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I don't have any friends. (girl) Watch

    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    I don't have any friends. I'm 18 years old. I spend all my time on my computer, watching telly or studying. I never go out anywhere, except to school and the local shop for food. I'm an actual social reject.

    I feel extremely sad because I haven't anyone to talk to. I lost all my friends years ago and I've lived as a social recluse ever since. I crave friends, but I have very limited social skills so it's near impossible for me to make any. I'm quiet, shy, very introverted and have little confidence which makes things worse. I've just broken up for the Easter holidays, so I'm going to be living in solitude for the next two weeks. And after that, it's back to school where I have no friends, only a couple of people who I talk to. I'm dreading when school ends in May I won't see anyone my own age for months until I go to university, and there I'll be completely alone.

    I'm desperate to find a best friend. My low confidence means I can't be in a group of people (partly why I lost my past friends, they wanted to expand the friendship group which meant I was pushed to the side), but I thrive when with one or two people. Why is it so hard to find a friend that you're compatible with. Like Harry and Ron from Harry Potter. Best friends who do everything together. Any time I find someone who has the same interests as me, they're just not someone I can be friends with because they want to have loads of friends and have a social life. I just want to find someone who's like me, who only wants one or two friends and no one else. Is there anyone like that?

    It's really frustrating because there was one girl I used to know, she actually lives only a few roads away from me, but I haven't spoken to her for years. I've tried to get back in touch on a couple of occasions, but she ignored me, which really hurt and now I'm really put off contacting her again because I really really don't want to be rejected again and come across as a desperate loser (which I am, but still). So I'm completely stuck. I so want to talk to her again, but I can't.

    Does anyone else feel like this? That you haven't got any friends but you so badly want one. You're so lonely you just feel like crying all the time. You can't find anyone who's friend-material. You have to do everything alone, sit alone in the library at school, have nobody to hang round with, no one to joke with or chat with. No one to talk about your interests with, no one to share your secrets with, no one to gossip with, no one to moan with, no one to depend on, no one who enjoys your company, no one who likes you.

    I would give everything I own for a proper best friend.

    I just feel so depressed and unloved and alone.
    • #1
    • Thread Starter
    #1

    Bump cause moderation took ages
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    TSR Support Team
    (Original post by Anonymous)
    Bump cause moderation took ages
    Sorry it took a bit of time but compared to some it only took 2 hours and we do try and get to these threads as soon as possible. Have you tried taking up a hobby, that can be a good way of meeting people, do you work at all?
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    University is where you can make a difference. Don't expect someone to be your best friend straight away but a lot will be there by themselves and people become friends really quickly. You should broaden your mind a bit and allow yourself to have more than one friend. Even in large friendship groups you're going to have one or two people that you're closer to than the rest. Take the opportunity and put yourself out there. Join new clubs and talk to people as and when you can. Stick out the rest if this year, but join a club or something to make it a bit more bareable.
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    Change ur outlook on life
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    Hiya, I'm also 18, and to a lesser degree can understand. Following the end of y11, a lot of my friendship group departed and moved to different places, so my social circle got very limited and I felt a lot less involved at school, and socially, but things have improved! Through my part time work ive managed to make a lot of great mates! However, I'm sure that come September, when you go to uni, you'll find that you really come into your element socially - you'll be living with other students you'll get to know, and there will be loads of people about to meet in lectures etc... And what you have to remember is that these people don't know you, or what you were like at high school, you can start afresh, and really reinvent your social life! I genuinely think things will get so much better for you very soon, there's a hell of a lot more life to live yet, and I'm certain you won't be living it lonely!

    Always available for a chat if you're feeling a bit lonely or down, just pop up and I'll get back in touch as soon as I can!

    Try and stay positive and remember that as long and hard as this time feels right now, there's a lot more good to come, and this will soon be forgotten!
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    University is a fantastic opportunity to make friends and is a fresh start for you.

    If I were you I'd use the summer holidays as an opportunity to develop my social skills so that when I went to uni I'd be ready to mingle and make friends.

    You could join a club so that you're forced to interact with people and become comfortable with being around others and making friends.

    Or possibly a summer camp? This would be an excellent way to develop your social skills and make friends.

    If you don't put yourself in situations where you are forced to mix with others you'll never feel comfortable around others or make friends.

