Join TSR now for chat about life, relationships, fashion and more…Sign up now

Not sure how to feel better about this.. Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I have been with my girlfriend for about 3 months now... she says she is good friends with a guy who she's known a long time, and they speak by facebook/text and go to each others' houses sometimes.
    This is no problem for me, but the thing is I discovered that she liked him for three years before she got with me. They never went out and nothing ever happened, they were just friends, but she felt something for him for three years.. which seems like an eternity to me, even if she wasn't always doing anything about it.
    Since I have never liked someone I didn't go out with for more than a few months, it makes me think he must be really special. She says she loves me a lot, but I feel like it might be nothing compared to what she felt for him.
    The thing is, I knew her for a month or so before we were in a relationship, and she said she really liked me but she talked about a guy she had liked ( I didn't know it was him at the time) and I remember her seeming annoyed and upset because he had started to go out with someone who she didn't think was very nice.. and she was talking about him in a kind of bitter way..so to me it sounded like she was still attracted.
    I am just wondering if it's possible to get over someone after 3 years so quickly? She said she doesn't like him like that any more, but she is also a friendly person and I feel like I am analyzing the way she speaks to him, to see if it's flirty or something?
    The other thing is that, apparently he liked her too recently, but since he was with someone/she was with me...
    I trust her not to cheat. I just don't want to see this guy and it's awkward or something, and I wish I could stop feeling paranoid. I can't tell them not to be good friends, but I wish I could stop feeling inadequate. Does anyone have any advice? Thanks.
    Offline

    2
    ReputationRep:
    I feel for you. The only answers that you are going to get on this issue will be from your girlfriend.

    Talk to her about this. Don't throw accusations around, but word your concerns and feelings.
    If you don't, then you might end up driving her away yourself - negative feelings show.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    (Original post by Pedd)
    I feel for you. The only answers that you are going to get on this issue will be from your girlfriend.

    Talk to her about this. Don't throw accusations around, but word your concerns and feelings.
    If you don't, then you might end up driving her away yourself - negative feelings show.
    Thanks, yeah she has said that the guy is really only a friend, and it's not like she sees him every day or something, though they've applied for a job at the same place so soon they might do. He's a really good-looking and popular guy and everyone always says so. She seems to be really in love with me, so maybe I helped her to get over him, and that was what she needed, I dunno. But she told me this guy doesn't like her now, so I think I'll just try to calm down about it.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    bump
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 22, 2013
Poll
Which pet is the best?

The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

Quick reply
Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.