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I have a crush on my vet - advice needed on how to stop this watch

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    Well this started again the other day. We had to take a cat in and we tend to get the same vet every time now. As its private, they prefer you to have a vet that you know each time you go in.

    The first time I saw him was May last year, when I had to take one of our cats in. I see them around every 2 months at least because I have so many pets and one of them always needs something checked out or is due for injections. He was striking looks-wise. He had mostly light grey hair, maybe with some light brown in. He was relatively tall, with light eyes. Just handsome I guess.

    I passed it off and just treated it normally, like a passing attractive person who you notice momentarily and then dismiss. I knew he is just professional-friendly, so not to pay too much attention.

    As the months passed, I saw him a few more times. It came to January, when our young cats were due for neutering. Sadly one died under anaesthetic and it was heartbreaking. My mother was on the phone to the vet himself for ages, I was too sad to talk. I had to go down to pick up our deceased kitten's sister though. My mother then said she was falling for him over the phone because of their long talks. We were in contact for a few more days when the kitten was in for investigation. I still saw nothing in him until this Monday.

    I went in to drop off another cat for neutering. He said he would keep her safe and he did. She made it through the operation with their care. For some reason then I became infatuated afterwards. Last night I was daydreaming and all that kind of stuff. I realised I had to snap back out of it.

    How do I go about it? He must be about just under 30 years older than me, although he looks very well for that age and also looks a bit younger I guess. Although he is one of those people where it is kind of hard to tell their age. I am in a committed relationship and I take this seriously, although I cannot help thinking it is because we are having problems (financially plus mental health problems with both of us). My spouse has problems where he often calls me names and gets angry and I get aggression and anxiety. Maybe this has made me more interested in a man old enough to be my father (as old as my mother infact). I always had an attraction to older men in the past, but I knew these things tend to not work out. Then I found a man around my age who loves me (and is my spouse and has been for 3 years).

    I don't want to stop going to him because he is a great vet. Any ways to distract myself or should I just keep daydreaming a bit until I get bored. I am NOT going to act on it, as it is a very stupid thing to do.

    Thanks for reading, any advice would be great.
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    An update, just incase anyone is interested, which I doubt .

    Its got a bit better, I am just going along with it in my mind but trying to focus the energy on something else. It has kind of made me more ambitious again aswell. I am looking into working with animals, which I really like. It seems to have brought out that awareness. Maybe I did admire what they do after all. I wanted to work with animals as a child, so it is likely that I do .
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    Oh and another thing to add is that things have NOT been going well with my husband. We really struggle and often argue. Sarcasm has become a regular part of everyday conversation.

    This all gets worse and then my infatuation with this older guy develops more just from the tiny crush I already had.

    My husband is very awkward with things like getting help and assistance and it often leads to arguments, so today I was seriously daydreaming and it is making me a bit guilty even though its only in my mind .
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    Things seemed alright until you mentioned you had a husband! This infatuation is really not healthy for your marriage and I would really consider your relationship with your husband. Otherwise years will pass and you will grow more and more tired of your husband until you decide to cheat. Im sorry but I feel sorry for your husband.
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    If the relationship with your hubby isn't working out, tell him. No point being in a relationship that hurts both parties.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Oh and another thing to add is that things have NOT been going well with my husband. We really struggle and often argue. Sarcasm has become a regular part of everyday conversation.

    This all gets worse and then my infatuation with this older guy develops more just from the tiny crush I already had.

    My husband is very awkward with things like getting help and assistance and it often leads to arguments, so today I was seriously daydreaming and it is making me a bit guilty even though its only in my mind .
    Snap out of it WOMEN!
    You got a husband and everything, why do you want to throw that away for a VET!
    He probably makes love with animals loool (Trying to force you to snap out of it, by placing disturbing images in your mind!)
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    If you keep going to the vet and your animal isn't ill, will they suspect you of some kind of Munchausen's syndrome, only with a pet?
    This lovely vet is just the oject of unfullfillable fantasty. He probably smells of Lysol.
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    haha oh dear, as a Vet (student) myself, I know what it's like when you meet these intelligent, caring lovely male vets - I always find that men who are kind to animals (and children for that matter) always make me feel drawn to them - I think sometimes it's that these people are in a position of power and do sort of inspiring jobs- this in turn makes you feel a sort of false attraction for them, because what you are seeing is the working persona not the actual person

    if that makes any sense :P
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    long...rubber...gloves

    that is all
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    (Original post by the bear)
    long...rubber...gloves

    that is all
    yeah.... we spend a lot of time with our hands up animals bits and bobs......
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    (Original post by bahjat93)
    Snap out of it WOMEN!
    You got a husband and everything, why do you want to throw that away for a VET!
    He probably makes love with animals loool (Trying to force you to snap out of it, by placing disturbing images in your mind!)