    Good luck!
    • #2
    #2

    I feel like this too! Youre shyness etc seems to more extreme than mine. I do have friends, I just dont have anyone I'm really close to. I dont have a best friend or anyone who is the 'same' as me. I want one! I would like to have other friends too, but at least one person I'm really close with and can spend a lot of my time with etc. I have hope I'll find someone someday. I get really lonely and depressed too sometimes....and feel annoying when I message someone first (because people rarely msg me!) etc

    I think you need to have a more positive attitude about making friends. Force yourself to talk to new people. I know it a lot easier said than done but you really do need to make more of an effort when you leave school. Especially at uni; you can start all over, no one with know you. It's probably best to start 'practising' at school, it wont matter too much if you make a fool of yourself, you'll be leaving soon and youve got to start somewhere! I'm not confident either and am insanely awkward, but I know I must make a decision to try and improve myself if I want to get anywhere, everyone does. Sorry, not meaning to lecture, just advising and telling you what I try to do

    Sorry I had to post this anonymously, my username is too obvious and I dont want anyone I know in real life reading this We could PM if you like!
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any friends. I'm 18 years old. I spend all my time on my computer, watching telly or studying. I never go out anywhere, except to school and the local shop for food. I'm an actual social reject.

    I feel extremely sad because I haven't anyone to talk to. I lost all my friends years ago and I've lived as a social recluse ever since. I crave friends, but I have very limited social skills so it's near impossible for me to make any. I'm quiet, shy, very introverted and have little confidence which makes things worse. I've just broken up for the Easter holidays, so I'm going to be living in solitude for the next two weeks. And after that, it's back to school where I have no friends, only a couple of people who I talk to. I'm dreading when school ends in May I won't see anyone my own age for months until I go to university, and there I'll be completely alone.

    I'm desperate to find a best friend. My low confidence means I can't be in a group of people (partly why I lost my past friends, they wanted to expand the friendship group which meant I was pushed to the side), but I thrive when with one or two people. Why is it so hard to find a friend that you're compatible with. Like Harry and Ron from Harry Potter. Best friends who do everything together. Any time I find someone who has the same interests as me, they're just not someone I can be friends with because they want to have loads of friends and have a social life. I just want to find someone who's like me, who only wants one or two friends and no one else. Is there anyone like that?

    It's really frustrating because there was one girl I used to know, she actually lives only a few roads away from me, but I haven't spoken to her for years. I've tried to get back in touch on a couple of occasions, but she ignored me, which really hurt and now I'm really put off contacting her again because I really really don't want to be rejected again and come across as a desperate loser (which I am, but still). So I'm completely stuck. I so want to talk to her again, but I can't.

    Does anyone else feel like this? That you haven't got any friends but you so badly want one. You're so lonely you just feel like crying all the time. You can't find anyone who's friend-material. You have to do everything alone, sit alone in the library at school, have nobody to hang round with, no one to joke with or chat with. No one to talk about your interests with, no one to share your secrets with, no one to gossip with, no one to moan with, no one to depend on, no one who enjoys your company, no one who likes you.

    I would give everything I own for a proper best friend.

    I just feel so depressed and unloved and alone.
    How about talking to the people you already talk to at school more and spending more time with them?
    • #2
    #2

    damn, just realised that wouldnt work because youre anon too *edits that post*
    • #3
    #3

    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any friends. I'm 18 years old. I spend all my time on my computer, watching telly or studying. I never go out anywhere, except to school and the local shop for food. I'm an actual social reject.

    I feel extremely sad because I haven't anyone to talk to. I lost all my friends years ago and I've lived as a social recluse ever since. I crave friends, but I have very limited social skills so it's near impossible for me to make any. I'm quiet, shy, very introverted and have little confidence which makes things worse. I've just broken up for the Easter holidays, so I'm going to be living in solitude for the next two weeks. And after that, it's back to school where I have no friends, only a couple of people who I talk to. I'm dreading when school ends in May I won't see anyone my own age for months until I go to university, and there I'll be completely alone.

    I'm desperate to find a best friend. My low confidence means I can't be in a group of people (partly why I lost my past friends, they wanted to expand the friendship group which meant I was pushed to the side), but I thrive when with one or two people. Why is it so hard to find a friend that you're compatible with. Like Harry and Ron from Harry Potter. Best friends who do everything together. Any time I find someone who has the same interests as me, they're just not someone I can be friends with because they want to have loads of friends and have a social life. I just want to find someone who's like me, who only wants one or two friends and no one else. Is there anyone like that?

