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    So, last thread I made, I said how my ex had called me a **** when I said another girl had a nice bum over hers. Annnyway, last night I got drunk. Just checked my phone and I'd text her last night.

    The texts were awful.

    Went along the lines of saying I lied to her the night before saying the other girls arse was nicer, hers is, I thought she'd be annoyed if I'd said it to her. Asked her if she was cross, and she said she wasn't, and I asked why because it's me. She replied "and?"... and then I frigging said "I annoy you by still liking you". Dunno what I was thinking. Well I wasn't, that's the thing. She asked me who I was out with, told her, then I apologised for being a ****. She asked when and I said "always". She said "correct". Then I asked if I could fix things and she said "no, go to sleep". Then I said she hurt me by telling me she loved me and then afterwards saying she meant like a friend. She replied "yeah it's my fault, that's why you're a ****. Night." Then I spouted some crap saying it's not her fault, it's my fault, I should have done things differently. Said how she opened up to me, I closed off to her and hurt her now she's closing herself off to me and wish I could fix things, etc. and it was never her fault. Then I said "night xxx". Three kisses. I haven't put a 'kiss' to her in ages, and even when we were going out, it was never three of them.

    Then I noticed on Twitter this morning, she posted last night "some shouldn't text when drunk"

    Well I've messed all that up now haven't I? No good can come from my drunken outburst can it. Crap.
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    Hey mate, firstly just relax. Getting in touch with an ex when you're not quite yourself? We've all been there. We all regret it afterwards.

    You would have messed up if you had any thoughts of getting back together with this girl. However, if you're ready and happy to move on, this outburst doesn't change anything. The situation sounds too messy and she still seems upset with you for anything to happen. It's best to leave her alone for sometime, reduce contact and forget about the stupid conversations you've been having.
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    My advice is to not contact her again unless she contacts you.
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    Part of me wants to get back with her, that's the problem. Am just not sure if my outburst will have made things worse, or helped my situation. She knows I don't blame her for anything but still, she doesn't accept it. Won't tell me how I can fix things, and just says I'm a ****. I get I've hurt her, and I want to fix it, but I just don't know how, and she won't let me. She still keeps in touch with me, so it's not like she's cutting me out her life. Which could ba making things more difficult, I don't know.
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    Dude it doesn't matter, seriously, she is an "x" for a reason so you should NOT care what she thinks

    I have done many a stupid think when under the influence, yes it was embarrassing, but really... who cares? In 1 year from now she probably wont even remember
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    Yes but like I said to her. I do still like her, and if theres a chance she still loves me but is closing off to me because I hurt her, I want to fix it so she doesn't think I'm a '****'. It's like she still has feelings for me, but won't admit to them so closes off to me so she doesn't get hurt again. I dunno.
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    Here's my advice...stop chasing.

    1) She is an ex for a reason. SO think deep, long and hard before you make a conscious decision to want her back. Remember your mind might still be clogged with thoughts like "who is she seeing" "why doesnt she care more" etc. Think in a scenario where you would be back with her. Would you be happy, would it be good?, would she be happy, would you see it going the distance. If you feel like you NEED her back then you don't. If you feel like you WANT her back then sure.

    2) Seriously from the texts she's sending you this is standard "I'm a girl, this is my ex. Its time to sideline him, make him feel bad so he showers me with attention, praise and says I was the one that was right constantly" Stop ****ing pandering to her just "incase" she get might get upset. WHY would she get back with you when you're showering her with praise, attention and "You were correct" statements. We've all been there and where does it end? usually with your ex getting with another guy because this guy isn't giving her attention/praise constantly so she wants to wrap her vag around his **** to feel sexy/wanted by that guy.

    Take my situation which was similar to yours. I had a girlfriend for around 7/8 months. She went off to University and we tried the whole long distance thing but it didn't work and in all fairness I was the one being the ********. ANYWAY a month or so later she asks to meetup, we end up snuggling but then it degraded into what you have. Me texting her stating that I was so sorry for all my dickishness and that she was awesome and that we should get back together. She kept postponing it, then a week later a good friend of mine told me she was sleeping with a guy from university. I just went cold turkey and cut contact.

