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    #1

    just found out recently that my boyfriend has watched porn. He said it was ages ago, but i found out by myself that its been recently and often. i know most guys watch porn, and i shouldnt feel insecure but i do , because recently he doesnt even bother trying to see me and we rarely have sex, so i feel as if im not good enough. what to do?
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    Almost every single guy watches porn. Its something they enjoy.
    Its pretty hard to find a guy who doesn't so its something girls have to get used to.

    I know my bf doesnt find most girls in porn massively attractive and it never makes me insecure to find out guys im seeing/in a relationship watch it. I watch porn. Who am I to say what he can do in his spare time. It doesnt hurting any one or damaging our relationship in any way, in my view.

    Why does it bother you? He's with you, he wants to be with you. He only watches it to get off. He doesnt want to be in a relationship with those porn stars.
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    If it's not gay porn, don't be worried.
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    havent met a guy that doesn't watch it. Most girls do too
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    My boyfriend also does this but I do too!Whats the big deal.We still love each other and enjoy a regular sex life.I think the fact your not having sex is the real problem,don't force it though just be yourself and dress sexy sometimes.If your really worried and you have tried everything,I'm sure he wouldn't mind you asking him what he's attracted to.Don't be intimidated by porn ok! xx
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    Watch it with him and try some of the things you see.
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    So he is ****ing because he is not getting sex for some reason. The problem here isn't porn, it is your sex life with him.
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    The thing you need to remember is that there's a difference between a relationship, and sex within that relationship, and pornography. Sex is something you have with somebody you care about, and is about two people. Masturbation is generally far more brief, and has basically no relationship to the subject matter. Most guys will have masturbated to really bizarre things, like Carol on Countdown etc.

    You shouldn't think that porn is in any way competing for affection. It's just a thing.
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    How about you suck him off
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    I'm not sure that there is a problem here
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    If you're not having much of a sex life then you really need to discuss it with him and find out why he isn't bothering with you. I have no problem with my partner watching porn every now and then if I'm not with him (LDR), as I do the same. But if I were there with him and he chose porn over me or vice versa we'd both be extremely upset.

    I have a friend who was dating this guy who was addicted to porn and he would constantly choose it over her. Her dad was in hospital and extremely ill, yet he claimed he couldn't come because he had a lot of uni work...she came home and found him watching porn. That's unacceptable IMO.
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    The best thing you could do is watch the porn n learn from what he's into.. don't over do it tho..
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    (Original post by freya1994)
    havent met a guy that doesn't watch it. Most girls do too
    I don't, although I'm neither male nor female.
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    What type of porn - midgets, clowns, cosmonauts...what are we dealing with here?







    Don't worry about it, most guys do it.
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    You should leave him, this isn't acceptable.
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    Watch it with him then!
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    It seems like there's more than one issue here....

    How did you find out for yourself? Were you going through his Internet history? If so- why? Do you not trust him?

    He lied to you about watching porn and how often he does. What upsets you more, the fact he watches porn or the fact he lies about watching it?

    You should never be in a relationship and not feeling good enough or insecure! He probably has no idea you're feeling that way if you haven't told him.

    In my opinion it sounds like you two need to communicate more. There is nothing wrong with sitting down with him, explaining how you feel about porn, how often you see each other and how often you have sex. Perhaps he hasn't been seeing you much recently because he's got something on his mind or he's struggling with something at work/school/uni, therefore taking time to talk might help you both. Avoid turning it into an argument by not raising voices or bringing up previous arguments and make sure by the end of the conversation you have some kind of resolution.

    From personal experience I can empathise with you, I hated my boyfriend watching porn. It made me feel insecure and worried that he was going to compare me to porn stars. I told him how I felt and as a result we came to a resolution where he stopped watching porn and I took naughty pictures of myself for him to look at instead.

    Hope that helps.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    just found out recently that my boyfriend has watched porn. He said it was ages ago, but i found out by myself that its been recently and often. i know most guys watch porn, and i shouldnt feel insecure but i do , because recently he doesnt even bother trying to see me and we rarely have sex, so i feel as if im not good enough. what to do?
    Like you said yourself most guys watch porn so I don't think that is the issue - it is your partner's personality. I know guys who watch porn and have perfectly healthy and loving relationships.
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    You might be confusing causation here, i.e. the lack of sex may have drawn him to porn instead of vice versa.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Its not just the porn that bothers me, up until a few months back he never watched porn whilst weve been going out (2yrs now) he never tries to contact or meet up with me,. Doesn't try having sex with me, so just thinking going off me
 
 
 
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