Insecurities in a relationship
I've been with my girlfriend for two years now. As a rational person I know that nobody is perfect but I would say that she's an exceptionally good person and that's why I'm with her. I'd say our relationship is very healthy and happy.
That said - at some point or another - I think we've both felt jealous about someone. I got quite angry about it when she said it but to be honest I've felt insecure before. I recently admitted that I'd felt the same way for a while about one of her friends. We both knew that the other person wouldn't cheat: I think we just felt insecure.
I think that's a normal situation. Am I right?
That said - at some point or another - I think we've both felt jealous about someone. I got quite angry about it when she said it but to be honest I've felt insecure before. I recently admitted that I'd felt the same way for a while about one of her friends. We both knew that the other person wouldn't cheat: I think we just felt insecure.
I think that's a normal situation. Am I right?
Hmm. Feeling jealous is okay, but feeling that you have a reason to be jealous is more of a concern.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
Original post by Anonymous
Hmm. Feeling jealous is okay, but feeling that you have a reason to be jealous is more of a concern.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
Pretty much this. Great post!
Original post by Anonymous
Hmm. Feeling jealous is okay, but feeling that you have a reason to be jealous is more of a concern.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
e.g. I often go dancing with my boyfriend and when I see him dancing with other women (even the wrinkly old ones), I feel a twinge of possessiveness. This is just a natural reaction at seeing my man in the arms of another woman; there is nothing for me to worry about (indeed, I am usually dancing with another man at the time so it would be hypocritical of me to complain).
If, however, I found that my boyfriend was dancing with/talking to/laughing with one particular girl more than he was with me, then I would have a reason to be jealous: I would feel neglected and would worry that I had competition.
The first scenario is natural (although you should limit it as far as possible), but the second is not. If you feel that either of you has a legitimate complaint about the behaviour of the other, then you really need to sit down and talk about it.
I hope this helps.
Thanks
Yeah we have both discussed it - to be fair it took some dutch courage for us both to admit it (separate occasions). But we both spoke openly about it afterwards.
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