I like what you said, that you are "pretty easy going with your food". Well it would be bloody unfair if you weren't !!!!
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    I would not be happy if someone was constantly eating my food. I am careful with my food so I make sure I have enough of what I need and don't usually have anything/much to spare in a week so someone else eating my food would leave me without. Saying that, I don't mind someone using the odd bit of milk/butter/spices as long as there's the agreement that it's not on a regular basis and I can do the same back if necessary. Usually works fine.

    One of my housemates eats the 'nice' food in the house, like crisps, chocolate etc. so we don't leave it around in the kitchen for him to have anymore. Simple but annoying.
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    I love you! You're a nice person!
    Haha

    The problem we have here is how people view their property.
    In fact, it's not about the price of the bread, but the feeling that they possess it.
    So I'm strongly advocating a more liberal view on "possessions" in shared flats. Just think how much money and trouble you can spare if you have only one box of flour/sugar/seasonings/... These things hardly cost anything and will be used for quite some weeks or months.
    Same with cookery. You don't cook at the same time anyway, so why in heaven would you need 6 sauce pans?
    And if you do - stop it and cook together in one pan.


    Just be a bit relaxed about your possessions. It's nothing but an illusion that makes us more anonymous and less social.
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    I do quite regular! Luckily I get on with them well and they laugh it off. I wouldn't eat a main piece like expensive meat...but definitely bread, milk, fruit, salad if I fancy it. Would this bother you? If so why?

    I think I am going to get a housemate eventually that will hate me doing it...should be interesting.

    btw I am pretty easy going with my food as well.
    Nah, we all decided from day one that utensils, cooking equipment and crockery we would shared. Food on the other hand, is our own. However, if my housemate knocked on my door or facebook messaged me asking if he/she could borrow a tin of chopped tomatoes or a few slices of bread I would say yes immediately because it's respectful to ask. If they just took it, I would give them a *******ing and probably peel off all of the labels on their tins as revenge
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    It depends on who you live with I think. If you're good friends with the people you live with then a little bit of food stealing back and forth is alright, maybe treating them to a meal now and then if you've stolen something particularly expensive or that they particularly wanted that night is a nice move. However, with my flatmates, I wouldn't leave my door unlocked ever, and some of my food has been stolen - almost a whole bottle of ketchup one time, and then when I really wanted ketchup and didn't have any, no-one would let me use some of theirs so no-one owned up to it if people are in dire straits then I'd share food gladly or give them money to get their own, but sometimes it takes the proverbial.
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    Agreed...although it is a houseshare with randoms, but I see them as friends and treat them in a relaxed manner I would with friends or family.
    See, I think you both agree that there is a sort of boundary where it is acceptable to take someone's food in some quantities. It's like there are two types of 'taking food' - there's the type where you're friends, you've run out of milk and you're making a cup of tea, so you grab a little of theirs but they'd be welcome to do the same if they were in the same situation.

    And then there's the unacceptable type of taking food. Imagine if one of your flatmates moved out and was replaced. The first thing you see the new guy do is open up the fridge, make himself a slice of toast and butter with your supplies, brew a cup of tea and use the last of your milk - that would be considered outrageous by almost anyone, as it's basically a complete stranger wandering into your home and committing theft.

    The boundary between what is acceptable and what isn't varies from person to person. Your personal boundary is just in a more relaxed position.

    I think the reason why many people believe you should ask, or mention what you have borrowed/taken afterwards, is mainly a courtesy in order to recognise the difference between the two types of 'taking food' - "I have borrowed some of your milk, this doesn't mean you're going to come home some day and find I've nicked your dinner or that you're going to have to start buying enough milk and bread for two people instead of just yourself for the next 3 years", instead of "I have removed and effectively destroyed some of your property. You will not see it again. F*ck you."

    Can you see now why some people would consider it quite rude? Also bear in mind, you may think of your flatmates as new siblings or mates, but they DO NOT NECESSARILY think of you in the same way.
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    I didn't think this went on anymore, Back in my dad's day (he's 48 now) people used to steal food out of his fridge, it got to the point where he lamped one of them out of frustration after a £50 lamb fillet got stolen LMAO.

    If anyone stole my food without asking, they would definitely be getting a roundhouse kick across the face.

    I'm a ****ing bodybuilder so if anyone stole any of my chicken whilst I was on a bulk god damn there would be roid rage in the house.
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    Funny, I had a friend who's housemate was constantly stealing his milk. So one day he put in a lot of laxatives. Needless to say, the guy got quite sick and moved out.

    I'd only eat my housemates food if it was out of date and he'll be away for a good while.
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    (Original post by McHumpy92)
    I do quite regular! Luckily I get on with them well and they laugh it off. I wouldn't eat a main piece like expensive meat...but definitely bread, milk, fruit, salad if I fancy it. Would this bother you? If so why?

    I think I am going to get a housemate eventually that will hate me doing it...should be interesting.

    btw I am pretty easy going with my food as well.
    why not buy your own food, i'd be annoyed if anyone ate my food
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    (Original post by serendipidista)
    Haha

    The problem we have here is how people view their property.
    In fact, it's not about the price of the bread, but the feeling that they possess it.
    So I'm strongly advocating a more liberal view on "possessions" in shared flats. Just think how much money and trouble you can spare if you have only one box of flour/sugar/seasonings/... These things hardly cost anything and will be used for quite some weeks or months.
    Same with cookery. You don't cook at the same time anyway, so why in heaven would you need 6 sauce pans?
    And if you do - stop it and cook together in one pan.


    Just be a bit relaxed about your possessions. It's nothing but an illusion that makes us more anonymous and less social.
    Totally agree...some of my housemates still keep pans in their drawer. I still use them if I cannot be arsed with washing up.

    The best part is they're pretty crap when it comes to recycling...I am always picking their crap out of the bin to recycle it. They're not considerate at all they're just socially conditioned.
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    Every now and again I steal some milk when making tea or coffee if I don't have any, but that's it.
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    Getting the feeling that this guy is just neg fishing /bore
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    I don't take any food, unless obviously they ask people to eat it to use it up. Wouldn't particularly bother me if they took my food but we tend to buy our own food and stick to it. Maybe borrow something every now and then but replace it later on.
 
 
 
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