    I rejoined the gym, got myself all fit/toned and went to university myself. I've essentially been going a bit mental this year, shagging most of the girls that come onto me. One of which dared to post on my facebook wall "Last night was so gooooood, round 2 please " As soon as stuff like this started happening and I paid my ex far far far less attention she immediately got back into contact. Recently its even become standard for her to text me when she's drunk stuff like "You don't text me back quick enoughhhhhh xxx" and "I'm out and about and I missss youuuuu" and then "Going home now....I'm soooooo horny!!!" <This girl was out clubbing with her new boyfriend at the time.

    I'm not saying go about shagging every girl you see as to be honest you do find the crazy girls this way and no good stable relationship will come from that but GET YOUR MIND OFF THIS GIRL. GO out, socialise, go to parties, meet new girls, get numbers, play the field/games, have fun. Why are you wasting your time thinking/chasing a girl that will probably only manipulate you into praising her. It is so much more attractive to a girl to see a guy that has control over his own life instead of a guy who wallows in his own self-pity over ONE GIRL OUT OF BILLIONS.
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    Kinda wished I'd seen this post before she text me.

    So she text me with a "so?". I asked what she wanted, she told me to read my texts. She then said I was pretending to be drunk because I was typing like an idiot - pure text speak - I told her I wasn't pretending, and that's just how I type when am drunk. She said there were a lot of texts, but she couldn't be bothered talking about it as it's more 'Jonny drama'. I told her I don't intend to create dramas, and she told me to stop. I said I can't stop them because they're not my doing, and whatever 'drama' has happened, I didn't intend for her to get involved. She said she didn't want to talk about it. I said it was up to her, but I don't blame her for what happened. She said that last night I outright blamed her - I didn't, I read the texts. So I told her I don't blame her, I blame other people getting involved. She said it's easy to blame others. So I said and I blame myself for not being open with you about how I felt when we were together, and to not think I'm blaming her. She didn't reply.

    Going to leave it now. If she texts back, she texts back. But if the reason she's being like this with is because she thinks I solely blame her for how things went between us, then am hoping that could fix things a bit. Not for a relationship, but so we're not at each others throats. Am still going to be with her in university for the next few months, so can't cut ties completely.
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    haha standard female. I don't want to talk about it but I brought it up in the first place. The only reason she keeps bringing it up/ensuring by the end of the conversation that you confirm that you are the one that is to blame to because she is worried that she is to blame or at least wants it to be validated by someone else that she is in fact perfect. Infact she stopped replying as soon as you full out stated that you were the one to blame, not her and that you don't think bad of her. Validation received, she has no reason to continue contacting you.

    Essentially wait for her to respond. If she brings it up again just reply with something like this:

    "Look, It's not a good idea for us to keep talking about this. It's just going to upset with you or me and I don't want either of those things. I completely apologies for the way I made you feel but I would prefer to bring smiles to your face rather then sad faces so conversations like this should stop."

    Be more in control of the situation, you can apologise and such but be in more control. More "less sadness more fun" statements will work. Why would this girl want to get back with you if your just sad about it all the time. Make yourself more appealing to her, be more fun. Try to bring a smile to her face rather then getting her thinking about sadness. SOme girls I'll just tease and such, this is my recent ex girlfriend who turned into an FB for a while. The first message was by me and completely random a couple months after we broke up.

    Me: SMILE! x!
    Her: x
    Me: Now stop thinking about me!
    Her: I don't want to! x
    Me: Either bake me cookies or stop thinking about me x
    Her: Fine, you're gone.
    Me: Liar
    Her: I know
    Me: Where ma cookies at!
    Her: Come round
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    So, again, before I read this thread she replied. I put on Twitter about going to some gig, and she text me asking about it.

    Then I said it was doing my head in, this whole 'building bridges' malark. She asked why I was building bridges, and I said because am trying to make amends. She replied with 'excellent'. I said that it wasn't because anything I say doesn't work. She said if I stopped annoying the sh*t out of her with my texting then that might help. Said I wasn't intending to annoy her, just trying to prove am sorry, and it's not her fault if that's what she's been thinking, and am trying to prove am not a ****. She said she still thinks am a **** and it's going to take more than a few texts to change anything, if at all, and said that I should maybe try leaving her be.

    So I did. Left it at that. Waiting game now. Won't see her for three weeks now since she's home for Easter, so I guess I should try and enjoy myself a bit, get my dissertation finished and not bother with her. *shrug*
 
 
 
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