    It's really frustrating because there was one girl I used to know, she actually lives only a few roads away from me, but I haven't spoken to her for years. I've tried to get back in touch on a couple of occasions, but she ignored me, which really hurt and now I'm really put off contacting her again because I really really don't want to be rejected again and come across as a desperate loser (which I am, but still). So I'm completely stuck. I so want to talk to her again, but I can't.

    Does anyone else feel like this? That you haven't got any friends but you so badly want one. You're so lonely you just feel like crying all the time. You can't find anyone who's friend-material. You have to do everything alone, sit alone in the library at school, have nobody to hang round with, no one to joke with or chat with. No one to talk about your interests with, no one to share your secrets with, no one to gossip with, no one to moan with, no one to depend on, no one who enjoys your company, no one who likes you.

    I would give everything I own for a proper best friend.

    I just feel so depressed and unloved and alone.
    Sort of know how you're feeling although I'm not shy. My friendship circle decreased a lot in year 13 from year 12 and my "best friend", who also left, hasn't tried to keep in contact at all. Although I do have a group of friends, I don't feel particularly close with anyone as my interests/hobbies/music I like are actually quite different. It does get me down sometimes but I try not to dwell on it because I know uni will be a fresh start and theres only a few months left. I agree with what's been said above. Just stick it out for a few more months, focus on your exams and try to do something during the summer where you can interact with people such as part time jobs or clubs, thats what I'm doing You also said you won't see anyone after May but I think its better to spend time with people who you have a connection with/are close to rather than doing it for the sake of just company to fill a void. Uni will be so much better I think as you have the chance to form friendships with groups of people who have things in common with you. Honestly, you're not the only one feeling this way and things can only get better if you really try.
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any friends. I'm 18 years old. I spend all my time on my computer, watching telly or studying. I never go out anywhere, except to school and the local shop for food. I'm an actual social reject.

    I feel extremely sad because I haven't anyone to talk to. I lost all my friends years ago and I've lived as a social recluse ever since. I crave friends, but I have very limited social skills so it's near impossible for me to make any. I'm quiet, shy, very introverted and have little confidence which makes things worse. I've just broken up for the Easter holidays, so I'm going to be living in solitude for the next two weeks. And after that, it's back to school where I have no friends, only a couple of people who I talk to. I'm dreading when school ends in May I won't see anyone my own age for months until I go to university, and there I'll be completely alone.

    I'm desperate to find a best friend. My low confidence means I can't be in a group of people (partly why I lost my past friends, they wanted to expand the friendship group which meant I was pushed to the side), but I thrive when with one or two people. Why is it so hard to find a friend that you're compatible with. Like Harry and Ron from Harry Potter. Best friends who do everything together. Any time I find someone who has the same interests as me, they're just not someone I can be friends with because they want to have loads of friends and have a social life. I just want to find someone who's like me, who only wants one or two friends and no one else. Is there anyone like that?

    It's really frustrating because there was one girl I used to know, she actually lives only a few roads away from me, but I haven't spoken to her for years. I've tried to get back in touch on a couple of occasions, but she ignored me, which really hurt and now I'm really put off contacting her again because I really really don't want to be rejected again and come across as a desperate loser (which I am, but still). So I'm completely stuck. I so want to talk to her again, but I can't.

    Does anyone else feel like this? That you haven't got any friends but you so badly want one. You're so lonely you just feel like crying all the time. You can't find anyone who's friend-material. You have to do everything alone, sit alone in the library at school, have nobody to hang round with, no one to joke with or chat with. No one to talk about your interests with, no one to share your secrets with, no one to gossip with, no one to moan with, no one to depend on, no one who enjoys your company, no one who likes you.

    I would give everything I own for a proper best friend.

    I just feel so depressed and unloved and alone.
    yea the one thing i am dreading is losing contact with my school friends, but hey it does get better, PM me if you want some advice
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    Hey hun, you are not the only one I promise, feel free to PM me I have been in your position :-) (I am female 20 years old, in case you want to know)
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    (Original post by Anonymous)
    I don't have any friends. I'm 18 years old. I spend all my time on my computer, watching telly or studying. I never go out anywhere, except to school and the local shop for food. I'm an actual social reject.

    I feel extremely sad because I haven't anyone to talk to. I lost all my friends years ago and I've lived as a social recluse ever since. I crave friends, but I have very limited social skills so it's near impossible for me to make any. I'm quiet, shy, very introverted and have little confidence which makes things worse. I've just broken up for the Easter holidays, so I'm going to be living in solitude for the next two weeks. And after that, it's back to school where I have no friends, only a couple of people who I talk to. I'm dreading when school ends in May I won't see anyone my own age for months until I go to university, and there I'll be completely alone.