    Yeah that's the stupid thing, I don't! He probably isn't even interested and he is a bit older than my father! Just thinking it is probably an admiration of the work he does, which has gone a bit too far. I mean, he has always been a bit of eye candy, but nothing big like it is now. Think I need to reel it back in .

    I am trying a lot, just telling myself nothing will happen anyway and that I am being stupid. I wanted to be an actual vet for a long time and I never got there because I don't think I am clever enough, so I am kind of lost with no real career options. I think that has contributed A LOT.

    Oh and he better not have touched my young cat in that way :P haha.
    I only go in when I need to, it's just that we have a lot of pets really .

    All this is very weird. Especially since I am trying to get him and my mother together too. She is a divorcee and was interested in him. So yeah, I think its a career admiration thing - otherwise I wouldn't do that .
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Yeah that's the stupid thing, I don't! He probably isn't even interested and he is a bit older than my father! Just thinking it is probably an admiration of the work he does, which has gone a bit too far. I mean, he has always been a bit of eye candy, but nothing big like it is now. Think I need to reel it back in .

    I am trying a lot, just telling myself nothing will happen anyway and that I am being stupid. I wanted to be an actual vet for a long time and I never got there because I don't think I am clever enough, so I am kind of lost with no real career options. I think that has contributed A LOT.

    Oh and he better not have touched my young cat in that way :P haha.
    I only go in when I need to, it's just that we have a lot of pets really .

    All this is very weird. Especially since I am trying to get him and my mother together too. She is a divorcee and was interested in him. So yeah, I think its a career admiration thing - otherwise I wouldn't do that .
    I was thinking perhaps you have so many pets so that you can see him more :rolleyes:.

    It's understandable, when i was young and naive i wanted to be a traffic warden and thought they had sexy uniform but then i grew up, turned 16 and snapped out of it .
    I think he probably does mate with your animals :P. I think it's standard practise . Now you don't want to get with someone who has mated with YOUR animals and then you!

    Your trying to set your mum up with a guy that you like o_O. If you have a moment of weakness you'll be sleeping with your Step dad! :rolleyes:. I'm not sure if it is still classified as incest but i will report you, just like the tattle tale i am .

    On a serious note, just forget him and under no circumstances tell him about your feelings and patch things up with your man.
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    (Original post by Future African game vet)
    yeah.... we spend a lot of time with our hands up animals bits and bobs......
    Isn't that classified as having sex!?!
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    (Original post by bahjat93)
    I was thinking perhaps you have so many pets so that you can see him more :rolleyes:.

    It's understandable, when i was young and naive i wanted to be a traffic warden and thought they had sexy uniform but then i grew up, turned 16 and snapped out of it .
    I think he probably does mate with your animals :P. I think it's standard practise . Now you don't want to get with someone who has mated with YOUR animals and then you!

    Your trying to set your mum up with a guy that you like o_O. If you have a moment of weakness you'll be sleeping with your Step dad! :rolleyes:. I'm not sure if it is still classified as incest but i will report you, just like the tattle tale i am .

    On a serious note, just forget him and under no circumstances tell him about your feelings and patch things up with your man.
    Yep, thanks, I will do. I will channel this raw emotion into my husband and focus the ambitious sparks onto discovering the career path I want and developing it. We got the pets before I met him. I always take my husband with me and there is always an assistant or trainee vet in the room too, so nothing would even happen. Plus I don't want it to. I am in a secure relationship, I am not even a flirt, it took me ages to find a good man who could cope with my weirdness. Now that I think about it, of course I wouldn't want to throw that away for a silly crush on a man too old for me. Time to focus on my husband and making a better life for ourselves.
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    (Original post by bahjat93)
    Isn't that classified as having sex!?!
    No it's classed as rectal examination....
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    (Original post by bahjat93)
    Isn't that classified as having sex!?!
    Maybe if one was doing it for their own sadistic pleasure, but not if it is for the health of the animal itself.
 
 
 
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