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Broken up with, out of the blue watch

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    My girlfriend broke up with me a few hours ago. It was completely out of the blue but she felt like we wouldn't really work in the future, although she's only been thinking of breaking up with me for a few days.

    We were happy together and she told me she still loves me and I still love her. We even had plans for this evening but she's since left and I'm currently a mess in my bedroom.

    Any words of comfort during this time? Thanks.
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    My advice would be quite simply to indulge yourself in something. Your emotions are going to be all over the place, and you'll probably be feeling a real cocktail of things right now. Your family and friends will also be there for you to talk to, but I think it's times like these when there's nothing better than some creature comforts, so whatever they are, go for it

    It'll take a while for the dust to settle and over the next few days are when it'll be more helpful to talk to those close to you.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    My girlfriend broke up with me a few hours ago. It was completely out of the blue but she felt like we wouldn't really work in the future, although she's only been thinking of breaking up with me for a few days.

    We were happy together and she told me she still loves me and I still love her. We even had plans for this evening but she's since left and I'm currently a mess in my bedroom.

    Any words of comfort during this time? Thanks.
    I broke up with this girl out of the blue.
    Well she did text me when i was in high powered, intense BF3 clan vs clan game!
    I hope you didn't text her when she was doing her nails or something :rolleyes:
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    The best thing to do now is to welcome and accept any emotions you are feeling. Upset? Angry? Sad? These are all normal and completely acceptable! Indulge in things that you like to do. Favourite tv programs, favourite food, exercise, games... just don't touch alcohol or any other drug as these will only enhance and exacerbate the emotions you are feeling.

    Next step, avoid all contact with her! Hide/delete her on facebook, delete her number etc, you don't want to be reminded of her. Give yourself time to feel these emotions and then you need to pick yourself up and get on with life! You don't need her to carry on with life, you have yourself and all of your dreams and ambitions
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    (Original post by Midlander)
    My advice would be quite simply to indulge yourself in something. Your emotions are going to be all over the place, and you'll probably be feeling a real cocktail of things right now. Your family and friends will also be there for you to talk to, but I think it's times like these when there's nothing better than some creature comforts, so whatever they are, go for it

    It'll take a while for the dust to settle and over the next few days are when it'll be more helpful to talk to those close to you.
    She was my rock. My family and friends live a way out of town so I don't seem them as often as I'd like and most of my socialising was with her (sad, I know), now she's gone I feel so lost, but I'm making an effort to spend time with more people. Thanks for your help .
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    (Original post by insignificant)
    The best thing to do now is to welcome and accept any emotions you are feeling. Upset? Angry? Sad? These are all normal and completely acceptable! Indulge in things that you like to do. Favourite tv programs, favourite food, exercise, games... just don't touch alcohol or any other drug as these will only enhance and exacerbate the emotions you are feeling.

    Next step, avoid all contact with her! Hide/delete her on facebook, delete her number etc, you don't want to be reminded of her. Give yourself time to feel these emotions and then you need to pick yourself up and get on with life! You don't need her to carry on with life, you have yourself and all of your dreams and ambitions
    Thanks, I deleted her number and took her off facebook. I just feel so shocked at it all, things were going great. Just this morning she was telling me she loved me and now this...
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Thanks, I deleted her number and took her off facebook. I just feel so shocked at it all, things were going great. Just this morning she was telling me she loved me and now this...
    Relationships have taught me the same thing you are about to learn, that you can't trust everything everyone says. Accept what people say, but leave your emotions one step back.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She was my rock. My family and friends live a way out of town so I don't seem them as often as I'd like and most of my socialising was with her (sad, I know), now she's gone I feel so lost, but I'm making an effort to spend time with more people. Thanks for your help .
    Lets...lets...get this ironed out.

    She was never your rock. Never ever ever ever ever ever rely on anyone else so intensively unless you're married honestly, cause they will nearly always disappoint you, then you'll be left disorientated and unstable.

    Make something/someone more reliable/ genuine be your rock. Like your parents/ family member someone who is ALWAYS ALWAYS going to be there for you. Phone them, email them, skype them whatever just maintain contact.

    If you don't have that/ or too time consuming/ can't be arsed, then to be honest, you don't need a rock. All you need is to be strong.

    Like you said, make new friends, build new relationships, and never rely/ or truly give your heart to someone you don't have a definite commitment to, like marriage...even then you know.

    Just be more aware, and you'll feel less like you do now.

    I know it's probably quite hard, but you have to move on, find a new crush or something, or maybe this gives you more time to focus on other things in life, there's a benefit to everything

    Good luck.
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    (Original post by reneetaylor)
    Lets...lets...get this ironed out.

    She was never your rock. Never ever ever ever ever ever rely on anyone else so intensively unless you're married honestly, cause they will nearly always disappoint you, then you'll be left disorientated and unstable.

    Make something/someone more reliable/ genuine be your rock. Like your parents/ family member someone who is ALWAYS ALWAYS going to be there for you. Phone them, email them, skype them whatever just maintain contact.

    If you don't have that/ or too time consuming/ can't be arsed, then to be honest, you don't need a rock. All you need is to be strong.

    Like you said, make new friends, build new relationships, and never rely/ or truly give your heart to someone you don't have a definite commitment to, like marriage...even then you know.

    Just be more aware, and you'll feel less like you do now.

    I know it's probably quite hard, but you have to move on, find a new crush or something, or maybe this gives you more time to focus on other things in life, there's a benefit to everything

    Good luck.

    I have a job that keeps me going, and I'm trying to make new friends but I live in a big city where it's quite difficult. I don't really get on that well with my parents, no one has ever done so much for me as she has done, or given me so much emotionally, physically, everything, and I've been in relationships in the past but this was different.

    But you're right, I shouldn't rely on anyone else apart from myself really.
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    (Original post by insignificant)
    Relationships have taught me the same thing you are about to learn, that you can't trust everything everyone says. Accept what people say, but leave your emotions one step back.
    She's pretty honest and I believe her. I think what she feels now is quite sudden and she told me almost straight away as it was a certain feeling.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She's pretty honest and I believe her. I think what she feels now is quite sudden and she told me almost straight away as it was a certain feeling.
    There's not much point dwelling on it, because she's made a decision, and you need to come to terms with it and accept it. Don't entertain any thoughts of her, just keep focusing on yourself
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    She was my rock. My family and friends live a way out of town so I don't seem them as often as I'd like and most of my socialising was with her (sad, I know), now she's gone I feel so lost, but I'm making an effort to spend time with more people. Thanks for your help .
    As another poster has said, when you rely so heavily on someone emotionally, you're leaving yourself vulnerable if the rug's pulled from under you. I found this out to my cost just under 2 years ago and it took me a lot of hard lessons to come through the other side-I was her rock but when I needed support back, she ran a mile and it took a long time to get over it.

    Do make an effort to talk to those close to you
 
 
 
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