    I'm desperate to find a best friend. My low confidence means I can't be in a group of people (partly why I lost my past friends, they wanted to expand the friendship group which meant I was pushed to the side), but I thrive when with one or two people. Why is it so hard to find a friend that you're compatible with. Like Harry and Ron from Harry Potter. Best friends who do everything together. Any time I find someone who has the same interests as me, they're just not someone I can be friends with because they want to have loads of friends and have a social life. I just want to find someone who's like me, who only wants one or two friends and no one else. Is there anyone like that?

    It's really frustrating because there was one girl I used to know, she actually lives only a few roads away from me, but I haven't spoken to her for years. I've tried to get back in touch on a couple of occasions, but she ignored me, which really hurt and now I'm really put off contacting her again because I really really don't want to be rejected again and come across as a desperate loser (which I am, but still). So I'm completely stuck. I so want to talk to her again, but I can't.

    Does anyone else feel like this? That you haven't got any friends but you so badly want one. You're so lonely you just feel like crying all the time. You can't find anyone who's friend-material. You have to do everything alone, sit alone in the library at school, have nobody to hang round with, no one to joke with or chat with. No one to talk about your interests with, no one to share your secrets with, no one to gossip with, no one to moan with, no one to depend on, no one who enjoys your company, no one who likes you.

    I would give everything I own for a proper best friend.

    I just feel so depressed and unloved and alone.
    Firstly, never feel unloved or alone, i gaurentee you that your family love you unconditionally

    Making friends (for me) is one of the hardest things for me to accomplish. Its really difficult for me to make friends but once I do, i really become close to them!

    University can deffinately be the time for all this to change! You can join societies to meet new people and of course you'l be studying a subject with people who share the same passion and enjoyment for it as you do!

    I completely empathise with you here because making friends is so difficult and there is nothing worse than feeling alone or down! Maybe try and approach some of your old friends and see if you can rebuild what friendships you once had? Good luck!
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    (Original post by McCaffery)
    yea the one thing i am dreading is losing contact with my school friends, but hey it does get better, PM me if you want some advice
    Me too! I'm so scared of the prospect of leaving all my friends to go to university! I'm not good at approaching and talking to new people, expecially without my friends! So the prospect of university is terrifying! And i don't want to lose contact with people i've become so close to
    But its all a part of life and i think the experience will be amazing, despite all these worries. I for one will try my utmost to maintain my relationships with my friends. So scary! :rolleyes:
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    (Original post by elitemodella)
    Change ur outlook on life
    Are you taling about Law of Attraction?
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    If it helps, I'll be going to nottingham uni this september hopefully. Want to make friends?
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    I'll be your friend PM me.
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    (Original post by SheldonBlooper)
    Me too! I'm so scared of the prospect of leaving all my friends to go to university! I'm not good at approaching and talking to new people, expecially without my friends! So the prospect of university is terrifying! And i don't want to lose contact with people i've become so close to
    But its all a part of life and i think the experience will be amazing, despite all these worries. I for one will try my utmost to maintain my relationships with my friends. So scary! :rolleyes:
    yea lol i guess facebook will be my saviour
    • #4
    #4

    My situation is slightly different to you OP, I'm 22 and at the end of uni but I too don't have a single friend anywhere, not even online (tried posting in the MHSS but was mostly ignored, they all know each other too well and it seems impossible for someone new to fit in) and like you I constantly crave a really close best friend who I could talk about anything, no matter how serious or sensitive to. I've had friends, a good group of friends at high school but for various reasons haven't seen them for years and the only people I thought were friends at uni bullied me. And yeah its painful, seeing everyone in their groups laughing and chatting, its a horrible feeling and I'm leaving uni in a month or so, so I'm not sure how I'm ever going to make friends again.

    Though I do agree with people about uni, its not been good for me socially as I never found the right people that I could connect to and anyone telling you that you'll make friends instantly and easily is lying quite frankly. But nevertheless it is still a great opportunity to meet new people and friends as there's just so many people from all sorts of different backgrounds and places, societies are a great opportunity to meet like-minded people as well, though it will require you to make an effort with these things and put yourself out of your comfort zone. Good luck OP, I hope you find that amazing friend you crave soon
 
 
 
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