The Student Room Group

Do guys go for plain looking girls because they are scared to go for the pretty ones?

I've noticed that nearly every plain looking girl has a boyfriend. It seems like the very attractive girls are the ones who are more likely to be single. Guys always talk about the really pretty girls, but end up going for the plain ones. One of my male friends admitted to me that he wouldn't ask out a really pretty girl because he is intimidated by them, and that he tells himself that plain girls are more down to earth, even though deep down he knows that's not necessarily true. Guys, is this how you feel? Are you scared to go for pretty girls? Also, would you be more likely to ask out a pretty girl who was an aquaintance rather than a random girl in a bar?

I know people are going to say 'everyone has a different idea of what pretty is..' but we all know some girls are considered plain by the majority and some girls are considered pretty by the majority.

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I think some males are guilty of this; at the same time I think the girl they deem ''plain'' will become more attractive to them as time goes on due to personality etc. Also, a guy can like a pretty girl but may be able to see that they won't be compatible in the long run?

I'm interested to see the responses, though!
Reply 2
It really depends on a guy's confidence level. I'll admit I used to do this when I was around 15/16, but as I got older I gained more confidence and slowly felt like I kinda had a better chance with the hotter girls. The other thing at my school was that since so many guys tried going for the girls they perceived to be "plain" in their eyes, what actually happened was that they left a lot of very pretty ones single, and very much available.

Hope this helps!
(edited 11 years ago)
Guess they don't feel good when their partner has more 'beauty' than them; intimidated= out of their league
Yes, I have sort of subconsciously trained myself to become more attracted to 'plainer' girls. There's not much use being attracted to girls who you feel are 'better' than you as you're unlikely to ever get anywhere with them and if you actually do, you probably won't feel worthy of being their boyfriend. Also, girls who know they are of 'high value' tend to be overly confident and harder to manage, which ironically is actually an unattractive quality.

So, I guess I am naturally more attracted to the more plainer girls who also fit the general appearance attributes I prefer as ultimately they would make the perfect girlfriend for me.
Reply 5
Yh a lot of the time plainer girls are seen as 'easier', so have more guys going after them.
Reply 6
I think this scenario is quite common. Average looking men will go for average looking women then make up bizarre reasons as to why they prefer them to stunningly beautiful women :rolleyes:
(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 7
I think pretty girls get more attention and that a common strategy is to get to know them, try to impress, and weigh up your chances if you make a move. I don't see so many very attractive women single, unless it is by choice. In my experience dating IS more difficult if you are less attractive, but of course things do work out with a bit more effort.
Reply 8
Personally, yes.
Prettier girls have a tendency to have a less-than-spectacular personality, and as someone above mentioned, in relationships people get progressively more beautiful to you anyway, and so by going for plain girls you are both minimising the risk that you'll date a psycho whilst still having a considerably physically attractive girlfriend at the end of it.
I approach any girl I find cute, I like to take a chance because if I don't attempt it then I've missed it! But often I find that girls of the "popular" group are crazily close minded and we are just not compatible. I'm not saying all of them because some of them are very nice indeed! But.. if by pretty you mean looks like an expensive hooker then most guys would rather not make them their girlfriend as you wouldn't want to take someone like that home to see your parents.
Original post by Anonymous
I've noticed that nearly every plain looking girl has a boyfriend. It seems like the very attractive girls are the ones who are more likely to be single. Guys always talk about the really pretty girls, but end up going for the plain ones. One of my male friends admitted to me that he wouldn't ask out a really pretty girl because he is intimidated by them, and that he tells himself that plain girls are more down to earth, even though deep down he knows that's not necessarily true. Guys, is this how you feel? Are you scared to go for pretty girls? Also, would you be more likely to ask out a pretty girl who was an aquaintance rather than a random girl in a bar?

I know people are going to say 'everyone has a different idea of what pretty is..' but we all know some girls are considered plain by the majority and some girls are considered pretty by the majority.


I'm plain looking; do I have a boyfriend ? No.
didn't know guys went for plain girls because they were intimidated, but I suppose we all have an implicit ability to judge our league. or realistic targets.
Reply 12
Original post by Karla_Steinbach
I'm plain looking; do I have a boyfriend ? No.


You may not be plain-looking; beauty is in the eye of the beholder after all!
Reply 13
One of my guy friends once told me he goes for plain girls in relationships because they are generally less confident so more willing to put up with bad behaviour, prettier girls are confident they can find someone else so will walk away over less.

I guess if that is true then that might be why a lot of better looking girls are single! They expect more from a relationship.
Reply 14
Original post by Karla_Steinbach
I'm plain looking; do I have a boyfriend ? No.


Looking at the replies on this thread, it probably won't be very difficult for you to find one.
Original post by Anonymous
Looking at the replies on this thread, it probably won't be very difficult for you to find one.


But I'm Dutch :frown:
Reply 16
Original post by Karla_Steinbach
But I'm Dutch :frown:


Why would that be a problem?
Reply 17
Psychology says people choose a partner who are a similar level of attractiveness to how they perceive themselves to be... And that they would choose a more attractive person but are scared of being rejected. That's me being all sciencey for you :tongue:
Hmmm.

I don't go for plain girls at all.

I go for what I find attractive, which are pretty girls.

I don't get intimidated by attractive girls so no. Though I do get what you mean, I've seen it countless times in friends. The issue here is with self-confidence in guys and putting pretty girls on an unreachable pedestal.

Guys, please keep doing this, more pretty ladies for myself.

Also... People like to say 'plain girls have better personalities' etc.. What a load of ****. I've met many attractive girls with great personalities and many plain girls with an equally plain personality.
Reply 19
Original post by MasterJomi
Hmmm.

I don't go for plain girls at all.

I go for what I find attractive, which are pretty girls.

I don't get intimidated by attractive girls so no. Though I do get what you mean, I've seen it countless times in friends. The issue here is with self-confidence in guys and putting pretty girls on an unreachable pedestal.

Guys, please keep doing this, more pretty ladies for myself.

Also... People like to say 'plain girls have better personalities' etc.. What a load of ****. I've met many attractive girls with great personalities and many plain girls with an equally plain personality.


I agree with the bit in bold. I think guys are embarrassed to admit they are intimidated by pretty girls so pretend that they think they have bad personalities.

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