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    Okay, so I'm 13 and I am 100% sure I am bisexual so firstly, I don't want any of that, 'Oh you're only 13 so you don't know what you are' because I know full well what I am. Anyway, I've told a few close friends, and they've all been really supportive, but I can't seem to tell my parents. I just literally, do not know what to say. I think they'll be supportive, but I don't know how I would approach it. Can anyone help me out? Thanks
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    Firstly, I knew I was gay when I was 11, so it's totally cool for you to be 13 and know that.

    I came out to my mum by just saying "Mum, can I tell you something?" then just blurting it out. Other people I know wrote letters, if you search on google you'll find a picture of a cake someone baked their parent's and iced with the words "I'm gay". The most important thing is making sure you're comfortable enough to tell them, and you do so when the time and the place are right. Maybe you could talk to them over dinner one night?
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    Your parents have to know... Why?

    Just keep being the happy little 13yo you are and what does it matter who you find attractive?
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    There's a big risk they'd not take it seriously. Don't worry about being labelled you don't realise it but you're still young, enjoy childhood you won't ever get it back!
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    (Original post by Alpharius)
    Your parents have to know... Why?

    Just keep being the happy little 13yo you are and what does it matter who you find attractive?
    That sounds really condescending you know. She's 13, not 3. Maybe she's not happy whilst her parents don't know? I knew when I was 11 and hated that my Mum didn't know until I finally grew a pair and told her when I was 15.
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    I won't be patronising but I'd wait until you're a bit older until you label yourself. Sexuality is a very difficult thing to define, even as an adult. When I was 13, I didn't have much interest in guys or girls, but now I am bisexual. Don't be in a rush to label yourself or tell your parents. Enjoy the company of whoever you want, be it friends or more and then build your sexuality from there. 13 is a confusing time of life. I'm almost 23 and I just feel able to be open about things now. Have fun, have dates, enjoy life and leave the labels for when you're older and more certain. Think about why you want to tell your parents. If it's because you've met someone you like, why not invite them over for dinner and introduce them to him /her. After they've left you could say "I really like X, and not just as a friend". If you just feel like you need them to know for the sake of it, I'd wait. And above all things, don't do it if there's a chance you might be disowned. Security means a lot when you're young!
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    (Original post by SuperSam_Fantastiche)
    That sounds really condescending you know. She's 13, not 3. Maybe she's not happy whilst her parents don't know? I knew when I was 11 and hated that my Mum didn't know until I finally grew a pair and told her when I was 15.
    So it sounded a little condescending. Everything I say is laced with sarcasm.

    Still stands. When I was 13 all I wanted to do was kick people in their face (and win medals for it, gotta love Tae Kwon Do). D'aww...

    Then again, she's not me, but I don't see why it should bother her at that age (trying not to sound condescending. Failing). Still a kid in my eyes, growing up too fast (now I really do sound like a condescending old man).
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    Hmmm tricky. OP is OP even though they are 13. Although I didnt label it bisexuality, I do remember having an attraction to some women when I was a child. The first memory being on a bus looking at this woman who had this amazing womanly figure. She wasnt slim, but her shape was just incredible - I couldnt stop admiring. I didn't really put 2 and 2 together until I had my first same sex relationship in my early 20s and came out then.

    I think whether you should tell your parents now, should depend on how you think they would react. If they are very liberal and you speak to them a lot about your personal life anyway, I guess you could tell them. If they're very serious and conservative all the time, you may want to think carefully how to broach the subject and think whether it is the right time to tell them and consider that it might be a better idea to come out if you enter a same sex relationship. This will give your words extra weight/credibility in case they don't believe you.
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    (Original post by Alpharius)
    So it sounded a little condescending. Everything I say is laced with sarcasm.

    Still stands. When I was 13 all I wanted to do was kick people in their face (and win medals for it, gotta love Tae Kwon Do). D'aww...

    Then again, she's not me, but I don't see why it should bother her at that age (trying not to sound condescending. Failing). Still a kid in my eyes, growing up too fast (now I really do sound like a condescending old man).
    I was doing the same in karate. Still knew I was gay
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    I'm bi and pretty much in the closet, so I know how you feel about wanting to be out to everyone. I also know that coming out feels really good as I've felt amazing after every time I told someone.

    If you know that your parents will accept it then there's no reason why you shouldn't come out to them. The only risk, and I really don't want to sound patronising here, is that at your age there's a very good chance that they'll just think it's a phase or you're experimenting or whatever. But then again that can happen at any age so if you're completely sure about what you are and feel ready to come out then go for it!

    Everything that I would say about ways to come out has already been said, so the only thing I'm going to add is just make sure that you present it in a positive way rather than like it's some huge horrible secret, because this may have an effect on the way they see your sexuality.

    Good luck, make sure you let me know how it went when you've done it, and if you ever have any more questions about coming out or anything else then feel free to message me.
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    Just to add to my other post, I do believe that you can know your sexuality at pretty much any age. I remember when I was 11 I had a thing for one of the girls in High School Musical when my friends were obsessing over one of the boys haha

    I didn't realise until I was 15, but it is possible at any age.
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    (Original post by SuperSam_Fantastiche)
    I was doing the same in karate. Still knew I was gay
    To be honest, I kind of agree with Alpharius. Her parents don't have to know and it really shouldn't be made into a big deal.

    Part of the problem, in my opinion, is that we have made sexuality into such a big thing, that if you're not straight, you have to "come out", etc.. We need to step away from that. One of the ways to get people to stop assuming people are straight is to stop making it a thing where people only "come out" if they are not straight.

    If it were me, I wouldn't bother telling them especially, but if the subject came up, I'd be honest about it, though treating it like a normal conversation, nothing different than saying I were straight or I liked cheese.
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    (Original post by Hylean)
    To be honest, I kind of agree with Alpharius. Her parents don't have to know and it really shouldn't be made into a big deal.

    Part of the problem, in my opinion, is that we have made sexuality into such a big thing, that if you're not straight, you have to "come out", etc.. We need to step away from that. One of the ways to get people to stop assuming people are straight is to stop making it a thing where people only "come out" if they are not straight.

    If it were me, I wouldn't bother telling them especially, but if the subject came up, I'd be honest about it, though treating it like a normal conversation, nothing different than saying I were straight or I liked cheese.
    No, I agree, they don't have to know. But some people want their parents to know - they feel they need to be at that place where everybody important knows so that they can be comfortable within it.

    I also agree that it shouldn't have to be a thing for people to have to "come out" if they're not straight. The problem is, our parents' generation (and quite a lot of ours, actually) tends to assume that someone is straight until they are otherwise notified. I guess a lot of people would rather warn their parents of a same-sex partner before introducing them, at least to avoid the possibility of having an awkward conversation in front of your new girlfriend .

    At the end of the day, OP should only tell her parents when she feels comfortable to do so. She doesn't need to make a deal out of it if she doesn't want to, she can slip it in conversation if that's how it works out for her.
 
 
 
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