The Student Room Group

Thoughts on Dating someone on the same course??

Would you date someone or sleep with someone who's on the same course as you that you might have to spend 2/3 or more years with on the same course?
and do the friendship or relationship work out?

I'm asking this because i've noticed a person who im friends with, that have recently broken up with someone, and now looks like they are starting to get with a girl on their course and to be honest it looks more like a re-bound, but they have 2 more years with them.
I know it's their choice and stuff and im not saying they should or shouldn't lol
but do relationship in the same class/course really work out?

It's that i've personally always been with people who are on a different course's but at same college or uni.
because i've thought to myself, it wont be a great idea or it might mess up things if you was to break up, because you and that person would be friends with alot of people in the course too, and the whole break up might not just mess up your friendship between the two of you(depending on the break up) but it might also mess up other friends in the group too?(if you get what i mean?) and to have 2/3 or more years working with that person or having them in the same place, could be awkward after a while(even if its just a fling)

To me its not a great idea because...
1. Your with them every day.
2. Your going to want to spend time together all the time and you could forget about work.
3. rumours can get made easy and spread around the course etc...(which isnt great)
4. you could mess up the friendship if you break up.
5. it might not work out and would be awkward.

I dont know thats my view. whats all your view's?
would you date someone on the same course that you might have to share a few more years with?
Reply 1
Shared interests, you'd spend a lot of time together naturally - have dated someone on my course before and it worked out pretty well (split up for unrelated reasons)
Reply 2
I did it and we're still together a year and a half later. Even if we split up, we'd stay friends so I don't think it would be super awkward or anything. It's a nice situation to be in actually because you have constant support and you're going through this big thing together. Plus you don't have to take time out of studying to see each other, because you can study together. Win win I think.
Reply 3
I don't understand the downside to this. Are you afraid you'll have too much in common or something?
Reply 4
Nah cause then I wouldn't be able to flirt/pull other girls on the course without her knowing.
Original post by LinzyLoo
I did it and we're still together a year and a half later. Even if we split up, we'd stay friends so I don't think it would be super awkward or anything. It's a nice situation to be in actually because you have constant support and you're going through this big thing together. Plus you don't have to take time out of studying to see each other, because you can study together. Win win I think.


I dated someone in the same course for about 8 months and I thought we'd stay friends after breaking up too but it didn't work out for me. He made it super awkward and got insecure about who I was becoming good friends with in the course. He warned my friends not to see me so much, etc. I couldn't keep a friendship like that!

So to answer the OP, it's not always the best decision because break ups can be awkward when facing each other everyday.

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Reply 6
Realistically this is a bad idea unless you are lucky. You will split up and it will be hellish angst ridden and jeopardise your studies..
It could get quite nasty if one or both are competitive and you start comparing academics. What happens if one struggles and the other excels? It could affect the relationship. You might also find that you never really switch off from work and find that it bleeds into the relationship. This is why a lot of people at uni find they prefer even friendships with people from different courses.
Reply 8
I went out with someone on my course for 4 years, starting in second year. It wasn't an issue at all and we eventually split for unrelated reasons. That said, my friend went out with another guy on our course in first year and it was a total disaster that kind of ruined the next 3 years for her. I guess it depends.
Reply 9
probably not, at least not in my year. the way my course is structured would make it awkward if things went wrong. we do a lot of group project in small groups and groups change frequently. as a result you could end up in the same group as an ex, awkward... especially as you spend a lot of time together over the course of each project. i guess it could be fine, it would depend on the individuals though
Nothing wrong with it.
Reply 11
Original post by yennibubs
I dated someone in the same course for about 8 months and I thought we'd stay friends after breaking up too but it didn't work out for me. He made it super awkward and got insecure about who I was becoming good friends with in the course. He warned my friends not to see me so much, etc. I couldn't keep a friendship like that!

So to answer the OP, it's not always the best decision because break ups can be awkward when facing each other everyday.



Fair enough but do you actually regret it and wish you'd never tried a relationship with him at all? I think it's worth a go. Wherever you meet someone, there's always going to be the issue with dealing with an ex, whether you are at uni or not, or try to stay friends or not. Maybe you have mutual friends and have to see him at group events, maybe you work together and have to deal with that.. whatever the situation, you run the risk of it going bad when you break up, but that's no reason to not even try.
Original post by LinzyLoo
Fair enough but do you actually regret it and wish you'd never tried a relationship with him at all? I think it's worth a go. Wherever you meet someone, there's always going to be the issue with dealing with an ex, whether you are at uni or not, or try to stay friends or not. Maybe you have mutual friends and have to see him at group events, maybe you work together and have to deal with that.. whatever the situation, you run the risk of it going bad when you break up, but that's no reason to not even try.


We probably could've stayed friends if we weren't in the same course having to face each other everyday. Some space after the break up would've been good. So I rather we had kept the friendship we had at the beginning than to have no happy ending in at all.

I'm fine with other exes because we've had space to move on from each other. I don't find it awkward with the others.

Edit: also, depends how serious you are about relationships. Most uni students aren't so serious about it, so it's not worth the awkwardness and hassle. I was serious about it, but things didn't go as planned, and in the end, I would prefer the friendship over what we had.

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(edited 11 years ago)
Reply 13
It's usually super duper awkward if something bad happens and you can't even choose to not see this person's face because you share lectures/classes/tutorials/labs/whathaveyou. I don't think that relationships can ever end on "good terms".

People should be mentally prepared for that if they want to go down that road but, :smile: if you really like someone, why not?
Reply 14
Honestly, its a NO NO for me! I'm myself currently on a relationship with someone from the course and its a right pain! You see each other all the time, but dont want to be together all the time. And now, things aren't going great but I just cringe at the thought of breaking up and then meeting during lectures! There are millions of people outside the course you can go out with! I kinda wish I hadn't asked her out and asked someone outside the course! Its just so awkward :frown:

Original post by art127
Would you date someone or sleep with someone who's on the same course as you that you might have to spend 2/3 or more years with on the same course?
and do the friendship or relationship work out?

I'm asking this because i've noticed a person who im friends with, that have recently broken up with someone, and now looks like they are starting to get with a girl on their course and to be honest it looks more like a re-bound, but they have 2 more years with them.
I know it's their choice and stuff and im not saying they should or shouldn't lol
but do relationship in the same class/course really work out?

It's that i've personally always been with people who are on a different course's but at same college or uni.
because i've thought to myself, it wont be a great idea or it might mess up things if you was to break up, because you and that person would be friends with alot of people in the course too, and the whole break up might not just mess up your friendship between the two of you(depending on the break up) but it might also mess up other friends in the group too?(if you get what i mean?) and to have 2/3 or more years working with that person or having them in the same place, could be awkward after a while(even if its just a fling)

To me its not a great idea because...
1. Your with them every day.
2. Your going to want to spend time together all the time and you could forget about work.
3. rumours can get made easy and spread around the course etc...(which isnt great)
4. you could mess up the friendship if you break up.
5. it might not work out and would be awkward.

I dont know thats my view. whats all your view's?
would you date someone on the same course that you might have to share a few more years with?
Surely it should be about the person rather than what course they're on, even if it is the same one as yours?
Original post by LinzyLoo
I did it and we're still together a year and a half later. Even if we split up, we'd stay friends so I don't think it would be super awkward or anything. It's a nice situation to be in actually because you have constant support and you're going through this big thing together. Plus you don't have to take time out of studying to see each other, because you can study together. Win win I think.


you guys still together ?