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if your partner said/did this would it annoy you, or would you not care? Watch

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    Im leaving this on behalf of a friend.

    She has a boyfriend and he says things like ''i really want to take you out this weekend. Where do you want to go for meal?''

    Then at the meal he expects her to pay half. In my opinion if your boyfriend says ''I want to take you out'' then they are taking you out. If they just wanted to go out with you they should phrase it differently.

    Then, she took him out on the weekend for a meal and she paid for all of it as a treat for her boyfriend and then he came back and wrote on facebook ''Took my girlfriend for a lovely Chinese tonight '' One of his mates commented ''Where did you take her?''

    Is it just me or is he being a bit ignorant? Its like hes trying to make out hes taking her out all the time when he isnt.

    Just in my opinion if your going out with your significant other then you pay half or whatever, but if one initiates and says they want to take you out then surely that suggests they are paying?!
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    It wouldn't bother me, I expect to pay for my own food, if he pays, it's a bonus, if I pay for him, it's a bonus for him, we're students, we're short of money. None of this macho crap.
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    If I'm in a relationship and offer to take them out for a meal I'd never expect them to pay. If its a joint decision I'd pay my own and I'd like if my boyfriend did the same. It would annoy me if they did that, yeh.
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    This would annoy the hell out of me.
    The person should give him a piece of their mind. Tell him he's being a bit jerky and what they expect from things etc.
    Girls like to be treated sometimes, and if he's offered to take you out, in my mind that = paying for it.
    And if he wants to brag about taking you out and being a brilliant boyfriend, then he's gotta put some input in.

    Either he has really bad ways of phrasing or he needs a good kick up the rear.
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    (Original post by Cake Faced Kid.)
    It wouldn't bother me, I expect to pay for my own food, if he pays, it's a bonus, if I pay for him, it's a bonus for him, we're students, we're short of money. None of this macho crap.
    Did you miss the point of the thread?

    Its not about who pays, its the fact he doesnt aknowledge her when she pays- in fact claiming he took her out.

    Then when he asks to treat her he makes her pay half.
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    yeah...maybe he's just got his language mixed up but there's a difference between suggesting going out for a meal, and saying "taking out" especially if he's put it on facebook like, because it makes it seem like he's taking credit for it, when he hasn't paid. it would annoy me i guess lol, but not necessarily that he doesn't pay, would expect it...just the "taking out it" bit.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Did you miss the point of the thread?

    Its not about who pays, its the fact he doesnt aknowledge her when she pays- in fact claiming he took her out.

    Then when he asks to treat her he makes her pay half.
    I didn't miss the point of the thread, if he said he were to take me out, be it for a treat or not, I would not automatically assume he would be paying.
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    (Original post by Cake Faced Kid.)
    I didn't miss the point of the thread, if he said he were to take me out, be it for a treat or not, I would not automatically assume he would be paying.
    so then how is it him taking you out?

    it just means your going out together.
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    Should really phrase it better.
    My boyfriend says do you want to go out. He doesn't say I'll take you out. Most of the time we pay for ourselves but if he says he's taking me out he does pay. Or he'll tell me if he's going to pay for something.
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    I would never expect the guy to pay for all of it unless it was my birthday, in which case, I still wouldn't expect it but I'd accept it. The only acknowledgement I'd require for paying would be a private thank you - yes, I might be a tiny bit miffed if he posted a fb status like that one, but it's not a huge deal at all. I'd prefer it to say 'went for a lovely meal with my girlfriend tonight' - or even nothing at all, as that smacks a little of coupley showing off ness.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    so then how is it him taking you out?

    it just means your going out together.
    You asked for people's opinions on how they'd treat the situation and I gave mine. Obviously everyone's situations are different, the last guy I was with was very short of money, so I'd never expect him to pay. If I was with someone more financially stable, I might feel differently but I'm going on past experiences.
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    (Original post by Cake Faced Kid.)
    I didn't miss the point of the thread, if he said he were to take me out, be it for a treat or not, I would not automatically assume he would be paying.
    But if you paid when you both went out, wouldn't it be incorrect of him to claim that he "took you out"? Wouldn't it instead be correct to say that you took him out? If he made a facebook status claiming that he "took you out", doesn't that look as though, for some reason, he's trying to pretend that he was the one paying, and not you? Because most people will interpret it that way.

    "A took B out to dinner" is usually a shorter/less blunt way of saying "A and B went out to dinner together, and A paid".
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    That would be annoying. "I really want to take you out" implies he wants to take her somewhere and treat her, rather than a regular meal. He should just say "let's eat out somewhere" or something similar.
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    Sure this is your friend OP?

    But yeah I don't blame her for being a tad annoyed. Personally if I said "shall we go out to eat/get a takeaway?", that would imply we were paying for ourselves. If I said "I want to take you out for dinner/get a takeaway for us", that would mean I was going to pay for her. I think most people would assume something similar.

    The Chinese part seems more annoying, if she paid for him he should have said something like "girlfriend took me out for a chinese/we went out for a chinese", he shouldn't have implied he paid for it which I'd say he did.
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    It's the wording. If someone takes someone else out, they are taking that person somewhere-if money's involved, they're using their own.

    If someone says to you 'Hey want to go out tomorrow night' and you say 'I would but I don't have much money' and they say 'It's okay I'll take you'-they that means they're paying.

    Anyway this thread's lost its point.

    What would concern me is his making out as if he's paid for it, when he hasn't-sounds as if he's on an ego trip and lapping up her attention/friend's reactions/playing with her.
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    I'm not sure how likely this is, but he might just be ignorant of what the phrase "taking someone out" actually means. Perhaps he's under the impression that when a male and a female go out on a date together, it's always the make "taking out" the female, and that it has nothing to do with who pays - in the same way that if a boy and a girl are going to a dance/ball/prom together, it's always the boy "taking" the girl, and the girl "going with" the boy, even though they're both doing exactly the same thing when they get there. I can see how it would be possible to think that. You don't often hear a girl say that she took a boy out to dinner.
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    He shouldn't imply that he's going to pay and then not pay. I had a bloke do this to me. I paid my half but he was making out he paid for it all to look good in front of other people. Yes it's annoying.
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    If she is a big girl who likes her grub, then maybe he could not afford to pay her half.
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    I always try to pay for myself, sometimes I get over ruled but haven't had a gf or a girl who's taken any interest in me lately so saving quite a bit of money :3
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    If they were saying stuff like I want to take you out but then I pay half it would be slightly confusing but wouldn't agrevate me however if they made me pay for it all after saying that I would be annoyed. Also the fact that if I took them out and paid then they claimed they took me out and paid that seriously would get on my nerves.
 
 
 
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