Hey there! Sign in to join this conversationNew here? Join for free

Feel like I'm not good enough and thats why I'm being played! Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Hey sorry this is a bit of an essay story but I want to give you the background:-

    I met this guy last summer at a family dinner. We didn't flirt but were just friendly. A couple of months ago he contacted me and we talked for a while, then he asked me out. We went out on a few dates and then he stopped texting me for a few days. I texted him first and then we started texting again. He said later that he thought I wasn't into sex and that he didn't want to push me into something I didn't want to do. I started wanting to hang out again, but I didn't want to feel like a booty call. So I made sure that the next few times he came to my house that we just watched films. One night he even came over after a night out and we just hung out. I then let my guard down and we started getting intimate but I still didn't sleep with him because he's the player type and I felt I would just be used for sex. I've had sex with a few guys before where this has happened, so I wanted to do things differently this time. He essentially told me that I know he was using me for sex, and that I shouldn't try to find something else there. So I had enough and stopped texting him. I think in the past he's had confidence issues and now that he's been working out more its gone to his head.

    He then got in touch with me a few days later wanting to meet up again. We went out and played mini golf and then went back to his. He cooked for me and then made me feel **** because I wouldn't have sex with him. I know from a few mutual friends that he has had quite a lot of friends with benefits and didn't want to fall into this same position. The last few times that we met up he talked to me like **** and kept mentioning all the other girls that he had been seeing. I told him he should go sleep with a bunch of girls and that I didn't care (Which I did). I know this is bad but when he was looking at his phone, I looked and he hadn't been texting anyone! I don't get why he's lying to me.

    I ended up telling him he meant nothing to me. I left and we didn't talk for a few days. Then he called me again wanting to meet up as "friends" as there was apparently no one else he could call even though I know for a fact that there was house party he was invited to. I didn't reply and we haven't talked in a few days. I know I must be another conquest, but I can't help but think he feels something. He's obviously not right for me, but I can't get him out of my system. How do I get over him? Do you think he cares? Or am I another friend with benefits. I know he has commitment issues but then again so do I. I don't exactly want to be in a relationship, I haven't been in relationship for 2 years as Its something I haven't wanted.

    What should I do? I feel like I'm not good enough to be girlfriend material but just friends with benefits and its messing with my head. I'm starting ti question myself, I feel like I'm not good enough. Should I get in contact with him again or should I leave it?
    • TSR Support Team
    Online

    19
    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Hey sorry this is a bit of an essay story but I want to give you the background:-

    I met this guy last summer at a family dinner. We didn't flirt but were just friendly. A couple of months ago he contacted me and we talked for a while, then he asked me out. We went out on a few dates and then he stopped texting me for a few days. I texted him first and then we started texting again. He said later that he thought I wasn't into sex and that he didn't want to push me into something I didn't want to do. I started wanting to hang out again, but I didn't want to feel like a booty call. So I made sure that the next few times he came to my house that we just watched films. One night he even came over after a night out and we just hung out. I then let my guard down and we started getting intimate but I still didn't sleep with him because he's the player type and I felt I would just be used for sex. I've had sex with a few guys before where this has happened, so I wanted to do things differently this time. He essentially told me that I know he was using me for sex, and that I shouldn't try to find something else there. So I had enough and stopped texting him. I think in the past he's had confidence issues and now that he's been working out more its gone to his head.

    He then got in touch with me a few days later wanting to meet up again. We went out and played mini golf and then went back to his. He cooked for me and then made me feel **** because I wouldn't have sex with him. I know from a few mutual friends that he has had quite a lot of friends with benefits and didn't want to fall into this same position. The last few times that we met up he talked to me like **** and kept mentioning all the other girls that he had been seeing. I told him he should go sleep with a bunch of girls and that I didn't care (Which I did). I know this is bad but when he was looking at his phone, I looked and he hadn't been texting anyone! I don't get why he's lying to me.

    I ended up telling him he meant nothing to me. I left and we didn't talk for a few days. Then he called me again wanting to meet up as "friends" as there was apparently no one else he could call even though I know for a fact that there was house party he was invited to. I didn't reply and we haven't talked in a few days. I know I must be another conquest, but I can't help but think he feels something. He's obviously not right for me, but I can't get him out of my system. How do I get over him? Do you think he cares? Or am I another friend with benefits. I know he has commitment issues but then again so do I. I don't exactly want to be in a relationship, I haven't been in relationship for 2 years as Its something I haven't wanted.

    What should I do? I feel like I'm not good enough to be girlfriend material but just friends with benefits and its messing with my head. I'm starting ti question myself, I feel like I'm not good enough. Should I get in contact with him again or should I leave it?
    If you got all these doubts about him then maybe you should leave it.
    Offline

    0
    ReputationRep:
    If he's treating you like **** then you should leave it be. Find a guy who will treat you right and none of this messing around bs.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Just because one guy just wants sex off you and doesn't want a relationship does not mean you are inadequate. No one is relationship material to everyone.
    This guy told you that he was only interested in sex and that you shouldn't look for anything more with him. I can see how him inviting you out somewhere and cooking for you might have confused you, but can you not see then that the mini golf and meal were just a warm-up for sex? You've obviously every right to decline sex, but if a guy tells you that's all he wants and then you agree to meet up again, you can kind of see where is coming from when he is disappointed and slightly annoyed when you decline. Wise up and start taking responsibility.
    Offline

    1
    ReputationRep:
    Am I the only one concerned that you met him at a family dinner?
 
 
 
Reply
Submit reply
TSR Support Team

We have a brilliant team of more than 60 Support Team members looking after discussions on The Student Room, helping to make it a fun, safe and useful place to hang out.

Updated: March 29, 2013
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • Poll
    Have you ever participated in a Secret Santa?
  • See more of what you like on The Student Room

    You can personalise what you see on TSR. Tell us a little about yourself to get started.

  • The Student Room, Get Revising and Marked by Teachers are trading names of The Student Room Group Ltd.

    Register Number: 04666380 (England and Wales), VAT No. 806 8067 22 Registered Office: International House, Queens Road, Brighton, BN1 3XE

    Quick reply
    Reputation gems: You get these gems as you gain rep from other members for making good contributions and giving helpful advice.