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    #1

    i'm going to try and keep this brief.

    broke up with my ex (we were friends at first) after 3 years and it was really brutal, we broke up about 2 months ago and just didn't talk at all. i know it was harder for me than for him but eventually i felt i was in a place where i'd like us to be friends. when i did talk to him about it he said it had been killing him that we didn't talk and he can't not talk to me, he apologised but we spoke no more of it.

    so now it's been a month since we've been friends but the way we broke up was quite horrible, he even admits that he was a douche about it and i try to assure him that i'm over it but i have moments where we connect more than "friends" and it weirds me out because i feel as though i have no self respect talking to someone who just suddenly decided he didn't care anymore (his actual words) suddenly after 3 years.

    i don't feel like this all the time, just sometimes it dawns on me that am i being too weak to just move on completely?

    opinions of random strangers on a forum are highly appreciated lol.
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    i really don't think you should be so hard on yourself.

    its traumatic to lose someone you loved. its even easier to miss them or enjoy their company.

    without sounding pathetic, just dont let it get sexual.
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    (Original post by consumed by stuff)
    i really don't think you should be so hard on yourself.

    its traumatic to lose someone you loved. its even easier to miss them or enjoy their company.

    without sounding pathetic, just dont let it get sexual.
    thanks
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    I really feel for you. This week I've been having problems with my bf. Its so hard to have a connection with someone and then suddenly go to not having one.

    I second not letting it get sexual as that will confuse you. Also second the idea, don't be so hard on yourself.

    HOWEVER if he's said he's suddenly stopped caring for you after 3 years, I'm surprised you're not more hurt/wanting to cut him out completely.
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    (Original post by un-jardin-sur-le-nil)
    I really feel for you. This week I've been having problems with my bf. Its so hard to have a connection with someone and then suddenly go to not having one.

    I second not letting it get sexual as that will confuse you. Also second the idea, don't be so hard on yourself.

    HOWEVER if he's said he's suddenly stopped caring for you after 3 years, I'm surprised you're not more hurt/wanting to cut him out completely.
    i was really hurt when he said it thus the no contact for 2 months until i felt we could possibly be in the "friendship" place. i think the 2 months of not hearing from me really made him think about what he wants. i don't want to get back with him, but we've always been so in sync and it shows a lot even when we talk as friends. our friends have made a comment or two about us just getting back together already but it's not easy as that when i still feel weak for feeling like that still.

    it doesn't help when we both still can't think about finding anyone else, it doesn't feel right with anyone else.
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